Long Island College Hospital - Lichonian Yearbook (Brooklyn, NY)

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,re T if 'Q A KNISH: His habits seem to be like those of the lowest animals. His chatterings show no resemblance to intelligent speech, such as ours, more like those of the brainless macaw. Apparently, he is totally without mental capabilities. IVIUTTAL: Those abbreviated, attenuated, fore-limbs, of what possible use can they be? For swinging from tree to tree, they are manifestly too weak. TUTTAL: Those elongated hind-limbs, so ugly to view! Why does he hide his feet in those awkward bindings? ZUTTAL: VVhy does he hide his body from view? Is it to conceal his lack of a cover- ing of hair? His must be an abominable, ill-smelling body, that he must bury it in artificial, unnatural coverings. KNISH: You can find faults and defects in this creature ad infinitum. lt would be difficult to find any enlightening tendencies, any! signs of refinement, such as is a product of our higher civilization. lVIAN: They walk and hold themselves very awkwardly. They have not even the grace of some of the other apes. fTIlki7lg notcsl: On the whole this species impresses me very unfavorably. lt is inconceivable that modern man can have any direct relationship with these things, even to have descended with them from a common branch. The gap between the human race and these apes is too great. On the whole, this creature creates a very poor impression. It is absurd to even consider a possibility of our having descended from such an inferior form. NVe shall have to look further for a missing link. QTlze wzse ones deliberate lllll0lL-Q tlzellzselves for Il short time.J ' MUTTAL fthe 5p0kL'S7l7lI7l, 1r1ldre.vsi11g the rabblelz This strange creature, the like of which we have never seen before, is evidently one of an inferior order of animals, whose habitat is unknown to us. He will be placed on exhibition so that you can all view him, and amuse yourselves. We will note his peculiar habits, attempt to analyze them, and we will study him with the purpose in view, of detecting any traces of intelligence, if any, there are in his make-up. Thus far, we have noted none. Afterwards, we will subject him to various scientific experiments, and note his reactions. You need have no qualms as to inflicting useless cruelties on helpless animals, since it is all in the advancement of science. Especially will we note his brain reactions if he has anyg the brain will be removed pa'rt by part while he is still living. Following his death, we will dissect him completely. A comprehensive re- port will be written and published in our anthropological journal. CTIII' 'wise ones le11111',' the 1111111 is led a'w11y,' the baboons scatter.l MRS. BABOON: l don't care whether he is intelligent or not. I think he is very good-looking. MISS BABOONA: What is your taste? Wliat can be good-looking in a faceless head like that? lsr BABOON: What a filthy animal! 2ND BABOON: Imagine having to go through life with a face and form like that! Let us thank the lVIaker that He has made us Baboons and not beasts! That He has seen fit, in His goodness, to make the Baboons the highest form of development, the topmost rung of the animal scale! And that He has made inferior animals, such as that creature, subservient to our enlightened will. KNISH : LEADER! 111111 fwc l111111f1'1'1l 111111 one 'Ii-. t gf lll 5 ! !'! rl!! lil: R tl' A 4 li' H, ill! H! li, i 1,4 Fil l tl' i i if! ll 4,1 fi!! tw! ia ali! H, lf! M l ! l li i -KI! fl ll in! lil .-X l! ,xx K' P Y, . miie? vi , fs. .w h U 'JNL-' - 1 !iLlCHUN!AN!'1 F! 19221 L.l.E.H.1! lfiiiii 1i H at fi? P'-1

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N--U V' . '.,,,g, r' W . ,f ..E,- ,jg rf 71': 'r'T-' 7' '- 'wi- gs.-Q, Q1 ,, ' emi-.-.Q-.'Hf-.. :am.?g:::zi13:zfm-e:m::::::m3:':e:.g:'rQ 's'r'. l...e.-n,s4.e.maa..'ifr:..i:':..as-,d - - ,, Y Ihr Gale nf the Burma. Some people think flmf bones are dry B111 ll1ey'll Avmzu zlijfferent when they die. ,Aff TOP poking us, cried the seventh and eighth ribs to the distal phalanx of the index finger. lt does seem as if we bones can't rest in peace at all. Femur, the biggest bone of them all, awoke with a start. XVhat's up, he asked Apeevishly, craning his neck to gaze severely at the rattling 'L I bones, ' Xou ribs should be accustomed to being poked by now. All the authors do it. Besides, you'li get enough poking and to spare when those new fresh- men come in. 'l hey won't handle you with kid gloves, rest assured. UNO need to tell us that, grunted Fibula. lt was only two years ago that a piece of clay clogged up my nutrient canal and l was nearly asphyxiated before it fell out. That's nothing, growled Talus, Five years ago one of those blamed freshmen threw me down and nearly broke my neck. Come, come, chimed in Radius. They are not such a bad lot at heart. They're only ignorant. Last year one of them took me home, and gave me a good clean- ing. He also introduced me to the family, one of whom exclaimed, 'Ain't nature grand? I' suggest that we select a committee to remonstrate with them. I-lo, those things come as easy as H to you, don't they ? cried Femur, The trouble with you, Radius, is that you're always running around in circles-never stop to think at all. How are we going to talk to them? Those marrowless freshmen don't even understand our language. They can't tell a tubercle from a tuberosity on a bet. As Femur's lips moved with aspera-ty, he sniffed the air. Suddenly a look of con- sternation spread over his face. Nlaybe it was the weather which informed him or maybe it was tuition. Wlio knows? At any rate, realization came to him that the vacation of the old bones was over. He knew that the grind was upon them once more, not to be averted, inevitable. Sadly shaking his head from before backwards, he drew himself up to his whole length and addressed the bones. ulldy friendsf, he began, we long bones are at our extremities. At this point Humerus burst into a loud guffaw, but was promptly silenced by Tibia, who was supporting liemur. Thereupon Humerus subsided and became sulci. Oblivious to the interruption Femur proceeded. Let us not obfuscate the issue. The barbaric horde is 'upon us. Soon all manner of indignities will be practised on us. Let us count our number so that afterwards we shall know our losses. l'll begin with the small bones first. VVe often lose them. Let the phalanges step forth as they did in old llflacedoniaf' he snapped. One by one each phalanx stepped forward, then deployed in battle formation. At length the whole fifty-six were arranged in order, led by Pollux and Castor. Femur's Cyclopian eye CO. T. Fovea Capitisj twinkled as he saw that none were missing. Then Let the lVIEf2lt2.1'SZllS, Metaca1'pals, Tarsals, and Carpals, range themselves behind the phalangesf' he cried. The myrmidons obeyed, and advancing, took their designated position with a most warlike air. But one place was empty. Where is Calcaneus ? asked Femur in concern. Page Iwo 1l1I71l1lI'l'If and Ilirrr' i l. in l. .i lfzi ir: V V' 111. iii i i v.. l.. i. .A i ii-' il? .ij iful, - 'M Q. li' y i. 1 51 3 .. ,V ii? QQ ll I Hz 1' H I5 1. li .ff ii 'Q ii, ,. fl mi if Q Vi la f it . 'Lai li' lla fa ffl ily r l-1 Qi l. Y i gi i 1 VII,-I '. 7 , Ally, 'ff w f fha' . ri- ffffif :g'ga'j'flL:'Q1: 'l 'rr ir may lf , .f..-l i 4 I 1 U ' fail