Marple Newtown High School - Memories Yearbook (Newtown Square, PA)

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BEDLAM NEWS SCIENTIST ANNOUNCES NEW DISCOVERIES 1 lenry O NeiU. who made his place in the scientific world by crossing a street with a wagon, disclosed his latest inventions last night at Flexall Institute. The outstanding scientific reve- lations were an alarm clock with half a bell, so when two people room together, it only wakes one of them, and a cellophane mat- tress so that old maids won ' t have to get out of bed to find out who’s underneath it. NEW SHOW AT THE SEEMORE Bill Landrum, known to all America as the K.ing of Bur- lesque and as the editor of Sloppy Stories, announces a new show at the Seemore. Starting tonight the feature attraction will be Marcia Smith, the famous fan dancer. Miss Smith is, of course, accompanied by her mother. Also appearing on the bill is Mac” MacIntyre and his Broomall Broadcasters, direct from the Greasy Spoon on the Pike. TAP DANCER RETURNS FROM EUROPE Dottie Ewing, petite tap dancer, was met by a crowd of admirers as her ship docked today. Dottie has just returned from Europe where she danced before the crowned heads of the Continent. She was especially feted by the Crown Prince of Dementia, who is said to be fol- lowing her on the next boat. Dottie denied this, but her com- panion and secretary. Miss Cook, knowingly winked. CROONER MAKES DEBUT TONIGHT Rancid Honeybottom will join the coast- to-coast hookup of the Brown Better Bunk Company’s Broadcast. The crooner will be personally welcomed by the President of Brown’s Better Bunk Company. A. Brown, the well-known financier. Both men are alumni of Marple-Newtown. Mr. Brown got his idea for Better Bunks while trying to I catch up on sleep in the seats at M.-N. Rancid I loneybottom first started to croon in the M.-N. operettas. He was then known as Ken Burgess. WELL KNOWN SCREEN STAR ARRIVES IN NEW YORK Ruth Russell, I lollywood platinum blonde, arrived in New York today for a brief holiday. Miss Russell was accompanied by that exponent of sex appeal, Don Chicko, her leading man. She vehemently denied all ru- mors of a romance with Don Chicko, who will be remembered as Chick Wurster, a Mar ple- Newtown alumnus. Miss Rus- sell ' s press agent. Bill Hancock, j who is largely responsible for her sudden rise to fame, an- nounced that the star ' s next picture will be “Nicotine Lane,” 1 a sequel to Tobacco Road.” BIG WRESTLING MATCH Dickie Dickinson, known as I the left-handed man who keeps his money in his right-hand I pocket, has become a fight pro- moter. 1 le arranged the match between George Gaulstein, the champ, and Bill Kelly, the Irish Challc.n;;er. Gaulstein is the favorite, because in his own words, he says, “I’m sure to I win; I’ve been throwing the i bull since I was in high school.”

