Lowe High School - Towers Yearbook (Windsor, Ontario Canada)

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T HE TOWERS Page Thirty-Three Wit and Wisdom . . . (Continued from Pane 32) me Clean, Wife! Aren ' t you ashamed, the judge asked the man, to have your wife support you by taking in washing?” “Yes, I am. Your Honor, lie replied. But what can l do? She ' s too ignorant to do any¬ thing better.” Marriage Is One Undarned Thing After Another Marriage is an institution of learning. But anywhere else a man could learn faster. The husband loses his bachelor ' s degree, And his wife acquires a Master ' s. Shaggy Skunk— Mama skunk was worried because she never could keep track of her two children. They were named ' In and Out , and when¬ ever In was in. Out” was out, and if Out was in, In was out. One day she called Out in to her and told him to go out and bring In in. So “Out” went out and in no time at all he brought “In in. “Wonderful! said Mama Skunk. “How. in all this great forest .could you find “In” in so short a time? It was easy, said Out”. In stinct. O Promise Me! I tel! you. the old lady was saving firmly to the bellboy, I will not have this room. I ' m not going to pay good money for a closet with a folding bed. If you think that just because I ' m from the country ... Get in. lady, get in. the bellboy inter¬ rupted wearily. “This isn ' t your room. It ' s the elevator. Which recalls the fat lady who wedged herself in the bus and fumbled for her purse in her coat pocket to pay her fare. She struggled and struggled, and a man standing next to her suddenly handed her a nickel. Take this, lady, he said unhappily, “and pay your fare, fm getting tired of you buttoning and unbuttoning my suspender buttons.” Roc k-a-bye-Baby— Hushabye, my babies. Your father ' s in some alley. Waiting at a stage door For a Betty, Sue. or Sally; Do not cry, my babies. If you bear a deafening boom. It will only be your mamma Socking papa with a broom, Toast by Herb Loon— I drink to your health when I ' m with you. 1 drink to your health when alone, I drink to your health so gosh-darned much. I ' m afraid I ' m losing my own. (Continued on Next Page ) Compliments H.S.A1ERS0IM0NS LIMITED FUNERAL AND AMBULANCE SERVICE Day Phone or Phone 4-4712 Night 4-4792 r, ? STERLING CONSTRUCTION COMPANY. Ltd. • READY MIX CONCRETE CONCRETE BLOCKS • 2494 SANDWICH STREET EAST WINDSOR. ONTARIO

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Page Thirty-Two THE TOWERS W it and Wisdom By STELLA WENDECK and ANNE SAFFRAN Sillygism— An appointment is a date. A date is a sticky fruit. A sticky fruit is a prune. ' A prune is something full of wrinkles. And something full of wrinkles is too darned old. So please be so good as to cancel my appointment. Lapides, Dot Sot— Mr. Lapides was discussing his daughter s impending graduation. “Choo-Choo, lie said paternally to her, if you come out foist in dc whole class, I’m goink to give you a prasent. What kind prasent, papa?” asked Choo- Choo. “A prasent,” said her papa. “Well,” he said, “a trinket. “What kind of trinket? “A trinket, that ' s all!” She said. Show me! So Lapides gave it to her. Why, papa,” she said, “that s a bottle of Coca-Cola.” “So,” Lapides answered, trinket. ' Ode on Oils— Cod liver Will deliver; But castor Is faster. Baboon Croon— On the lagoon shines the moon. For it’s June. Lovers spoon. No, you goon, it ' s not noon. It ' s time for making love Under twinkling stars above. From the shadow of a dune, An ape lover sings this tune. Let ' s listen to this baboon croon . . . DETROIT TECH DAY AND EVENING SCHOOL Degree Courses In College of Commerce: Accountancy. Business Administration, Real Estate. Secretarial Science. College of Engineering: Industrial, Chemical, Mechanical, Electrical, Architectural College of Pharmacy: Day Course 3,000 pharmacists needed annually less than 1,000 available. College of Liberal Arts: Arts and Science. Liberal Arts. SHORT TERM AND REFRESHER COURSES (CREDIT and NON-CREDIT) DETROIT INSTITUTE OF TECHNOLOGY 303 Downtown YMCA Bldg. Grand Circus Park RAndolph 6126 1 Compliments of [ Vi. Eckle eckle, ookle ookle Chocka, cheeka, check. Glitter, chatter, what’s the matter.- Don ' t you want to neck? I ' m so burble eeple. just like people I don ' t know how to start But you ' re the hunky punky little monkey Closest to my heart. So yocka ehippa bocka clippa. Reet and double zoot. For eckle eckle, ookle ookle. rooty toot! Which means. Ah, your fodder ' s moustache! Nuts to You! The superintendent of a booby hatch noti¬ ced one of the star boarders pushing a wheel¬ barrow upside down. Why do you have it upside down? he asked the loony. You don ' t think I ' m crazy, do you?” was the reply. 1 pushed it right side up yesterday, and they kept filling it with gravel. (Continued on Next Page) Compliments of the CANADIAN BANK OF COMMERCE • Ottawa and Gladstone Branch WINDSOR. ONT.

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Page Thirty-Four T H E T O W E K S Wit and Wisdom . . . (Continued from Page 33 ) That’s Telling Him, Lady! A curb-cruising wolf drew up alongside a cute bobby soxcr and asked: Going my way, baby ? Said the bobby soxer: “No. I get a harp at the end of mine.” No, No, No! Which recalls the wolf of the woods who drove a gal out into the bosky places, turned off the motor and asked for a kiss. She shook her head for a half hour before he discovered she had her nose caught in the windshield wiper. Questions! Questions! 1, Why do you suppose a train never sits down? Becausa it has a tender behind. £ What animals do most ladies keep in their bedrooms ? Mules. .5. Why is a w ' ise boy like a pin? Because his head prevents him from going too far. 4. What flowers do you wear all year round? Tulips (two-lips). 5. What has a foot at each end and one in the middle ? A Yardstick. 6. How can you prove that there is no difference between 1 and 10? Naught is the difference. 7. One morning a boy couldn’t find his trou¬ sers so w r hat did he do? He raced around the room until he was breathing in small pants. 8. What shows that your father is lazier than you are? Because he is longer in bed. 9. Does- a train have ears? Yes, it has engine-eers. 10. Why does a girl tie ribbons in her hair? To get beaux (bows). - + - Apologies . . . We offer our apologies to those who wrote articles which are absent from The Towers. We regret that it was impossible to find space for everything. Thanks for your generosity. The EDITORS. Announcement On or about May 1. we will move to our new permanent location downtown—the second and third floors of the Bank of Montreal Building, comer of Ouellette Ave. and Chatham St., one-half minute from the Bus Depot. REMODELLED INTERIOR ALL NEW MODERN EQUIPMENT EFFICIENT TEACHERS Windsor Business College Entrance 15 Chatham St. E, R. J. SERVICE, Principal Phone 3-4921