Metropolis High School - Illohmet Yearbook (Metropolis, IL)

Page 13 text:

Last IDill and Testament We, the class of 1934 of Metropolis Community High School, in the county of Massac and the state of Illinois, being blessed with reasonable intelligence and a desire to aid lesser creatures do hereby create, ordain and sanction this, our last will and testament. After the payment of all debts and lawful claims, we request that the remainder of our wealth be dispensed with as follows: To the class of 35 we leave the task of becoming shining examples for the Freshmen (as we were.) To the class of 36 we leave the work of making money for the event of the year, the Junior-Senior Reception. To the class of 37 we leave the joy of no longer having the title “just a green Freshie.” . To the oncoming class of 38, we leave our dignified manner and good behavior. To the faculty as a whole we leave the task of producing another class as witty, brilliant, mischievous, individualistic, and most important of all, as efficient as ours. To our trust-worthy janitors we leave an abundant supply of chewing gum, all bands, and the fancy designs scratched on the assembly desks. I, Helen Kotter, hereby will my ability to keep Joppa boys in training to Nell Rose Moreland. I, Modena Smith, will my ability to keep up in bookkeeping to John Collard. I, “Watt” Gillespie, will my ability to get all bunged up in the old pig-skin game to next year's star athlete, Chad. Zettler. I, George Rice, will to anyone feeling in the mood, my gift of writing poetry to the “ferns of M. C. H. S. I, Merle Scott, will to anyone provided with an excess supply of energy the right to hold heated arguments with next year’s American History, “Prof. I, Ruth Bremer, hereby will to Verna Verbarg my galoshes, so that next year when she no longer has anyone to bring her to school she will not have to spend her money for unneccessary shoe shines. I, James Matthews, leave my position, as forward on the “Farmers’ to Barber Frazee, provided that he score 20 points per game against the “Bugchasers, as I didn’t. I, Edith Dunn, hereby will my ability to be absent from school on Mondays and to sleep in the assembly to Helen Evers. I sincerely hope that she makes as great success of both as I have. I, Alberta Fullmer, will to Margaret Scott my naturally bright disposition and also my much mis-used business training book. I, Elizabeth Teckenbrock, will to Dorothy Jessing my place in Latin class, on one condition: that she persuades Miss Rush to talk loud enough to cause a general disturbance throughout the building. I, Esther Bremer, will my shortest pencil to Golda Wallace providing that she uses it to a good advantage in short hand. I, James Crain, will to J. H. Craig all of my surplus fat so that he will not be obliged to remain under weight hereafter. (I suggest he consume grape nerts.) I, Leonard Copley, do hereby will and bequeath to Paul “Shep” Sheppard my ability to be a good boy while taking girls uptown. I, Kermit Kruger, wishing no harm to befall her, will to Bobbie Park two walking canes as a precaution against falling down, especially when chasing boys. I, Ruby Vaughn being in my sane mind do hereby bequeath my dimples to Bill Jeffords, as he seems to have such an interest in them. I, Billie Yost, do hereby will and bequeath my seat on the visitors side of the gym to Alice June Causer, provided she manages to sit next to the handsome males of the opposing team. I, Rose Black, being of sane and sound mind, (I hope) do hereby will and bequeath my ability to play a mellophone in the band to my shadow, Marbeth Heath, providing she fill this position and keeps up my side-lines as well as I have. I. Mary Ellen Gurley, do hereby will my nights of worry over Civics, English IV, and Typing I, to Peggy Morgan, providing she can take it. I, Helen Gillespie, will my ability to listen to Wayne King's broadcast in an out of town Plymouth to no one. I, Naomi Bremer, leave to anyone capable, the chance to hold interest in both Vienna and Alton. I. Francie Goodall, do hereby bequeath to Helen Buchanon my vanity case, providing she manages to raise as much protest as I have and yet get by with it.

Page 12 text:

CHARLES TURNER “We admire his woman hatredism.” RUBY VAUGHN Honor and stability—the source of success. THELMA WALLACE “Full of hard work and good fun.” HAROLD WATERS “By asking foolish questions he takes up the recitation time.” WILLIE LEE WALTERS “Energy and persistance conquer all things.” CAROLYN WISEMAN “C” is for Carolyn, a gal full of fun, Carolyn and fun are the same one. ALICE WIEDEMAN “Contentment furnishes plenty of enjoyment.” HERMAN WIEDEMAN “A charter member of the Bachelor’s Club.” LORENE WILCOX “She's shy but she has a temper.” MILDRED WILSON “Curly hair, She’ll save someone a hairdresser’s expense.” HELEN WOODWARD “Her ambition reaches to a great height.” BILLIE F. YOST A sudden rush from the stairway, a sudden raid from the hall. MARGIANNA YOST “Quiet, unassuming and lady-like, That’s Margianna.” JAMES FITCHPATRICK “The best of men have ever loved repose.” Page Ten