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BEDLAM NEWS DEBUTANTE PUBLISHES BOOK Miss Dorothea Martin, young socialite, has recently had pub- lished the most talked-of-book of the year, called “How Shall I Tell Mother?” which is said to have caused great consternation in literary circles. Miss Martin says she planned her book while driving his Plymouth and blames her many encounters with offi- cers of the law upon her creative genius, which is apparent only when she is listening to Benny Goodman and doing sixty. TWINS WIN PERFECT BABY CONTEST Little five-year-old Millie and Eddie Bonsall were the joint winners of the Burpee Butter- milk Contest. The judges de- cided to break down and award a double prize of two loving cups. Mrs. Bonsall, who was Mildred Young, M.-N. ’36, and her husband, a well-to-do Broomall merchant, recalled that when they were in high school they won a large silver cup, known in those days as a necking cup. Like father like son, like mother like daughter. NOTED PROFESSOR LEC- TURES AT MARPLE-NEW- TOWN P. T. A. Professor John Courtney, Head of the Chemistry Depart- ment of Hale University, was the guest speaker last night at the Marple-Newtown Parent- Teachers’ Association. He spoke on his recently published book, “Not Dead But Sleeping,” or “Interrupted Dreams.” Before entering the field of practical chemistry. Professor Courtney was head of the Mathematics Department at Flexall Institute in Philadelphia. GOVERNESS OF CHILD ACTRESS KIDNAPPED Miss Anna Ford, governess of Surly Pimple, the child actress, disappeared suddenly and com- pletely last Monday night. No word has been received, but it has been reported that a mys- terious phone call was received by Surly’s mother, the former Betty Campbell. Mrs. Pimple’s secretary. Miss Klodarska, de- nied knowledge of any such phone call. FIRST WOMAN PRESIDENT INAUGURATED Miss Priscilla Reedy, who was led into office yesterday as the first Woman President, says she owes her success to her campaign speeches which were the same ones she used as a girl in high school when she hadn’t prepared her lesson. Her cabinet mem- bers include: Miss Jeanette Wallace, who will direct Federal Female Athletics, and Miss Nelda Michener, who will pub- lish a short booklet on “How Every Girl Can Be An ‘A’ Student.” COMEDY TEAM ENDS LONG RADIO CONTRACT Simpson and Marston have just ended one of the longest radio contracts. Millie Simpson is the girl who began at Marple- Newtown by worrying Grade Allen, but Miss Simpson has become famous for her own brand of comedy. She still thinks love is when two people chew the same piece of gum and that a straw is something you drink soda water through two of them. Her partner is returning to his first love — the classics. ■=il 12

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WASHINGTON MEMORIES . . day had arrived! Wednesday morning an orange and black bus and a friendly driver were waiting for us. Everyone was delighted to receive a rose or carnation from Mr. Russell. Soon we were off waving hands and shouting to our faithful teacher, Mr. Harvey, and our other friends. At Cono- wlngo we were awed by huge turbines and generators. Arriving at Annapolis we lunched at Carvel Hall. We all enjoyed looking around the beautiful grounds of the Naval Academy. The midshipmen ' s dress parade was fascinating. The precision and rhythm held our attention. Then dinner at the Lafayette and on to the Congressional Library where it seems that Richard was so interested that he got lost between the leaves of one of the larger books. We then went to the Metropolitan Theatre where we saw “Mr. Deeds Goes to Town (but you can ' t prove it by us). Thursday we visited the Bureau of Printing and Engraving. Then we con- tinued on to the Pan-American Building which represents most of the countries of North and South America. The White House was very Interesting. The Washington Monument came next on our list. Who will ever forget those steps? A few were not fond of the “drop” so decided to walk down as well as up. In the Capitol we were shown the Important rooms by a very interesting guide. After lunch we were driven to the Lincoln Memorial. Its simplicity, so be- fitting the man to whom it was dedicated, was quite impressive. After leaving Mount Vernon we stopped at the airport where eight of the nobler members of our class took a ride in one of the planes. That night we took a boat ride on the Potomac. After breakfast on Friday, the all-important business of getting our pictures taken was attended to and the rest of the morning was spent in the National Museum and the Smithsonian Institute. Then we drove through the residential and the embassy sections of the city, St. Alban’s Cathedral, Arlington Cemetery, Lee Mansion, the Natlona ' Amphitheatre, and the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier. John begged to stay at the Zoo, but they didn’t need any duplicates. We spent the evening at Glen Echo Park. Ruth or Dorothea can assure you that we had fun on the return from there. Saturday morning we could do what we wanted. When it came time to leave, Courtney was no where to be found. We visited several other buildings and returned about two hours later and there he was, grinning sheepishly. We kept close tabs on our “wandering boy” while we went through the Franciscan Monastery. On the way home we played “Under the Sheets” and there was a continual buzzing and singing until we reached home with suitcases somewhat heavier than what they were on Wednesday. We wish to extend our sincere thanks to Miss Pierce, our faithful and capable chaperon for the successful and pleasant trip. Page Fourteen