Lucy Webb Hayes National Training School - Gleam Yearbook (Washington, DC)

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THE GLEAM If there again should be a Hood For refuge hither fly, For if the world be all submerged This book would still be dry. Starrie linstructing her little brother how to be polite when out in OOIIIIJRIIYZJ Today we are going out for dinner and if they have chicken and ask whether you prefer the light or dark meat, you must say, 'I like both and will take eitherlf' Time comes for the little fellow to make his decision and'-, he, upon being asked, makes this reply: I like either and will take both. Miss Hebrew: Miss Morrison, I can't go on duty today? Miss Morrison: Why, Miss Hebrew?,' Miss Hebrew: I don't feel wellf' Miss Morrison: 'Where donlt you feel well ?', Miss Hebrew: On duty. . Miss Quick fto Miss Spohnh : Do you take many magazines in your home ? Miss Spohn: Yes, we take three at Club rates-one dad does not like, one mother does not like and one no one will read-but we got them all for 5'B7.00. V Catherine Frey fpreaching her first funeral servicel: This member has been a corpse of this church for forty years. Martha Barner: I wish someone would explain to me why it is that a red cow can eat green grass and give white milk which makes yellow butter. Miss Sweet: VVait until you study Mendel's Law, Martha. Martha: Suppose you tell me since you study that. Miss Sweet: I cannot tell you for when I came. to Mendel's Law I stopped studying. Miss Didget fin Dramatic Art Class, making her first entrancel stumbles over a chair and then asks: 'fMiss Decker, do I come in this way? Martha Barner: IVhat is a College ? Mildred Sweet: A College is human hot-house specializing in the sheltered raising of individuals who would be normal if left alone? Ki Miss Condy is a.tl1ankful soul VVhenever she is able, One day she asked a' blessing On a. very empty table? Miss Martin: Do you want 'Right Living' this week ? Miss Quick: No, I donlt need it. Miss Decker in Church History class: We can surely clean up the Eastern Church by tomorrow. A ' If you walk in your sleep be sure to take carfarc to bed with you. Miss Crist: Hey! Miss Eckman: VVhat?', Miss Crist: Just wanted to tell you that you have two more hours to sleep. l74l 'C

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THE GLEAM , 4 r y ' ' -I Q . A 'A ' '.' 1' . - T QW' rvigw E tm' mE ' .1 ::?f:? .1 S 'N A i ' 1412 f., . . A . X Y. 4, yn' A, l, k f S A f X. r . 5. nhl' ' xx f g ,', . . . -0. :. 5 '.' 1 X .:q ..l HT. -YJ ' g 1' I , I M yr x ' 0 :Seb ' U ,LW WX Q nj H K El! :tk . Ek 3- A . Social Service Worker fpointing to a large building: :That house belongs to Eleanor Glynn. Luella Didget: Pardon me, but is she an old A. C. case? Miss Boat: Miss Hibbard, Why are the days longer in summer than in winter? Miss llibbard: The heat of the sun expands them. Trafiic Oiiicer to Miss Allen: As soon as I saw you come around the bend I said to my- self, 'Forty-five, at least'.', Miss Ellen: Oiiicer, you are mistaken. ltis this hat that makes me look so oldlv And then thoreis Mildred Showalter who got a shoe shine and then remembe1'ed that she had her roommate's shoes on. Miss Ellen urging the girls to hike more: Girls, when I was your age I thought noth- ing of taking a. ten-mile hike? Girls: Neither do we, Miss Ellen? Miss Boat fmaking an assignment in History cf Educationlz You two girls be ready to report on these men. Miss Stone: Why, Miss Boat, there are three men and only two of us girls? Miss Roat: Don,t worry about that, Miss Stone, that is just the way life goes? Dot Eckman lin. Social Case classl: Miss Ross, what would you do if you were left in a station with a. child who was lost? Miss Ross: Oh, feed it bananas until someone called for it. Brown Culp: lt is. ' ' Tommy: lt isn't.,' Brown Culp: nl know it is. Mrs. Brubaker says it is, and if she says it is, it is, even if it isn't. Did you hear about the two taxicabs colliding and 30 Scotchmen being injured? Found in the back of Mrs. CIICCVCIJS Spanish hook: Life is real, Life is earnest But it might be 1no1'e sulrlinee lf we were not kept so busy Studying Spanish all the time. All the people dead who wrote it All the people dead who spoke it, All the people die who learn it, Blessed death, they earn it. l73l

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THE GLEAM Miss Spohn: When I get to l1eave11 I am going to ask Tennyson if he wrote all those poems? A Alta: 4'What if he isn't there?i' Miss Spohn: Then you ask him. I have always been religiously inclined, said the oyster as it slid down the minister's throat, but I never dreamed I would enter the clergy. '1 he size of a. man is determined these days by what he owes. And then there is the absent minded professor who had the students write the examina- tion questions while he answered them? Miss Decker fin Religious Classy: 'lYe get the devil from Persiaf, Miss Gordon: You should put your hands over your ll'1Ol1tll when you yawn. Bonnie: 4'VVhat? and get bit? Then there is the Scotchman who carried his date to the movies because babies in arms are admitted free. A Verna: What is that smell in the lil:rary?', Mrs. Cheever: It,s the dead silence they keep there. Helen: How long does it take you to dress inthe morning ? Sweetie: About half an hour. Helen: Only takes me ten niinutesf' Sweetie: I Wash. A Faculty member fdemonstrating with graphic outline on the blackboardl: Now watch the blackboard and I'll go through it again. Boss: Well, did you read the letter I sent you?,' Mildred Sweet: Yes, sir: I read it inside and outside. On the inside it said, 'You are fired,' and on the outside it said, 'Return in five days,' so here I am. Autoist to Mechanic: 'tDo you have something to stop knocking ? Mechanic: Certainly. ' Autoist: Well, will you kindly pour a gallon down my wife's throat ? Do you know that- The place for the knocker is outside the door? Truthfulness in work is as much in demand as truthfulness in speech? The faculty will miss thc seniors next year? Rust Hall has a big day each year-BAZAAR DAY ?-no joke. Procrastination is the thief of time? A boost is better than a kick? Character is better than gold? - To help is better than to shirk? To do is better than to wish? Patience is better than worry? Frances Calkins fto hubby, apologexticallyl : 'CI took the recipe for this cake right out of the cookbook. Husband ftactfullyl : You did quite right, darling. It never should have been put in. E751