Mary Baldwin College - Bluestocking Yearbook (Staunton, VA)

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1 6 The Annual of III. There was a goodly company in the parlor of the old Southern mansion, for the Judge was to give a dining and the most distinguished members of the barw ere present. Leaving her guests deep in the discussion of Smith versus Peterson, Miss Fannie, the Judge ' s wife, slipped into the kitchen to give the final orders. Here Eve, the cook, sole monarch of the realm, was busi- ly engaged in preparing the feast. Proudly she lifted the large red-fish from the oven. Now look dar Miss Fannie, ain ' t she a bute? I jes ' tell yer wut, an ' I doan ' mean ter be braggish neider, dare ain ' t no nigger, doan ' kere whar she done been raised, wut kin cook a rade-fish like dat. It certainh ' is a success, Eve, but the gentlemen are wait- ing, so do hurry, there is no time for talk. Law, Miss Fannie, j ou sho ' ain ' t scusin ' me ob bein ' talkative ! and ' ou raised wid me too, an know I neber did spatiate none wen dare warn ' t time. De Jedge got ter hab ' is toddy yit, too. Well I ' m going in now, and you must be quick. All right. Miss Fannie. WardatAbum? and Eve look- ed out of the window in the direction of the woodpile. Just then litt ' e Tom ' s shrill voice was heard, Now, please. Uncle Abram, please tell us about Brother Rabbit and the Tar Baby ! ' ' Oh yas, said Eve, monkeyin wid dem worrelsome chil- lun agin. I clar ef he do git me flustrated, an ' make me lose my temper, I ' ll kill ' im dade. You Abum, Abum, come heah. Doan ' yer know de company am waitin ? You am sartinly a sassy nigger ter show yo ' respec ter de Jedge an ' Miss Fannie by settin ' on de woodpile gassin ' ter chillun w en dey am wait- in ' fer dey dinner. Doan ' do dat ! Deseheah taters got to be smashed fust. For Uncle Abram in his desire to make amends, had seiz- ed the fish and started for the dining room. Eve flew at him so suddenly that she .startled him, and stumbling, heup.set di.sh

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' J he Mary Bald7i ' in Seminary. i c About twelve o ' clock that night Uncle Dave came out of his cabin and slipped noiselessly down the road toward the fowl yard. I ' se gwine watch dem chickens fer Mars Tom, an ef I cotch dem rascally niggers dey ' ll be pow ' ful sorry — dar, dar ! Wut dat by de big coop ! Sho ' , hit am two niggers. I ' se got ' em now. I ' ll jes creep long soft like an pounce on ' em . ' ' He crept up behind the coop and recognized Hiram and his friend Joe. Uncle Dave started around to the front and Hiram saw him. Hi dar, Unc ' Dave, he cried seizing him, wut yer doin ' heah ? ' ' Lemme go, Hime, I ' se done cotch yer ! Cotch who, cotch me? Oh no, Uuc ' Dave, I ' se done cotch you ! Wal ! yer doan ' steal does yer ? An heah yer come arter dese identical chickens yer spoke so feelin ' ly bout ! Wut yer talkin bout Hime ? I come ter perteck de chick- ens, an ' cotch you an Joe. Yas yer did ! Ain ' t Mars Tom sout me ter watch dis heah coop, and de fus ' man I cotch am you ! But I ain ' t gwine ter .steal, Uncle Dave in.sisted. ' ' Oh no, Mars Tom tole me ter bring de nigger wut I cotch ter him, said Hiram. Fer de Lawd ' s sake, Hime ! Yas, I hate ter do it but I reckon I ' m bleeged ter. ' Oh, Hime, doan ' tell Mars Tom I wuz arter his chick- ens. Uncle Dave, I respec ' s your gray bar, an ' I hates to ' spose yer, an ' I reckon I ' ll hab to gib in. But yermussn ' say nuf- fin ' bout it, kase it am er secret dat me an ' Joe am watchin ' de chickens, so if yer keeps your mouf shet you ' ll be all right. But be stremely careful an ' doan ' yer say nuffin ter Mars Tom, for den he will know yer wuz arter de chickens an ' me an Joe will get de blame fer not fotchin yer to him. And poor Uncle Dave believed him and went home great- I3 ' mortified, while Hiram and Joe guarded the chickens. The next morning nobody knew where two fine hens had gone.

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The Mary Baldwin Seminary. 17 fish and all upon the floor. Eve, in her anger, fell upon him with the broom and he would have received a severe beating indeed, had not the mistress of the house just then entered. Eve allowed poor Uncle Abram to get up, and after hasti- ly explaining the accident to Mi.ss Fannie began gathering up the bits of fish and arranging them in some kind of order. In the midst of the excitement, the Judge was heard coming, possibly to inquire the cause of the delay. Eve planted her- self in the doorway. Head him off, Miss Fannie she cried, faw de Lawd ' s sake, head de Jedge off ! So the Judge was warded off and the fish mended and made beautiful with fresh sprigs of parsley and more gravy, so that no one imagined what an unsightly mass it had been but ten minutes before. Tlie dining passed off without a flaw. Uncle Abram took care to keep out of his wife ' s way, and Eve was satisfied when she peeped in at the dining room door to see how ' dey tuk de turkey ' . I knows dey didn ' had nary nudder one like it afore, she said with a .satisfied grin. After the meal was over and the stately company had ad- journed to the library, Eve sent Uncle Abram to assist in the dining room and to put everything safely away. Now, Abum, go in dar an ' put dat turkey carcass up, so I kin make hash fer de Jedge ' s breakfast ' in de mornin ' . Yer done act once like yer been used ter wukin ' fer po ' white trash. Now go show yer breedin ' . Yer be ceedenly pertickler wid dat carcass too, kase if dare is one thing de Jedge do ' preciate, it am de turkey hash wut dis heah nigger kin make. Uncle Abram was evidently angry at his wife ' s rebuke but to face her openly was out of the question — he would nev- er have dared to do it. With a quiet grin, he made his w ay to the dining room, secretly plotting his revenge. In a little while, he disappeared, and after looking for him in vain, Eve ran in very much excited, Fer de law ' s sake, Miss Fannie, wut yer reckon dat nig- ger done now? Jes ' let ' im come back heah, an I ' ll break his ole hade for him ! Why, Mi.ss Fannie, Abum done gone scap-