Metropolis High School - Illohmet Yearbook (Metropolis, IL)

Page 33 text:

r Calvin Shelton, and gives up all claim on Lera to the aforesaid young man. 15. Verna Helm leavs to Clara Barton her sweet simplicity. 16. Minnie Weaver wills to Mr. Stein one Webster’s dictionary, the contents to be absorbed so that Mr. Stein can Hooverize on shoe leather. 17. Luella Cox wills to Alma Miller her dimples ana her modest ways. 18. Laura Leukering leaves to Lydia Sturgis her excellent ability in mathematics. 19. Alice Miller leaves (to whom it may concern) . To secure wavy tresses of a non-comable kind, roll hair upon kids before retiring; give one stroke of the brush (only one) before going to school. 20. Theresa Williams cheerfully leaves to Mr. Wiant all of the Civics grades he has so gallantly bestowed upon her. 21. Sam Willis bequeaths to William Shappard his position as teacher’s pet. 22. Juel Jackson leaves—oh, just leaves to take up a professorship in Frogology in the Bedlam University. 23. George Slimpert leaves to Millage Dixon one gallon of ice cream, to be baked till Wellman Kerr wears a Number Three Shoe. We wish the following notice to be printed in the Daily News: “The patrons of the Metropolis High School are urged to visit the school as often as possible—the ‘Edison’ will then be played.” In testimony whereof we now set our seal and publish and decree this our last will and testament, in the presence of the witnesses named below, this sixteenth day of May, in the year of our Lord nineteen hundred and eighteen. CLASS ’18. — 29 —

Page 32 text:

CLASS WILL ‘18 We the Seniors of the class ’18 City of Metropolis State of Illinois being of sound mind and disposing memory, after due deliberation do make our last will and testament, hereby revoking all former wills of whatever nature by us made. 1. To Mr. Schrader we bequeath this motto: ‘‘Do unto others as you wished to be done by”, to be kept in mind when making out all future examination questions. This will probably save a doctor bill, for some poor Senior. 2. To Mrs. Cutting we leave the caretakership of our magnificent high school building. 3. With our characteristic generosity, we leave to Mr. Stein all of the test tubes and beakers we have broken. 4. To Miss Bauer we leave the care of the Hall (Mose) and the right to teach English (Wooley) to the succeeding classes. 5. We bequeath to Miss Davy the right to assign the oncoming history classes as long lessons as she sees fit. (Poor kids.) 6. We leave to Mr. Wiant (Goat) one pair of sheep shears, to be used in making his fortune—wool has gone up. 7. To Mr. Lewis we leave the privilege of instructing the oncoming Latin classes in the translation of Latin. 8. To our janitor, Mr. Wright, we leave all the notes we have written, to insure a hotter fire for the the next year. 9. Lera Amlir.gmeyer wills to Helen Young, her seat in the Freshman row. 10. Madge Morgan bequeaths to Mr. Schrader a portion of her still, small voice. 11. George Yetter bequeaths to Russel Baker, one foot of his feet (six). 12. Henry Austin leaves his soul affections to— ‘‘A certain young lass In the Sophomore Class.” 13. Alice Dugger gives to Vallee McGlasson her powder puff and patent hair curlers. 14. Arthur Weaver wills his stately Senior Walk to — 28 —

Page 34 text:

(Elaaa fJopni Onct we wuz the biggest class that ever went to school, But when we cut up capers and broke most of the rules The principal, she lectured, and the rest began to scold, Till we just can’t remember half the things ’at we wuz told; But this, to our discomfort, we learned, without doubt, That “the Faculty” will get you if you don’t watch out. We each have an ambition—a dearly cherishd goal— But only one has reached it, at least that’s what we’re told. We can’t all be as lucky as Henry is, I guess; But how could we exect it—we couldn’t all have Bess. George Yetter, our class favorite, can boast, because he’s stout, But the U. S. A. will get him, if he don’t watch out. And, among our members and classmates, there’s a dude; Tho’ George says he “hates girls,” there is one, we conclude. There’s always something doing when Sam’s around, you bet; He’s the gay youngster that the teachers can’t forget. Our ranks will soon lose Alice (we know what she’s about), For a Hoosier’s going to get her if she don’t watch out. Alice Miller’s curly locks are “fostered” well with care, But she’s as yet not able to make them “everwear”. Arthur’s high ambition is not for Midas’ touch; — 30 —