Maynard High School - Screech Owl Yearbook (Maynard, MA)

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The Wise Old Owl would Mke to know : 1. How long “Gutsy” has had the liking for chorus girls. 2. Why Jim Mullin sat on the church steps the night of the Junior sleigh ride? 8. Why the Seniors are in such a rush to pay their class dues? 4. If “Simmie” Seder really likes “Lillies” ? 5. If Joe Baccaro ever misses a dance. 6. If Bernard Dawson reads “War Stories” in every class. 7. If “Glicky” could lick Mullin. (With his tongue.) 8. Why a post office isn ’t installed in M. H. S. so the students won’t have to go out of their way to deliver their notes? 9. If Elinor Glyn ever met Ellen Swanson ? 10. If “Hank” is following the foot- steps of “Pie”? 11. If Mr. Lerer has to “count noses” on his hiking trips ? 12. Why “Red” Lanigan is so cold? 18. If “Glicky” and “Tinker” listened to the recent talk on “Safety” ? 14. What happened to all the German hair cuts? 15. If Cecelia Nelson has, as yet, found a cure for “insomonia”. 16. How low the treasury of the A.A. is? 17. Who said that M. H. S. is “The House of a Thousand Thrills?” 18. What Juniors would rather walk than ride on a sleigh ride? 19. If anyone knows whether Sidney McCleary is really sophisticated or not? 20. If Tonnuzzo ever gets hoarse from talking? 21. If a certain senior girl “made”’ the photographer? 22. If “Kate” Coughlan believes in “safety in numbers?” One of our fair students may never get as far as having her name in elec- tric lights on Broadway, but at least she has started by having her initials on every light post in town. Of all the tales we’ve heard of absent-mindedness, we’ve yet to hear of the absent-minded carpenter who hit a hammer with his thumb. After careful thought and due con- sideration the Wise Old Owl has selected as: Best Boy Dancer Joe Baccarro Best Girl Dancer. Isabelle Donahue Most Silent Boy Tonnuzzo Most Silent Girl Peg Johnston Most Punctual Donat Gagne School Flapper. Mary Hanna School Sheik “Tony” Smalski Most Industrious “Soko” Typical “Frosh” Robert Hartin Typical Senior Lillian Sullivan Star Football Player Dennis Farnell Most Forward Barbara Stockbridge

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THE SCREECH OWL » “Brown and Gold”, Haverhill High, Haverhill, Mass. “Dovertones”, Dover High School, Dover, Mass. “The Parrot”, Rockland High, Rock- land, Mass. AS OTHERS SEE US Your departments are all very good and it is hard to pick the best. You certainly have some good authors in your school. “The Academy Student” Congratulations on a most excellent magazine ! Every feature deserves commendation. “The Beacon” JOKES FROM EXCHANGES Although Mary’s head is a foot long, she doesn’t use it as a rule. “How did you like that ‘Barcarole’ at the musicale last night ?” “I didn’t stay for refreshments.” Pedestrian to truck-driver : “Where’s your horn and why don’t you use it?” Truck-driver: “Meester, I no needa de horn. De fronta my car she say ‘Dodge’.” “So you asked Geraldine to marry you?” “Yes, but I didn’t have any luck. She asked me if I had any prospects.” “Why didn’t you tell her about your rich uncle?” “I did — Geraldine is my aunt now.” Boy — “Have you an opening for a bright, ambitious boy?” Boss — “Yes, and don’t slam it when you go out l” HUMOR AND OTHERWISE FROM EXCHANGES Your Rest Friend Will Tell You “Mary, I’ve wanted for ages to talk to you, like this, alone. I have some- thing to say to you. Will you — er — will you — oh, I don’t know how to say it. I realize that I’m in to ask you to — uh, er — well. I’ve known you ever since we were kids together. You won’t deny that there has always been a certain relationship between us and I know that, but who am I to ask a girl like you to — pull up her stock- ings? But, honestly, they’re sloppy as the dickens!” “The Golden Rod” The Study Room Teacher There is a frown upon her brow For who can ever tell The way to make them quiet down When they hear that second bell? Her voice that once was sweet and low Is now both harsh and loud From reprimanding dreamers, who Build castles in each cloud. Her golden hair is streaked with gray For this thought preys on her mind: When they choose prize winners Will my room be way behind ? Alas! What fate’s in store for her Poor victim of the herd That whispers, giggles and writes notes ’Till that dear last bell is heard? “The Cony Cue” Virginia Collins, ’32.

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THE SCREECH OWL 31 “WOULDN’T IT BE TOO BAD” If Jakie were Hits instead of Swatz. If Annie were Black instead of White. If Deane were Minister instead of Priest. If Edith were Ireland instead of France. If Julia were Hang instead of Lynch. If Howard were Knitting instead of Weaving. If Catherine were Sneezelin instead of Coughlin. If Pileeki were Loser instead of Victor. If Ellen were Duckson instead of Swanson. If Alden were Old instead of Young. Edith R. France, ’31. w. o. o. Whose Lips Cannot Smile I’ve stood quite enough of your torture, I’m not going to stand any more, I’d like to put forward this thought : your Behavior has gotten me sore. Whenever you’ve said you would want me I’ve been at your side right on time. You pick on me always and taunt me, Though none is more faithful than I’m. You gaze on my pictures you’ve taken And treasure them fondly, I know; But soon you will find you’re for- saken. You’ll see me no more when I go. This mouth that I once thought of giving To you I am taking away. The dull grind with you’s not worth living, I’d much rather slowly decay. I’d much rather get some enjoyment From life which is painful at best — Dentist, listen, your term of employ- ment Is finished. My mouth needs a rest. THE DAILY GAWKIES MONDAY LADIES’ MAN Starring Thomas Lannigan TUESDAY GIRLS DEMAND EXCITEMENT with Catherine Coughlan Jeannette Gruber Dorothy Marsden Eleanor Lawson Helen Scerzen Elma jokela Directed by R. P. Sawyer WE DNESDAY SULO HINTSA in LITTLE CAESAR also Dennis Farnell Deane Priest in THE LEATHER PUSHERS THURSDAY Mark Newton Arvo Hankala “Stub” Staple Stanley Sokolowski in ASSORTED NUTS FRIDAY GOING WILD with Aili Hermanson Eero Wirkanen Added Attraction Prof. Robert Hartin Will Conduct an Experiment on “STEAM” SATURDAY VAUDEVILLE “MIKE” ZAPORESKIAN and his WEST END YANKEES With the Dancing Midgets Ellie Lawson — Peg Murray Dancing in Lobby — 8- 1 1 SUNDAY MEN ON CALL All-Star Cast Mary Hanna Mary Downey Laura Alberi Esther Elson Dorothy Burnham