Morrison High School - Morrisonian Yearbook (Morrison, IL)

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tion Army leader in full array. She is so taken up with her work that she wouldn't recognize any of her old classmates if she did see them. Editor Burr could do no more than to stand spellbound and listen. You know Bob Collins? Well, he has a line position now. He is traveling for Ben West. That man went sort of crazy over pink and pea green ties, so Ben gave him a job peddling neckwearf' What became of Alice Rowland? inquired our old friend Stickie. Oh, she married, too. Now she is demonstrating face powder at the Boyd, Curtis 8: Co. drug store. And, speaking of domestics, Lyle Ritchie has a steady job at Johnston's Garage. Remember that famous Buick he bought? Do I? Icould never forget it. Where's my old friend, Bump Crump? That's a long, sad story. One day Bump was playing marbles out in the road, and along came some bold, bad men and grabbed him. They were circus men, so now poor Bump is traveling with Barnum SL Bailey, under the name of 'The Midget from Borneof Bayard Hollinshead didn't fare very well, either. Poor man, he is superintendent of a little country Sunday School out in Colorado. But Specks Weaver made quite a name for himself. He is Frohman's only rival. He first won public notice when he appeared in the diflicult role of 'Old Bill Salt' in the 'Nautical Nut.' Oh, yes, I did hear about him. And, by the way, I see Sara Mitchell is our Irish Ambassadoressf' She certainly was some politician, replied Smith. She was one of our Democratic Senators in Civics, if I remember correctly. But prepare yourself for the shock. Last year, when I was traveling in the Orient, I ran into Hiddleson, and what do you think he has? Not a talking streak? NNOIU As Well then, nothing else will surprise me. This will. He has a Harem. Now, Smith, if you want me to listen to you, you must tell the truth. How is Martha Burns? Oh, she is running all over the country giving these flesh re- duction lessons. Last week she gave Ruth Meakins one, and you should see Alene Trautwein. She looks like a skeleton, after two weeks' treatment. u

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PROPHECY OF THE SENIOR CLASS OF 1916 Setting-Morrison, Illinois. Time-1930 Charles Burr was editor of one of the big New York dailies. His first experience in that line was that of Business Manager of the MORRISONIAN back in 1916. Charles had become very note- worthy, and for this reason his visit to his little home town was of great importance. As Charles alighted from the Chinese Express, the first one he met was his old classmate, Harold Smith. Hi, Smith! yelled Charles, how's the town? You know it has been many years since I've been here. What has happened? What are you doing? Oh, nothing much-just running the town-I'm Mayor, said Smith. As they walked down the main street, Charles saw a big sign on the top of a ten-story building: Latest French Lids knocked down to 81.98 When Charles inquired who owned it, Harold answered, Why that belongs to Gladys Raridon. She is now the greatest French milliner in Mt. Pleasant township. Every year she takes a trip to Paris CIll.D and gets the latest fads. Oh, she's wonderful. My wife always gets her hats there. Well, that's a good beginning. Now tell me about the rest of the class of good old 1916 There are only a few of us left, replied Mayor Smith, as most of them have pulled out to larger cities. There's Louise Matznick, for instance. Of course you knew she married as soon as she grad- uated? Well, her husband was called to New York to accept a big position at Tiffany's. They are pretty well off now, and I've heard that they don't scrap any more. And there is Henry Hamilton. too. You remember his wonder- ful voice? Miss Barker was always shouting, 'Pianissimo, Henry, pleasel' Well, he is now in Chicago and is an instructor of music in the Deaf and Dumb Institution. Yes, and Fritz Rastede is giving dancing lessons in a St. Vitus hospital in Philadelphia. The other day I received the shock of my life. Someone knocked at my back door, and upon opening it there stood Helen Olds. She did not recognize me, thank goodness! She was a Salva-

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But poor John Flikkema. He's out of his mind now. He got into the habit of carrying candy down to M. H. S. in 1916, and never got over it. He still makes trips down there every noon with a sack of chocolates for the youngsters. I always knew his generosity would lead him to destruction. Well, that certainly is sad. How's Gertrude Bartlett? Oh, she is playing ragtime in Woolworth's, and Birney Ritchie is turning the pages for her, and once in awhile he favors the public with 'Morrison Loyalty.' And Clara Hanson is teaching at M. H. S. When we were there she had taken Geometry II three years, well, she decided to make it a life study. Olga Dovicke is one of the world's greatest contralto singers. Last time I heard her she was singing at the Lyric Theatre for the benefit of the new CPD Gym. Our Dutch friend, Rick, has quit posing as twins, as he got into many diiliculties, and now he is wrestling. He won over Frank Gotch last night. Well, Smith, you have told me how the bunch fared, and they fared pretty well, but you never mentioned Walter Knox. No, I wasn't going to either. You know he always was a way- ward fellow. He nearly drove Miss Barnes crazy, and he and Mr. Weaver had a misunderstanding when we were Freshies. Walter had an awful habit, and, as I expected, it led him to the 'pen.' He carved his name on the new brick pavement, so I arrested him and had him sent to Joliet. Poor Knox. S500!! REWARD!! S500!! To the man who can persuade Bayard Hollinshead to cut his hair. We fear it is becoming wild and wooly and endangering his classmates. cslgnedp FACULTY.