Maynard High School - Screech Owl Yearbook (Maynard, MA)

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THE SCREECH OWL 9 Our plan works on the principle that things mellow with age. This axiom, however, heretofore has not applied to jokes. Now, by my proposi- tion, a joke heard more than three times within the period of one week will be submitted to a committee of impartial experts. If the joke shows promise, it will be filed with others of its nature. For a period of ten years, the quip will be kept out of circulation, and comedians will be forbidden to use it. Don’t you see? This plan works on another old saying to the effect that, “Absence makes the heart grow fonder.” If this one doesn’t work, we have another alternative. If the lis- teners don’t grow fonder of it, they must have forgotten it. Good ! That’s just what we want. Here is how the scheme will work. Joke number 54897, division of mother-in-law jokes, will be with- drawn from its hibernation in the archives at Washington, and be sub- mitted to a select few comedians. The result will be most gratifying. The older generation will laugh heartily along with the younger generation, who have just heard it for the first time. Why will they laugh at an old joke? Why? Because they will have forgotten it, and if such is not the case, they will be so darn’ glad to hear it again after its absence that they will go into fits of hearty guffaws. Besides that, the venerable joke will have taken on an added zest as a re- sult of its long rest. The snappy come-back is a great institution. Let’s do all that is in our power to protect and preserve it. Be wise: Unionize. Join the Com- mittee for the Preservation of Old Jokes (CPOJ). — Robert Veitch, ’39. WHY? BECAUSE! Why do we choose to write topics on crime and its prevention ? Because gangster pictures are featured at nearly every moving picture theater, pictures that make crime prominent in an effort to prove that, in the end, “Crime Does Not Pay.” Because radio skits, such as the “Shadow” and “Gang Busters,” talk of fictitious — and real — stories of thieves, murderers, and kidnappers. Because “dime novels” and thrillers clutter up the magazine stands with stories of improbable, if not impos- sible, deeds of mad men lured by the desire for money, notoriety, and such material gains. Because our newspapers are full of stories of arrests being made because someone “was desperate, had no job, and needed money so he held up and robbed the proprietor of a store and was cleverly outwitted by the police- man on the beat. Because the comic strips, and most of you still enjoy reading them, con- tain stories of the brilliant feats of Dick Tracy, Dan Dunn, and (dare I mention him?) the Lone “Hi Yo, Silver” Ranger, for the benefit of Law and Order. Five “Becauses” have been given here, and I know there are many more. What man or woman, old or young, wouldn’t — doesn’t — sympathize with a modern Robin Hood like Charteris’ “Saint” or with Edgar Wallace’s “Four Just Men,” or with someone like Jimmie Dale or Bulldog Drum- mond? You tell me. — Jean Davis, ’41.

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WHAT IS OUR ATHLETIC FIELD GOING TO BE? The New York World’s Fair was built over a dump. There a beautiful spot has been created from waste- land. I wonder what kind of future our athletic field holds for itself. Is it going to be the site for the next World’s Fair? Alumni Field is a place where the boys of Maynard High School spend much of their time par- ticipating in various sports, such as football and track. When football and track were brought into existence for the boys of high school age, I am quite sure that they were used to keep boys occupied and off the streets in order to reduce the rate of crime. I think I am justi- fied in saying that the boys of May- nard have quite a clean record as far as crime is concerned, but now let us return to the subject of Alumni Field. When we think of an athletic field, there is something that connects itself with our thought and makes us think of a park and a place of beauty. What do we behold when we enter our athletic field ? Yes, it’s a ghastly sight at that, in many ways, no better than a public dump. An athletic field is a place which should not only keep the boys off the street, but should build up strong bodies and sound minds. But is it healthful to be inhaling smoke from burning rubbish while trying to engage in athletic sports ? Many a time the fire department has had to be summoned to extinguish this burning rubbish, so that the spec- tators on a Saturday afternoon might enjoy a game of football. If an end run was to be staged, it was not enough trouble to try to dodge eleven players of the opposing team ; it was also necessary to dodge a multitude of flying papers blown across the field by the wind. At pres- ent, cans have been dumped within ten yards of the track. I am sure that the citizens of the town who use the dump do not realize how they mar a place that could be beautiful and beneficial to the young people of the town if the dump were done away with, not immediately of course, but as soon as possible. — Daniel O’Leary, ’39. Mu A PLAN FOR THE PRESERVATION OF OLD JOKES There is no greater menace facing the people of the United States today, than the over-worked joke. It is sur- prising that John L. Lewis hasn’t grabbed this great opportunity for making a little more coin by unioniz- ing the jokes on the principle that what we need are shorter hours and more higher-grade comedians.

