Midwood High School - Epilog Yearbook (Brooklyn, NY)

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in the high Jcbool Jenimf You lhank her loudly, and back oul uncon- vinced. Then one begins lo peruse applicalion blanks. For one lype, il is necessary firsl lo file an applicalion for an applicalion, where- upon lhe laller is senl you wilh a cool nole explaining lhal compelilion will be very keen lhis year. ll is found lo require an accurale genealogy going back al leasl lo l620 and perferably lo lhe landing of William lhe Conqueror, and a physician's cerlificalion lo lhe facl lhal you do nol suffer from excessive schizophrenia or placid disposilion. Anolher school sends lwo pieces of paper. One is headed, Index here all your reading over lhe pasl fifleen years, lhe olher, Wrile a descriplion of yourself, including such informalion as lhe lenglh of your eyelashes, your favorile comic book, which side you sleep on, and your allilude loward Newlon's lhird law of molion. Of course pholographs musl accom- pany lhe applicalionsg lhe usual require- menl is lwo full-face and lwo profile shols, laken wilh your name, school, and dale of gradualion on a card held in fronl of your chesl as lhe piclures are lakeng horizonlally slriped iackels and crew culs for lhe boys are advisable bul nol mandaloryg your fingerprinls and a lisl of aliases musl appear on lhe back of each prinl. Discussing who will fill oul one's refer- ence forms becomes a favorile indoor sporl. I'm gelling a judge on lhe Slale Supreme Courl, bul I hear lhal whal's his name is gelling O'Dwyer's personal secrelary. Gee, all I can gel is a school superinlend- enl. I can gel Max Lerner, bul I wonder if lhal's such a hol idea for my college . . . Then lhere is lhe College Enlrance Ex- I7 aminalion Board, which sends you a bloaled pamphlel conlaining conlradiclory inslruc- lions and sample lesl queslions, lo which you immedialely lurn. Gee, I don'l gel lhis firsl problem al all. Oh well, I'Il lry lhe nexl. Hmm. Can'l seem lo gel lhis one eilher. Aah, I'Il look lhis sluff over laler. Much Ialer. The firsl week, you speak of lhe Col- lege Enlrance Examinalion Boards lesls. Soon you familiarly call lhem lhe College Board Exams, lhis conlracls lo lhe Boards, and, in lhe lasl weeks of March, you merely refer lo 'em, as in, How do you lhink you'll do in 'em? Il is a sin lo admil lhal one is sludy- ing for lhe Boards. A slandard greeling is, Geez, I haven'l opened a book yel and lhe Boards are in lhree weeks. Your besl friend makes sure lhal no one is near before he whispers, You going lc Malh coaching? And of course lhe fluller of nolebook pages and rallling of founlain pens when an English leacher sporls a big word is simply due lo a passing breeze .... Unbearable guill and embarrassmenl is smeared all over lhe face of lhe person who asks, Uh, say, do you have a lisl? Yeah? Could I lake a look al il? And a nascenl sneer accompanies, Do you use Johnson O'Connor? The applicalion form of lhe College Enlrance Examinalion Board is an examina- lion ilself. A good background of plain and solid geomelry is necessary lo fill il oul and fold il, more lhan one prospeclive college sludenl has been slymied by lhe necessily for prinling one's name four limes, lyping il once, and signing il before a nolary lwice. The inlerview is a slange phenomenon.

