Mary Baldwin College - Bluestocking Yearbook (Staunton, VA)

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' J he Mary Bald7i ' in Seminary. i c About twelve o ' clock that night Uncle Dave came out of his cabin and slipped noiselessly down the road toward the fowl yard. I ' se gwine watch dem chickens fer Mars Tom, an ef I cotch dem rascally niggers dey ' ll be pow ' ful sorry — dar, dar ! Wut dat by de big coop ! Sho ' , hit am two niggers. I ' se got ' em now. I ' ll jes creep long soft like an pounce on ' em . ' ' He crept up behind the coop and recognized Hiram and his friend Joe. Uncle Dave started around to the front and Hiram saw him. Hi dar, Unc ' Dave, he cried seizing him, wut yer doin ' heah ? ' ' Lemme go, Hime, I ' se done cotch yer ! Cotch who, cotch me? Oh no, Uuc ' Dave, I ' se done cotch you ! Wal ! yer doan ' steal does yer ? An heah yer come arter dese identical chickens yer spoke so feelin ' ly bout ! Wut yer talkin bout Hime ? I come ter perteck de chick- ens, an ' cotch you an Joe. Yas yer did ! Ain ' t Mars Tom sout me ter watch dis heah coop, and de fus ' man I cotch am you ! But I ain ' t gwine ter .steal, Uncle Dave in.sisted. ' ' Oh no, Mars Tom tole me ter bring de nigger wut I cotch ter him, said Hiram. Fer de Lawd ' s sake, Hime ! Yas, I hate ter do it but I reckon I ' m bleeged ter. ' Oh, Hime, doan ' tell Mars Tom I wuz arter his chick- ens. Uncle Dave, I respec ' s your gray bar, an ' I hates to ' spose yer, an ' I reckon I ' ll hab to gib in. But yermussn ' say nuf- fin ' bout it, kase it am er secret dat me an ' Joe am watchin ' de chickens, so if yer keeps your mouf shet you ' ll be all right. But be stremely careful an ' doan ' yer say nuffin ter Mars Tom, for den he will know yer wuz arter de chickens an ' me an Joe will get de blame fer not fotchin yer to him. And poor Uncle Dave believed him and went home great- I3 ' mortified, while Hiram and Joe guarded the chickens. The next morning nobody knew where two fine hens had gone.

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14 The Anmial of of the young negroes on Belle Bend plantation, and he had as- sembled them for the purpose of delivering a lecture. Dem pecans am good, ain ' t dey, boys? Come off en de fines ' trees on de Bend. An Mars ' Tom gib ' em ter me— gib ' em ter me hissef ! Lots better dan ef I had bin so low as ter steal ' em. No, chillun, I ain ' t never stole nuffin in my life. Lawd, Unc ' Dave, how bout dem watermillions you ' se tole us ' bout? Wall now, Hime, I thought you wuz a boy ob comper- hension ! Dat time I tole you bout I jes ' tuk dem watermil- lions, I ain ' t stole em, jes tuk ' em an Mars ' Tom he hep ' d, .so dat wuz all right. Can ' t yer see de difFunce? White folks doan steal, no how. Wall, boys, ez I wuz sayin ' I ain ' t never stole, an hit am er solacious thought. Now dey hev ariz er mighty determental inflexion on de culled race in gineral, an on de poperlation ob de Bend in specialty. You hev heerd, boys, no mo ' dan heer ' d I am sartin, ' bout de trouble Mars Tom hev had lately wid his chickens? At this point the boys looked surprised and some of them very much hurt. No, chillun, I doan ' mean nothin ' pussonal. I knows dar ain ' t none er Mars Tom ' s niggers wut would steal his chick- ens. But I jes ' wish yer would tell dem niggers on Alder ' s place, when yer meet ' em in de road, ter keep out ' en Mars Tom ' s chicken coop. Sho ' we will Uucle Dave, said Hiram, and glancing in the box to make sure there were no more pecans, he proposed that the} ' go at once to ' warn dem niggers ter let dat chicken - coop erlone. ' ' Dat ' s right, boys, but doan ' get in no trouble, jes ' warn ' em in er quiet-like way. Good night, an fo ' yer go lem me gib yer dis advice — alius keep in de middle ob de road an ' doan ' sneak out in de lanes an breshes. Good night. As Uncle Dave closed the door, he chuckled to himself, Dem boys ain ' t got me fooled. Dey think I doan ' know who bin arter dem chickens, but I ' se fi;wine cotch ' em, see ef I doan ' .

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1 6 The Annual of III. There was a goodly company in the parlor of the old Southern mansion, for the Judge was to give a dining and the most distinguished members of the barw ere present. Leaving her guests deep in the discussion of Smith versus Peterson, Miss Fannie, the Judge ' s wife, slipped into the kitchen to give the final orders. Here Eve, the cook, sole monarch of the realm, was busi- ly engaged in preparing the feast. Proudly she lifted the large red-fish from the oven. Now look dar Miss Fannie, ain ' t she a bute? I jes ' tell yer wut, an ' I doan ' mean ter be braggish neider, dare ain ' t no nigger, doan ' kere whar she done been raised, wut kin cook a rade-fish like dat. It certainh ' is a success, Eve, but the gentlemen are wait- ing, so do hurry, there is no time for talk. Law, Miss Fannie, j ou sho ' ain ' t scusin ' me ob bein ' talkative ! and ' ou raised wid me too, an know I neber did spatiate none wen dare warn ' t time. De Jedge got ter hab ' is toddy yit, too. Well I ' m going in now, and you must be quick. All right. Miss Fannie. WardatAbum? and Eve look- ed out of the window in the direction of the woodpile. Just then litt ' e Tom ' s shrill voice was heard, Now, please. Uncle Abram, please tell us about Brother Rabbit and the Tar Baby ! ' ' Oh yas, said Eve, monkeyin wid dem worrelsome chil- lun agin. I clar ef he do git me flustrated, an ' make me lose my temper, I ' ll kill ' im dade. You Abum, Abum, come heah. Doan ' yer know de company am waitin ? You am sartinly a sassy nigger ter show yo ' respec ter de Jedge an ' Miss Fannie by settin ' on de woodpile gassin ' ter chillun w en dey am wait- in ' fer dey dinner. Doan ' do dat ! Deseheah taters got to be smashed fust. For Uncle Abram in his desire to make amends, had seiz- ed the fish and started for the dining room. Eve flew at him so suddenly that she .startled him, and stumbling, heup.set di.sh