Midland University - Warrior Yearbook (Fremont, NE)

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Don't cry. little boy, because you lost your handkerchief. The wind will blow your nose. Deichmann in Far Fast Cafe: How goey, Tong? You gotten» rice cake? Chink: No, Sir, hut the roast beef is ex- cellent today. Little Pete: Say, Coach. I want bigget shoes. Catlin: Those fit; why do you want bigg- r ones. Pete: So I can cover more ground in the same amount of time. The engagement period is solitaire con finement. Pardon me. is your house on the bus line? Yes; why? Better move it. then; there's a bus coining. You could tell what a smart guy lie was. He always looked both directions when he was crossing a one-way street. A sophomore is a person who wails for a freshman to come along and push the re- volving door. I just didn't get the brakes. said the flivver as it rolled down the hill and draped itself over a stone wall. HOW TO CIIOOSK YOl K WIFE In parts of Africa where women carry great loads on their heads the men choose their wives on the strength of their neck. This custom is followed to some extent in this country. College is just iiko a washing machine; you get out of it just what you put in—but you’d never recognize it. Dorothy: What kind of a car have you? Paul: I got a wreck. 1). H.: A wreck? Paul: Yeah. Every time I park it a dozen people come up and ask me if I’ve reported the accident yet. B S R e This Servant Works for SI.50 a Year e i i B B B B B B B B B B B I The Universal Vacuum Cleaner will clean your home for less than $1.50 a year without using up your own physi- cal strength or some one else’s. Saving in labor or wages will pay its cost the first year. SOLD IN FREMONT EXCLUSIVELY BY H. Doering Hardware Co. “Quality Hardware” Telephone 856 Fourth and Main

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I i FIRST, LAST and ALWAYS The Store that has just what the Younger Fellow wants. ■ ■ Read Our Ads Watch Our Windows The Home of Hart Schaftner Marx Clothes 28. Kirs! annual track and field meet. Ten high schools compete. Nelson high school wins. 28. V. V. C. A. tea at Beegle hall ti» raise funds for Estes park delegates. 30. 12.01 a. m. C'mon. fellers. yells An- ri resen. and from behind the big gray ear crept angry sophs to eat the pale freshies. One soph got away, in a car. The rest gave themselves to fruitless off ?rls at untying ropes mysteriously wrapped around ankles and fingers by an unexpected horde f year- lings. Freshmen extract guarantee of safety THE MAIDEN’S PBAYEK I’lease, dear Lord, help me to he half as popular as tin dog that ran through our lec- ture room this morning. Then the absent-minded professor sal down to breakfast, locked his egg ill the safe and broke his promise. “Why are girl's lips like a book? “I know. Bed only bet wen meals. and skip out early in the morning to Omaha and the candy factory. May 4. Dichsen places second in state ex- temporaneous contest. Coder represents Mid- land in the peace oratorical contest. 11-13. Fourteen co-eds spend week-end Jt Bid-A-Wee camp. Thrills and hits of fun. 14. Theta Gamma Epsilon banquet. 18. All-college picnic at l.inoma Beach. 29. Honor Day program. 30. Alumni banquet. 31. Commencement. One of the Theta Gamma Epsilon fratern- ity men failed in all the courses he was taking. lie telegraphed to a sympathetic mother, “Failed in all subjects. Prepare Papa. Mother telegraphed back: “Papa prepared. Prepare yourself. When there is nothing more to he said some boid) always says it.

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College people are discriminating. They recognize quality, and know the value of service. You will find both with us, and a genuine welcome awaits you. L. F. Holloway Hardware Company “Everything in Hardware” Phone 92 Sixth and Main It i reported that t!ic average college shirk She: You say your father gave you a Span Irivrs with one hand because he can't afford ish name? What is it? it chauffeur. ile: I don't know—1 don't speak Spanish. I vers: Better cut that stuff. Hark ye! The height of unimportance. Best Metz: Na ! Been cut too much already. manat a companionate marriage. EMPRESS THEATRE WHERE THE BIG PICTURES PLAY AT POPULAR PRICES DAILY MA.TIXEE • • • 2:00 3:30 EVENINGS • - • 7:30 9:00 A Fremont Institution iiutli Martin: Daddy, how do you spell Artist: You sure have got that school-girl “Cocoon”? complexion. Our college president: Don’t stutter, dauglt- Model: That's me all over, ter. and say “Colored Man.” Dense drivers cause dense traffic. Berek: I'm the kind of a fellow who asks the newsboys who won the game. Ford Sales and Service UNIVERSAL GAS STATION 2nd and Main Courteous Service JOHN MONNICH