Morrison High School - Morrisonian Yearbook (Morrison, IL)

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A YEAR AGO CJunior Banquet 19153 The Board of Editors wish to express their sincere thanks for the use of the following toast, which was given at the Junior banquet, 1915, by our most respected mathematics teacher, Miss Mabel V. Williard, who is now teaching at Charleston, Ill. As we recollect our respective positions and social standing at that time, it seems queer, but we were there once, and did many things that would now seem odd. When I think of the Junior Class I am reminded at once of a recent visit to a music store. I was in quest of Morrison Loyalty. Had you gone with me you would have found some titles and first lines which would have startled you, no doubt. The Little Old Ford Rambled Right Along, to be sung with illustrated pictures by our friend Hank Has Anyone Here Seen Henry? Too Much Ford, someone said. However, just enough to deliver its owner safe and sound tonight. Then, There's Nothing to Do but Chat, to be put on soon by Sara Mitchell. She believes in it too, you know. There was a great headline which said, Try this over on your piano. This is what we were to try: Gladsome Gladys is Gathering Garlands for Glen, great garlands of glaring gladiolas she does gather, Glen gets a glance of .......,., and there it stopped. I thot it such a pity, for that part was so euphonious. Another the publishers assured 'me had only been out a few weeks, and had sprung into popular favor at once: 'Tm the Guy that Put Olds in 0ldsm0bile, by Birney, and the answer was, There's a Little Spark of Love Still Birney. Well, there are many ways of getting information, but this beats all. I didn't know before how musical our Junior Class was. What d'ye say, you lost those Boots? The author of this is unknown. He probably wrote it and then went to war. At any rate, we shall have one in war some day, for Bump Crump is re- ported to have sung upon request, When I'm Big l'll be a Soldier. Have you ever heard that tenor solo so delicately rendered by Lyle Ritchie on the Edison? He will sing from morning until night-if you keep winding the machine- Be my little baby bumble bee. But there was a sheet which you'll admit has an original title, Along came George, introduced and pushed to success by Alice. Then, too,

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ADVICE TO THE FRESHIES Be Careful what You Eat In these days of indigestion It is oftentimes a question As to what to eat and what to leave alone, For each microbe and bacillus Has a different way to kill us, And in time they always claim us for their own. There are germs of every kind In any food that you can find ' In the market or upon the bill of fare. Drinking water's just as risky As the so-called deadly whisky, And it's often a mistake to breathe the air. Some little bug is going to find you some day, Some little bug will creep behind you some day: Then he'll send for his bug friends And all your earthly trouble ends: Some little bug is going to find you some day. The inviting green cucumber Gets 'most everybody's number, While the green corn has a system of its own: Though a radish seems nutritious, Its behavior is quite vicious, And a doctor will be coming to your home. Eating lobster cooked or plain Is only flirting with ptomaine, While an oyster sometimes has a lot to say. But the clams we eat in chowder Make the angels chant the louder. For they know that we'll be with them right away. Take a slice of nice fried onion And your fit for Dr. Muniong Apple dumplings kill you quicker than a train. Chew a cheesy midnight rabbit And a grave you'll soon inhabit- Ah, to eat at all is such a foolish game. Eating huckleberry pie ls a pleasing way to die, While sauerkraut brings on softening of the brain. When you eat banana fritters Every undertaker titters, And the casket makers nearly go insane. Some little bug is going to find you some day, Some little bug will creep behind you someday: With a nervous little quiver He'll give cirrhosis of the liver: Some little bug is going to find you some day. When cold storage vaults I visit I can only say, what is it Makes poor mortals fill their systems with such stuff? Now for breakfast prunes are dandy If a stomach pump is handy, And your doctor can be found quite soon enough. Eat a plate of fine pig's knuckles And the headstone cutter chuckles, While the gravedigger makes a note upon his cuff. Eat that lovely red bologna And you'll wear a wooden kimono. As your relatives start scrapping 'bout your stuff. Some little bug is going to find you some day, Some little bug will creep behind you some day: Eating juicy sliced pineapple Makes the sexton dust the chapel: Some little bug is going to find you some day. All these crazy foods they mix Will fioat us 'cross the River Styx, Or they'll start us climbing up the milky wayg And the meats we eat in courses Means a hearse and two black horses, So before a meal some people always pray. Lucious grapes breed 'pendicitis, And the juice leads to gastritis, So there's only death to greet us either way: And fried liver's nice, but, mind you, Friends will soon ride slow behind you. And the papers then will have nice things to say. Some little bug is going to find you some day, Some little bug will creep behind you some day. Eat some sauce, they call it chili, On your breast they'll place a lily: Some little bug is going to find you some day.-Ex.

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The high cost of candy is making John broke, had charms for some. One said, Play the following over three or four times exactly as written. You will then realize why this song is sweeping the country as no other has done for years. The melody will haunt you. This, being composed by a young lady of decided musical ability in a little town in Chio, was, If they'd only leave poor Homer's ribs alone, I'm sure I'd wear a smile like Sunny Jim. It is cruelty to start to break the cc,,.,,,. and you'll have to imagine the rest or buy a copy to get the ending. Would you like to know the song they're all talking about? Full orchestration, for sale wherever music is sold. If your dealer can't supply you, send twenty-five cents to the publisher and get a copy of When it's moonlight down at Matznick's, I want to see Carl. There was an old song rewritten by one of our residents, I didn't raise my Sammy to be falling off his chair. Just the same, he did. Just a little ad in the upper corner of the back sheet called attention to the fact that a new ditty was being featured by Fred Rastede in Morrison, and proved to be successful. To the Runyan's we must go to get a piece of cake Cwas that true?J. They say that Harold Smith still sings in his sleep, Take me out to the ball game. Does he mean Sterling or Fulton? Fiddle up, fiddle up, on your violin , attracted Clara Hanson, for she came in the store while I was there and traded a bright, new dime for a copy. Oneiof our Juniors, Alfred Hiddleson, has had a new verse dedi- cated to him, and it promises to enter the race for popularity next season. The lost chord -I mean, The lost vocal chord. Specks Weaver will propably put on a little sketch in the movies soon, entitled, How many hearts have I broken today? This is not a song without words, but one without an answer. Who knows? To Olga was written, Just for a brown eyed girl, and Martha has sung, When I walk, I always walk with Albert, which probably refers to Fenton. Iasked the dealer who wrote Bawlin' for Jack,',' and he said he understood it was Gertrude Bartlett, but I told him that song would not last long, for when Jack goes, Jill will no doubt find a Freshman John. Come, take a ride in my speeding machine, is getting more newspaper puffs than any other ten songs. That means it's a hit, and we will appreciate it more, coming as it does from one who un- derstands how to speed a Cadillac, and directed at our own Vera. I finally found a song to the tune of Morrison Loyalty, although the words were different. It read, You're Loyal to Us, Garrison. When I found it, I decided to go, but before leaving asked the dealer what