Manlius High School - Mirror Devil Yearbook (Manlius, IL)

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Thus ended our tour through the United States. We considered ourselves very lucky indeed to meet all of our former class-mates. How differently some had turned out to what we had thought. But Fate always plays such tricks upon us and it cannot be helped. But what a trick it had played on Alfaretta and me, when we were both made “old maids.” We in turn played a trick upon Fate when we did not become sour old maids, out of sorts with the world, and living all by ourselves in a great, dark, haunted house, with no friends except a parrot, cat, and dog. We became bachelor girls instead. We traveled, studied, took part in all social functions and enjoyed life thoroughly. M. A. ’23. WANTED. Instructions how to drive a Ford..............Lester. A man nearer my own age........................Prudy. A mustache that won’t come off...............Snorkey. A body guard ..................................Mabel. A theme and an eye opener........................Leo. Grammar without slang...........................Viva. A dancing teacher ..........................Arminnie. A gum parker ....................................Don. WHAT’S THE USE? Of making Lester throw his gum away—he’ll have a new stick to-morrow. Of argueing—they won’t believe you. Of worrying—it never was worth while. Of taking exams—you’ll flunk just the same. Of Mrs. Glassburn trying to teach English in all her classes—we don’t use good English anyway. Of STUDYING—can’t remember it over one night’s sleep. ........Aw, what’s the use? COULD YOU IMAGINE? Ernest with a mustache; ‘No exams’ to write; ‘Frosty’ hunting a date; ‘Verdin’ as an artist; ‘Stofer’ studying; ‘Mabel’ not giggling; ‘Doc’ not studious; ‘Dinty’ without a girl; ‘Don’ not being an all-star with the.; ‘Viva’ not whispering; ‘Peg’ keeping her mouth shut; ‘Mr. Larson’ at movies with ‘Miss Perry’; Harold D. as grandpa; ‘Rosina’ marrying a Frenchman; ‘Arnold A.’ as a professor; Leo as a janitor. Pat D.: “'Fhe only way to get to Heaven is to work your passage.” Ruby M.: “How far do you think you’ll get?”

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20 THE ALARM 1923 Mae J.: “The night that Arthur and I became engaged, he reminded me of a baseball player on a wet field.” Friend: “How was that?” M ae: “He slipped on the diamond!” Viva (in music store) Perry W. (the clerk) fellow.” “Have you ‘Kissed Me in the Moonlight’?” “Nope, I’m a new man here. Maybe it was the other Prof. Perry: “They say that people with opposite characteristics make the happiest marriages.” Dinty: “Yes; that’s why I’m looking for a girl with money.” M iss Perry: “What is the difference between a pill and a hill?” Art N.: “One is hard to get down, and the other is hard to get up.” Oh! What are the little boys made of ? Oh! What are the little boys made of? Cigarettes and fight, And stay up all night; That’s what the little boys are made of. Oh! What are the little girls made of? Oh! What are the little girls made of? Powder and paint, And lace ’til they faint; That’s what the little girls are made of. Exchange is a clever writer. He is credited with the following: “A clock has hands but no arms. The sea has arms but no hands.” Another old one: Strange. What? Night falls. Yes. But it doesn’t break. Well? Daybreaks. Indeed! But it never falls. Time is money; the watch is your purse; watch your purse. You cannot tell, in their youth, who are going to be leaders. We have had twenty-nine presidents of the United States. Nineteen were college men; among the ten, who were not college men, were Washington and Lincoln. H. L. M. of New Mexico is strong for the euphony of Spanish poetry and gives an example: O, Santa Maria—Mate mi tia—Y come le fria—Sin mantequilla. But as somebody so understandingly said—it don’t mean nothing. Translated into business English the verse reads: Oh, Holy Mary—Kill my aunt—And eat her cold—without butter. WET MEASURE. Two pints, one quart; two quarts, one fight; one fight, two cops; two cops, one judge; one judge, thirty days. Love is like an onion: You taste it with delight, And when it’s gone, von wonder Whatever made you bite.—Shorty.