McKinley High School - President Yearbook (Buffalo, NY)

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THE ARTISAN 107 THE MEN XVHO VVORK IN NVOOIT' The 111011 who work ill wood !-here is a clau That other workers well may envy-these VVho Serve so much, so Well, their fellow mah, 1Vl1o turu to use the tall and sheltering trees. The roof of green becomes a roof of gray, The sturdy trunk tl1e pillars of a home. They fashion us tl1e i11fa11t'S cradle, they Are part of every tlireshold, every 1'001l1. The chair we dream i,11 by the cheery fire, The hoard at Wliich we gather for the meal, The bed to which our weary limbs retire, Arid GVCl'j'iflAli11g' we know 211161 love and feel, They shape from fallen forests for our need- Yea, even that last room ill wl1icl1 we rest, When we lie down to rest at last indeed, Tl1e WO0Cll2l1Ni7S saiuted lily o11 our breast. Their 'S 11ot the dust of 11'1,i11es, tl1e grime of toil I11 sweaty shops of steel and molten brass- 'lllll'il'lS is the scent of SR'l1VllllSt illlll of soil, The song of waters, Xvllld across the grass. .l.l1 everytliiiig they make for us they leave The wooded upland and the quiet shores, Yea, into every article they weave Some iueuiory of God's great out-of-doors. USE YOUR, HEAD A woodpecker peeks, out a great many specks Ol? sawdust, when building a hut. He works like a nigger, to make the hole bigger- He 'S sore if, his cutter 1vo11't eut. He do11'11 bother with plans, of cheap artisans, But tl1e1'e's one thing, C2111 rightly he Said: The whole excavation, has this 0X.DlZlll2li'i0ll- He builds it, by using his head. FIGURE IT OUT How lllillly applies did Adam and Eve eat? Some say Eve eight illlfl Adam two-a total of 1011 only. Now we figure the thing out far dilterently: Eve eight a11d Adam eight also-total 16. We think the above figures are entirely wrong. lf Eve eight a11d Adam 82, certainly the total will be 90. Scientific 1'11e11, however, 011 the Streiigtli of the theory that the Hl1i'0Clill1Vlil,DS were giants, reason Sillllliiillillgf like this: Eve S1 Zllld Adam 82-total 163. 'Wrong Zlgalll. Xvllilt could be clearer iillilll it Eve S1 Ellld Adam S12 the total was 892? l believe the following to hc tl1e true solution: Eve 814 Adam, H1161 Ada111 S 124 Eve-8,938 i Still Zll'l0ifl161' calc1'1latio11 is as l'o'l'lows: If Eve, S14 Adam, Adam 81,242 oblige Eve, 82,056

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106 THE ARTISAN OLD DARKEY'S ADVTCE ' ' Dontt be what you ain'tg Jes' be what you is. lf you is not what you am, Then you ani not what you is. If you're just a little tadpole, Don 't try to be a frog, If you're just the tail, Don 't try to wag the dog. You can always pass the plate, 'lt you can't exhort and preach. lf you're just a little pebble, Don't try to be the beach. Don't be what you ain't, Jes, be what you is. THE OP'l'l'M,l'S'l' lilis horse dropped dead and his mule went lame And he lost three cows in a poker game, And a cyclone came on a summcr's day And carried the home where he lived awayg Then the tax collector he came around And charged him up with a hole in the groundg Then. the village marshal he hovc in view And made him settle his street tax, too. Did he grieve when his old friends failed to call? Wlieii the cyclone came and swallowed all? Did he moan or sigh, did he weep or cry? Did he curse the hurricane sweeping by? No! No! Not he, but he climbed on the hill WilCl'C standing room was left him still, And taking his hat from his old bald head, Witli poise and sublime, he gently said: The last six months have been bad, you bet, lint, thank God, 'l haven 'tl the small-pox yet l SOME VOCABULAR-Y A man whose vocabulary seems to be unlimited when he desires to describe conditions, and whose nights were made sleepless by a switch engine, recently wrote as follows to the railroad company: Is it absolutely necessary in discharge of his duty day and night, that the engineer of your yard at the upper terminal bridge should make his engine ding and dong and fizz and spit and clang and bang and buzz and hiss and bell and wail and pant and 1-ant and yowl and grate and grind and putt and bump and click and clank and chng and moan and hoot and toot and crash and grunt and gasp and groan and whistle and wheeze and squawk and blow and jar and peek and rasp and jingle and twang and claek and mumble and jangle and ring and clatter and yelp and eroak and howl and hum and snarl and putt and growl and thump and boom and clash and jolt and jostle and shake and screech and snort and snarl and slam and shake and throb and crink and quiver and rumble and roar and rattle and yell and smoke and smell, and shriek like h---il

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S 103 THE ARTISAN WI-IAT A SCREVVDRIVER CAN DO. - Manicuring tool. Chisel to split wood. Crowbar to lift boxes, pry open cases, and windows, etc. Hammer-using the handle as a mallet. Scraper-removing paint, removing chewing gum from soles of shoes. Tire 'iron-removing, placing pneumatic tires. Paddle-for mixing paints. Putty knife. Prying lids from friction-top cans, or plug holes in milk cans. Removing tacks. Reainer for enlarging holes, Making holes in wood for starting screws. lice pick. 'llool for insertion in electrical light sockets to see if there is juice on the line. Removing caps from bottles. Toasting fork. A woman in an eastern city left a bag ol' jewelry worth live thousand dollars in a taxicab. The next day she learned that the driver had turned in the Wealth Io the police station. lf only did my duty, said the taxi driver. Go back into the boyhood of that taxi driver and somewhere you will find some training in the home, school, or church where he learned that it was not a, fine and showy thing to he honest. He didnlt learn that he would get credit for being honest. He simply learned that it was his duty as a man and a citizen to be honest. Wliat a wonderful lesson it is once it learned! I only did my duty. Schools of Industry, schools where the simple knowledge learned from hooks is made pointedly useful, and immediately applicable to the duties and business of life, directly conductive to order, cleanliness, punctuality, and economy schools on such principles, deep as the lowest depths of society, and leaving none of its dregs untouched, are the only means of removing the scandal and the danger that besets us in this nineteenth century of our ljorcl.-Diclivens. w It has always been in my observation of human nature, that a man who has any good reason to believe in himself never iflourishes himself before the faces of other people in order that they may believe in liini.-D'ich'eo1s, It is a pleasant thing to reflect upon, and furnishes a. complete answer to those who contend for the gradual degeneration of the human species, that every babv born in the world is a, finer one that the last.-Dichzens' Nicholas Nickleby.