Morris High School - Yearbook (Bronx, NY)

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THE MORRIS LEXICON Elocution: A subject that attempts in forty minutes a week for two years, to break habits of speech we have spent a lifetime in acquiring. Experiment: A puzzle in physics, devised by some wizard, to make us believe something we cannot discover, and would believe anyway. , F. Faculty : That divine Being that shapes our ends. Freshman : A raw product, taken semi-annually from the public schools. Contrast with Seniors. Football Team: A group of young husks who are hoodooed every Election Day by a long list of failures to beat Commerce. G. Glee Club: Rival of the cats on our back-yard fence. Getting away with murder: For explanation, see Milbauer. Gym.: An elliptical name for the exercise room. fNote: We had to consult our collaborator, Webster, for that one.j Grind: A miserable person who spends his days in minute ab- sorption of his lessons, his nights in worrying whether the answer he gave in Chemistry last month was correct, and who usually becomes a school teacher. Specimens are very generally without common- sense. H. Mr. Howell: The man who made the penny famous. I. Indoor Meet.' The acme of success for Morris. Our men win every event-no other high school competing. J. Jensen .' See Mustache. .. L. Library : A place where students must not talk, but where teachers sit and chat the whole day. Lunch Periods : Periods so arranged as to make visitors think We spend two hours a day in eating, after which we go home at one-forty. Late Room: A dungeon for pupils whose clock went wrong, or Whose car was delayedgn very popular at all times. M. Mustache.- See Jenson. Z9

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Uhr illflnrria llvxirnn A. Assembly : A place which furnishes agony for those in front, but a pleasant study period for those in the rear. Athletic Association: An association which aspires to get some- thing for nothing, by admitting the girls as honorary members at the low price of twenty-five cents each. Annual: A freshman desires to know whether the editor writes the whole book himself. We refer him to the celebrated editor of the 1913 Annual. B. Mr. Ballard: A very amiable gentleman, who is accented on the first syllable, and who has a cure for every human ill. Father of the eight-hour day plan for Morris students. Bluff: One part common sense, ninety-nine parts pure guess. Book-room: A place which, like the genie in Aladdin's lamp, changes new books for old. Mr. Bogart: A gentleman who receives you very warmly, but does not ask you to call again. C. C: A mark which the freshman finds it very hard to convince his parents is passing. Campus: Like many of our teachers, grown bald with age. Class Day: The last spasm of the seniors, before being cast out into the crool, crool woild. Class Representative: The embodiment of all that is best Q ?j in a student. Chemistry Laboratory: A place which, on account of its odor, reminds us of Lake Avernus, over which no bird could fly without being stifled by the fumes. V Cut: The operation of omitting an unpleasant period, and sub- stituting lunch for itg painless to the period, but often painful to the pupil. D. Debates: Inter-society: Foisted upon us in Assembly by a hard- hearted faculty. E. Elevator: A means of ascent for teachers and other freight. Eligibility: A bugaboo that scares off many a husky young man from athletics, especially from the chess team. 28

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THE MORRIS LEXICON O. Orchestra: Produces fine musicg but why does it always manage to be out of step with us as we march into assembly? P. Pony: A little beast of burden which helps so many of us over the rough spots. But why do teachers always know where the pony goes astray, and call on us for that part? Q. Quiz: Mrs. Morse's pleasant method of ascertaining how very diligently we have applied ourselves. R. Regents: What can you say that will be in fit proportion to these abominations of the whole school? S. Senior: The foremost man of all this world. See Freshman. T Treanor: The smile that won't come offf, U. Unprepared Day : A blessing we poor seniors wish we could enjoy. V Virgil: An exceedingly interesting Roman poet. He does not happen to have written any English versions. W. Worry : We ourselves would like to know who is this great man, Mr. Eyeshould Worry, whose name is on everyone's lips. X. X: The name of a very elusive person, who guards the exit of the Land of Algebra. Find him, and he will unlock the gate for you and let you free, in a great convulsion commonly known as Regents. Z. Zero: What we shall get to-morrow for sitting up all night to compose this. Ismok GINSBERG, '15, 30