Moberly Area Community College - Mojuco Yearbook (Moberly, MO)

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l X .4 -1 J 4 -r f 'N ,- ., 7,1 ci cn cn 1: LL lt Wikia ,,-A11-..,,:,,. -,. ..:---7.57 -11-::.. EEQZS? 25: cg-Q lllilgll-as ' Ef5 ??iT ff one of the old settlers, XVOUlCl11,t stand for a massacre any time but in the middle of the week, was celebrated as Thanksgiving by the would-be children because as all the pedagogues fthe Pilgrim way of calling a teacher what was whatj were killed there was no school. Therefore that day was set aside as general school 'llhanksgiving Incidentally every Fall there are several massacres QI think they call it football nowj to revere the memory of that one back in the dim past, when men were pansies and the ladies chewed tobacco. Note: The Mojuco staff was paid a considerable amount of money, which is a rare thing in these times, to endorse or have endorsed VVhite Mule chewing tobacco as the best that a lady could chew. Difficult as it may seem, we interviewed our teacher ancestresses, and they all agreed that Wfhite Mule was and still is the best chaw. One Ancestress gave this statement for publicaion Cname sent upon requestl: I can't spit a curve around the College Inn with any chaw but Wfhite Mule. So there! Our school still lives on and ong with a background such as Moberly Junior College, according to history, has, it is small wonder. We wonder how many schools have had such illustrious founders: we wonder how many ladies today can spit a curve around the College Inng we stop wondering and wipe a tear from our eye, as we reverently toss a brick at one of the teachers or through one of its moss-grown windows, and wonder why in the heck there can't be another teacher massacre today. Wlith these tender sentiments flooding our minds, we give way and cry, Vive La junior College, long may you stand, Cnr Alma Mater. Aw, nuts. 'WW Page 92 mesa N22 af , 1 gm.

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'justicel That's itg there is justice, justice as much here as any place else. W'e'll hang john Smith Crawford to the nearest treei, suggesting a new voice emanating from M. Standish Pierce. Hold on there, folks, interrupted Alden Kroggel, there's no sense in being bloodthirsty about the affair. If we hanged him we'd argue about which was the nearest tree, so let's merely chop his head off on the wood block. That'll teach him a lesson. Heh, heh, heh! This was the cue for the Puritan maids or. Tiller girls to do an axe dance. After that thrilling orgy Smith-Crawford's neck was placed on the block. On being asked if he had anything to say Crawford heroically replied, I just bet my life I don't forget the derned key the next time. Everyone had a little laugh and then the axeman began to swing his ax. Crawford was doomed-but wait, look in the distance a specl-: of dust which turns out to be Pocahontas. She hurried up and threw herself between the victim and the beheader. As she did this she opened her hand and disclosed the KEYF? which Smith hadi foolishly left at home. Goody, goody, everyone cried in unison, now we can go inside the building, and see what we can seef, They had no sooner said it than it was done. They entered: some skipping, some turning cartwheels, and some merely pirouetting or doing a one-two-three up the steps. They found to their great surprise many old torture chambers such as Chemistry Laboratory, Study Hall, French Room and countless others. They named the rooms after differ- ent teachers and people in the merry little bunch. After prattling about awhile among the test-tubes and text books they began to drift homeward one by one. SUSPENSE There has thus far been no suspense in the story, except maybe when SOlll601lCiS head was going to be cut off. And that was all ruined when Pocahontas galloped up. Anyway there's got to be some sus- penses in a story, and the Pilgrim teachers realized that so they all began I suspending. Miss Adams was generally conceded to be the best suspen- , 1 der although there are some who still say that they can get a better pair Q at lNoolworth's for ten cents. Anyway none of that valiant little car- ' avan ever reached the door or saw the light again. A wayward bunch f' X of Indians happened to be passing by on their way to a fraternity meet- , ing, and seeing the cars parked outside the building, went in and mas- IA sacred every last one of the palefaces. And let me tell you, that pale- g C VAQQQZ facesi' is not just put in, to fill up space! even Pilgrim Casebolt's rouge 'AA' didnlt help matters. The next day, which was Thursday, that is, if the 5 .Y lo R J day of the massacre was Wfednesday, and it probably was, as Mr. Beach, . Q 3 1 P ff 91 wwf, lac F M773 4 I 93 2 FM, 'I 1,9 9 W? 'tl AW Wx

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Things We Hope Will Never Happen Roberta Russell as a Vamp. Shorty Knight in knee pants. Charles Selby wrestling in addition to singing bass. Howard ,Kelly becoming sophisticated. Raymond Swetnain losing his voice, or the words to Trees Mary Frances Keller without her sense of humor. George Bullock with a monocle. Ruth Bierman marrying someone named, Kelly or O,Shaughnessy. Josephine Richardson in a bustle. Billy Smith as a sackbut player. David Ogle giving advice to young boys. Robert Thornberg without at least live people in his car. Charles Merritt losing his nonchalance. Geraldine Thomas without a sweetheart. Ralph Mason with his own cigarettes. Page 93 J I Y , x 7 f ff ga.. JUNIOR COL M s i- 71E1'?gi3, I9 3 2 ,r: 'p3 Miz at-'H We S' fl . ,T-X