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A BIOGRAPHY OF JOHN F. LOVELL There is an old tale about two children who searched all over the world for the Blue- bird of Happiness, only to find the bird at home. It is the same with all of us. We open our mouths and gape at the wondrous feats of far off heroes, and we often pro- claim, “What wouldn’t I give to know a per- son as plucky as that!” If we only opened our eyes and ears to the situations about us, I am sure we would find many heroes as great as those we read about in history books or even greater. For instance, do you know in our very vicinity there dwells a man who denies most vigorously that “life begins at forty”? For this man, life began in the sixties and has gone on and on. You may not know him personally, but if you have lived in Maynard for any length of time, you must have had an occasion for being thankful to him. I speak, of course, of Mr. John F. Lovell, President of the Lovell Bus Lines. I shall not tell you very much of his boy- hood. That in itself would demand more space than the Screech Owl now contains. I must, however, show you how his determina- tion even then was remarkable. Born at Plymouth, Massachusetts, Sep- tember 28, 1858, Mr. Lovell did not have the advantage of going to school long, for at the age of nine, he was forced to leave school and seek employment. This industrious fel- low found work in a nail factory in Ply- mouth. A seventy-one-cent-a-day job wasn’t much pay for an ambitious boy, but after all, what kind of a salary can one expect to get at the age of nine? At eleven, he left the factory, and went to his grandfather’s farm in Carver. While at the farm, he started a little business of his owm selling milk. Mr. Lovell used to ask his uncle to make out his customers’ bills. One day, however, his uncle said to him, “You ought to be ashamed of yourself; a boy fifteen years old not being able to read or write.” That statement hurt John’s feelings, but he soon realized that it was true, and some- thing ought to be done about it. He couldn’t attend school, but did the next best thing by gathering whatever books he could obtain and by beginning to learn how to read and write. A short time afterwards he was mak- ing out his own bills. John stayed at this farm until he was twenty-one years old, and then he moved back to Plymouth. There he secured employ- ment in a shoe factory and increased his salary from $1.00 to $4.00 a day. At 24, he married and moved to Ashland, where he worked in a shoe factory; later, with the aid of his wife, he opened a restaurant. The shoe factory, failing because of a depression, made it necessary to seek work again, and this time he secured a job in Woburn with an insurance company working on a com- mission basis, and receiving $15.00 to $25.00 a week. Speaking of his experiences during this period Mr. Lovell remarked: “The people I took the premiums from needed the money more than I did.” While living in Woburn, he decided to go into the theatrical business, for his weekly salary with the insurance company was not sufficient to support him and his wife. The result was that he opened theaters in Beverly and Gloucester. He was becoming prosperous in the business, but soon “old man depression” came once again, and he lost these too. But now it is time to begin telling you of the remarkable part of his life. I refer to it as being “life begins at sixty-one.” For it is from this age that Mr. Lovell’s success story begins. At this age, he found himself penniless. Most men would be thinking of retirement and pensions, if any. But not he! He was determined “to be successful.” With only a Model T Ford to his name and enough money to buy four gallons of gas, he started a taxi-cab business. John Lovell described the Ford as being “an ancient looking old trap,” but if it could be returned to him to- day, it would be of great value. Gradually, his cab made enough money; thus he was able to add more to his business. One day the Mayor of Woburn asked him to establish a bus line from Woburn to Reading. Mr. Lovell, foreseeing a great chance of expansion, agreed immediately. He did not have much capital, but because of faith stored in him by the Reo Company of Boston, he was given busses on credit terms.