Maynard High School - Screech Owl Yearbook (Maynard, MA)

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THE SCREECH OWL 29 Hippy : I say, darling, I have tickets for the theatre. Helen : Splendid. Fll start dressing. Hippy: Yes, do dear. They are for tomorrow. Alice : Nothing is ever lost through politeness. Alec: I don’t know about that. I lost a perfectly good seat in the sub- way that way. College man: Gee, I haven’t shaved for a week. High School boy: I haven’t shaved for sixteen years. Teacher: What does series mean? Student: I don’t know. Teacher: What does serial mean? Student: Oh! It’s a food.

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28 THE SCREECH OWL Bunny : I’ve brought this book back. Mother says it isn’t fit for me to read. Bookseller: I think your mother must be mistaken. Bunny : Oh, no, she isn’t ! I’ve read it through. Sczerzen: My poems will be read fifty years from now. Friend : Why, the editors won’t keep them that long, will they? Father: But Louise is too young to marry, young man. She’s just barely a Miss. Gilbert : She may seem that to you, but she’s a hit with me. Tynne: “I do so love soldiers. Oh! Pie, why are you not a son of Mars?” Pie: “Well, I’m doing my best to be her son-in-law, ain’t I?” “Why does the Professor have all those letters tacked on to his name?” “That shows that he got there by degrees.” A Freshman and a Sophomore run- ning opposite way struck each other. Soph: How you made my head ring. Frosh : That’s a sign it’s hollow. Soph: Didn’t yours ring? Frosh: No. Soph: That’s a sign its cracked. Art Instructor: “You have a won- derful talent for painting?” M. H. S. Girl: “How interesting? How can you tell?” Art Instructor: “I can see it in your face.” Torppa: Use your head coming up the stairs, Zaporeski. Zaporeski: I just washed it and don’t want to get it dirty again. Wilcox: Do you know the differ- ence between your girl and mine? Kulevitch: No, what’s the differ- ence? Wilcox: Well, my girl is a vision and yours is a sight. Foster: Would you drink out of a glass of water after a dog ? Weaving : No, because there wouldn’t be any left. Teacher: “Evelyn, use officious in a sentence.” Evelyn: “When Mary and John fell in the brook they called, ‘Oh fish us out.’ ” Judge: The speed limit sign read “Fifteen miles an hour.” College student: But how could I read it when I was going forty! “Children,” said a teacher, “be dili- gent and steadfast, and you will suc- ceed. Take the case of George Wash- ington. Do you remember my telling you of the great difficulty George Washington had to contend with?” “Yes, m’am,” said a little boy. “He couldn’t tell a lie.” Teacher: (to a 7-year-old) So you have broken off a tooth have you? How did you do it? 7-year-old: Oh, shifting gears on a lollipop. Fond Mother: My son has many original ideas, hasn’t he? Teacher: Yes, especially in spelling. Hippy: That’s some car you have! How many seasons has it seen? Alec: I don’t know exactly, but its had two falls and more than a dozen springs.

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THE LAUNDRY DOES IT BEST Laundry-washed clothes are cleaner MIDDLESEX FAMILY LAUNDRY TELEPHONE 400 MAYNARD, MASS. SHOES that add to your appearance ...at... Electric Appliances for the hot weather RICKLFS SHOE Heatproof China Toaster - $8.00 STORE Heatproof China Percolator $ 1 2.50 We carry just the right shoes to go with your clothes . J. A MacPHERSON Telephone 365 Note in particular our fine variety in sport shoes. Our prices are right . Next door to P. O. MAYNARD, MASS. LEDGARD’S NEWS STAND Our Circulating Library has ALL the LATEST BOOKS 2 CENTS A DAY When patronizing our advertisers, please mention “THE SCREECH OWL”