Page 14 text:

I, “Piffle” Miller, being sober for once, gladly will to Hazel Harper my ability to fall down practically every flight of stairs in M. C. H. S. and still maintain a graceful position. I, Alvin Oakes, will my job of digging up dirt centered around M. C. H. S., for the Illohmet to Joseph “Dog Simmons. I, Hazel Kruger, do hereby offer to anyone having a letter man in foot ball my profound sympathy while watching a game. The suspense is terrible. I, William Luster Leukering being for once sane and two-thirds sober, do will and bequeath to Bill Jeffords my ability to survive six wrecks in one Ford and keep the Ford and chauffeur in shape to make the trip to the glove factory region. I, Elvis Searles, do hereby will the moss in my back yard to George F. Sullivan, so that he may always have it with him. I. Dorotha Main, will my success in providing my friends with conveyance to the “Black Cat after school to Helen Mae Dunn. I, Walen Barger, will my book on “Success with the Women” to Joe “Ladies’ Man Simmons. I, Eugene Butler, will to “the three Muskateers Park, Nave and Gillespie, any of the finer opposite sex, which I may have been obliged to leave behind. I, Louise Aikens will my voluptous curves to Dorothy Daly with the hope that she may develop a more perfect Mae West “figger.” I, Lavere “Wally” Gregory, will my position as Fern Neikamp's boxing instructor to none other than Milford “Barrell’ Dunmier. May he long survive the punches. I, Helen James, being of sane and sober mind, do hereby bequeath my ability to argue with Joe Simmons on personal and non-personal subjects and still remain one of his best friends to anyone willing to undertake the task. I. Mildred Wilson, do hereby will to Irene Lowry my ability to be absent from school and get by with it. I, Harvey Evans, leave nothing in general to no one in particular because I haven’t very much of anything and need all I have. I, Velda Jessing, will my quiet ways and “my interest upstairs to Mary Louise Busclaus hoping she succeeds better than I have in the past. I, Willie Lee Walters, leave my ability to furnish Marion P. Miller with information concerning a certain Chicagoan to anyone liking a good quiz. I, Margianna Yost, hereby will my quiet and bashful manner to Hazel Flanagan, hoping she will appear more domestic in Miss Steers Home Ec. class. I, Lorene Wilcox, will to Grace Baker my shorthand book, providing she promises to make better grades than I did. I, Mary Rose, will to Marbeth Heath the five minutes which I daily devoted to study. May she grow wiser and still keep her strength. I, Hazel Hedden, will my ability to never recite in class and still not receive a red grade to Gladys Benjamin. I, Marie Markus, do hereby will and bequeath all of my excess knowledge of Chemistry to Joe Simmons, with the hope he profits by it. I, Gordon Ramsay, will my sunshiny smile to Carleton Hunnerkock and my cough to Francis Kidd. I trust they will struggle through life with a cough and a smile. I, Hilda Bess, hereby will to Josephine Lytton my typewriter. Long may she pound the keys. I, Rosalie Frazier, will my position as entertainer in Miss Wicecarver’s Bus. Tr. class to anyone feeling in great need of employment. I, “Bohonsky “Einstein Zettler, the Wonder Boy, who knows all and sees all, being in sober but unsound mind do hereby will and bequeath my position as assistant to Mr. Oliver Huston Tripp to no one. This being my last will, I advise Fern Neikamp and Alice Morrow to can some of the chatter and wise-cracks. I wish them to be faultless in their second year in Chemistry. I, Ralph Green, will the use of the Sousaphone and my place in the band to J. T. Culp. May he give the band rhythm as it’s never had before. I, Grace Trampe, do hereby will to Frances Riepe my happy school days, hoping that the remainder of her term in this great institution, M. C. H. S., may furnish her with a memory as full of pleasure as mine. I, Johnny Paust, in my sane and sober mind, do hereby bequeath to Pat Park my ability to sell nothing for something to anybody who cares nothing about the something he buys. I, Harold Waters, do hereby will four inches of my height to “Tubby Batson, thinking as how it might reduce the circumference of his waistline and add to the altitude. I, George Rogers, will my number twelve shoes to Barber Frazee. May he never stumble.