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lore collegiate beloel wer Along aboul lhe end ol sixlh lerm, every Midwoodile begins lo realize lhal he will nol slay in high school lorever, especial- ly since he is convinced by lhal lime lhal he has done so already. A lew have known lhal lhey were deslined lor college ever since lhey were big enough lo lug on Paler's Phi Bela Kappa key, many olhers as well decide lhal more lhan a glass ol Calverl is necessary in order lo become a man ol dislinclion, and lherelore plan on enlering, in lhe mellilluous prose ol Websler's Col- legiale Diclionary, 2. A sociely ol scholars incorporaled lor sludy or inslruclion, es- pecially in lhe higher branches ol knowl- edge, a universily or one ol ils schools, also, a building or group ol buildings used by a universily or one ol ils schools . . . 4. Eng. Slang. A prison. Then he seizes lhe World Almanac and looks up lhe address ol every school he and his parenls have ever heard ol, and some lhey lhink lhey have heard ol, and mails oll requesls lor calalogues. The lirsl lo arrive is a brochure lrom a small place in New Jersey, which conlains piclures ol lhe glori- ous visla lo be seen lrom lhe sleeple ol lhe college chapel, quainl maps ol lhe lown, Olde Legendes ol Frammis Hall, which lells ol lhe specler ol a bewildered lresh- man which slill haunls lhe library, and ullra- modern arly pholographs lrelouchedl ol an up-lo-dale, 'Fully-equipped laboralory, showing whal is evidenlly lhe only piece ol equipmenl acquired in the lasl lhirly-live years lils manulaclurer's son was applying lor admissionl, wilh lour lab-coaled, be- speclacled, nolebook-wielding sludenls pa- lernally sludying il. Also aclion shols ol lhe varsily polsy leam in praclice, and serene views ol lweed-covered collegians challing, lb porlrclio under arm, pipe in hand, in lronl ol a background ol ivy-covered walls and a busl ol lhe school's lale presidenl H855- 19381. Weeks laler lhe encyclopedic an- nouncemenl ol a large, lamous, and desir- able college in New York Cily arrives, con- laining everylhing lhal anyone would wanl lo know and a lol lhal he probably wouldn'l. And only weeks aller lhal does one receive lhe modesl Regisler ol a New England inslilulion, lorly pages ol which are devoled lo a Hislorical Summary ol lhe College, relaling in greal and uncrilical delail lhe deeds and policies ol ils lruslees and presi- denls since colonial limes. So one musl make a choice. He lrols down lo Mr. Shapiro's office. No, we don'l do any business on Mondays, see. Tomorrow, son. Tomorrow comes. lnleresled in social sludies, uh? He shulliles his index cards and culs. Here's a school. The Deparlmenl ol Ouler Mongolian Civilizalion has a very good repulalion. Here's lhe address. Wrile lo lhe regislrar, see? Nexl . . . Wanna go inlo arl, huh. Well, lhis place is very good lor baskel-weaving. Besl school in lhe counlry. Nexl. So you lry Miss Bradshaw. She looks al you penelralingly, so lhal you will lhink lhal she is deciding whal college will make you happiesl, will bring oul your linesl lal- enls, will leave you, you especially, besl prepared lor lile. Bul she is also visualizing a map ol lhe Uniled Slales, wilh every col- lege represenled by a dol and every gradu- ale represenled by a pin. Ah, she noles lo herself, There's one wilhoul a pin! She names il, and draws a blank expression, so lhereupon rallles oll lhe names ol seven alumni who senl back wonderful reporls.

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Mrs. O'Brien, in her coaching on efiqueffe and speech, advises fhe boys fhaf T-shirfs and pegged panfs are nof as appropriafe as fhey mighf seem for fhe occasion, and fhal' bubble gum inflafed beyond a diamefer of five inches is no longer in fhe besl' of fasfe. When puffing one's feel' on fhe in- ferviewer's desk, care should be faken nof fo overfurn fhe ink-boffle. For fhe girls, sarongs should be worn only if fhe weafher warranfs fhem. One nofable men's college in fhe cify makes a pracfice of employing Conover girls as recep- fionisfs. There are con- flicfing fheories on how fo behave: one side confends fhaf leffing one's eyelids rise a quarfer of an inch above fheir normal level ruins one's chances for ad- mission: fhe ofher school of fhoughf mainfains fhal' fhe dean of admissions is an old lecher him- self and will reiecl' fhose who don'+ make obvious fheir virilify. The safesf procedure fhus seems fo be fo wear very 'rhick glasses, and claim near-sighfedness as an excuse in any case. lnferviews wifh ouf-of-fown insfifufions offer differenf problems. A visif fo one's firsf choice college in a New England fown may enfail walking ifs sfreefs barefoof for fear of desfroying valuable hisforical relics. ll am nof referring fo fhe facull'y.l One sfu- denf visifed a small college, his fhird choice, and was freafed liberally wifh wine, women and song. When his second choice accepfed him, and he chose fo go fhere, said small college billed him for fhe enferfainmenf. A person iusf refurned from an infer- I 8 view is approached as one appr0aCl1eS someone iusf refurned from visifing a friend on fhe poinf of deafh. lPerhaps fhey had been looking in fhe mirror.l The corners of fhe moufh of fhe inquirer droop, his lips quiver, his Adam's apple bobs, his eyes blink, his hand grips fhe vic'rim's forearm: l-low-how was if? l-l'll fell you. l'le said l had a very good chance of being accepfed. Bul' fhaf's whaf he said fo five kids who gof reiecfion nolices. As nofices of accepf- ance or reiecfion begin fo frickle in, fension mounfs. Two bosom friends were applying fo fhe same exclusive firsf-sfring col- lege, il' was unlikely fhaf fwo persons from one school would be accepfed. During Brofherhood Week, '4 - one of fhem was passing fhe chemisfry laborafory when a flask of sulfuric acid flew pasf his nose. lf was fhe nexf day fhaf fhe usually imperfurbable Mr. O'Brien was shocked 'lo find fhe ofher al' fhe boffom of fhe elevafor shaff. And have you ever noficed how seniors sfay away from windows on fhe upper floors? Despife our conslifufional guaranfees againsf cruel and unusual punishmenf, some colleges fake pleasure in sending ouf pre- liminary nofices. One New England insfifu- fion sends large, gilf-edged cerfificafes, suifable for framing, which sfafe fhaf The Presidenf and Fellows are happy fo An- nounce fhaf You l-lave Been Accepfed as an Official Candidafe for Admission. Anofher school 'lells you whaf group you are in. The groups run as follows: