London South Collegiate Institute - Oracle Yearbook (London, Ontario Canada)

 - Class of 1931

Page 8 of 132

 

London South Collegiate Institute - Oracle Yearbook (London, Ontario Canada) online collection, 1931 Edition, Page 8 of 132
Page 8 of 132



London South Collegiate Institute - Oracle Yearbook (London, Ontario Canada) online collection, 1931 Edition, Page 7
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London South Collegiate Institute - Oracle Yearbook (London, Ontario Canada) online collection, 1931 Edition, Page 9
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Page 8 text:

LQS. c. 1. ORACLE MR. ARMSTRONG: Scientists have just discovered something 500 times as sweet as sugar. C. SADLER: They have! Why l've known her for 10 years. Pk Dk ik There was a young lady from Ride, Of eating green apples she died. Within the .lamented They quickly fermented, And made cider inside 'er inside. wk Pk SIC A Scotchman had an automobile. What worried the highlander more than anything else was the amount of gasoline his automobile used. One day he went to his little garage in the back yard, took the cap off the gas tank of his car and squinted inside -but it was too dark. He couldn't see a thing. Now the Scotchman was very anxious to know how much gaso- line he had so he lighted a match to have a little look. Accidentally the match dropped into the tank. ' Well, wouldn't that twist yer whisk- ers! hooted the Scotchman in dismay, as he peered after the lighted match. She's empty again. ,gl qfglgxl 4 Two Londoners, travelling to the north of Scotland, were discoursing on the scenery. Isn't this entrancing? said one. It's superb, agreed the other. Ye're both wrang, said the old Scot in the corner, it's Killecrankief' 99 MAN UPSTAIRS: You are knocking at the wrong door. A INDIGNANT CALLER! Nonshensh, you're shleeping in the wrong housh! Pk Pk wk VISITOR! Have you ever been up the Nile? GORD. HOTHAN: I have that, sir. What a view there was from the sum- mit. P14 FIC if BILL: Did you read about the man who swallowed his teaspoon? JIM! No, what happened to him. BILL: He can't stir. if Ik Ulf LADY Qdriving into gasoline station in a Bantam Austinj: Will you please give me one pint of gasoline, one cup of water and two thimblesfull of oil? OPERATOR Cat stationj : Would you like me to whistle in your tires? 'x ' fr' xl Z Mi-ag ff ia as - -A., ....-4 W 'T H- fy Ei Eff 5 'ff' fi Q31 -.6 Granny Cto little boy playingl: Go and get my handkerchief dearie, please, it's upstairs. Little Boy: I'll go if you really want me to, granny, but I don't mindif you sniff.

Page 7 text:

98 L. S. C. I. ORACLE James' reading lesson was about ships. He came to a word he could not pro4 nounce. Barque, prompted the teacher crossly. Bow-wow! said James obediently. fff . 2 go., 03, U6 eeiw lKi lil Q Jog dudvff L15flV1'l.oOKbYS'0P er O G3 'I -I dvbqf-gag hxsexv oPF1o sf' I I 1 0 in 6 o.-- J lv GIYV'l1 foak Lweffq ,Y rg, Q ' N 1 x1ul'f,f, -gpf1..,. , A J f Q Q 'Z vw-me his cm, In--.vl :ical ,gi . A625 ' Lff 1.77 CQ! Y Yam Y .v 'ZLL Al ' yl- ku, hvvdel Lulu ,lbw 1 f' P 1 r.. i-5 J DAB You have three pairs of glasses, professor? Yes, I use one to read with, one to the third to' find see at distance, and the other two. - 914 Pk all ERNIE GROH: Why don't ladies give after dinner speeches? FRED HAYsoM: They can't wait that long. Ik Pk Sf JEAN HUTCI-11NsoN: I didn't sleep well last night. I had an awful tooth- ache. I VIVIAN WILKES: Oh! You should try repeating to yourself fifty times- 'Get behind me pain ! JEAN H.: Not much! Do you think I want lumbago? wk Dk :lf SALESLADY: Now here's a lovely sentiment-'Merry Christmas to the only girl I ever loved'. FRED HAYSOM: That's fine, I'll take five or six of those. ' DEPRESSION -,,,,,. Ev K3'1J- I-4-513. help a. Poor aero bail' JEANE WATT: This vanishing cream is a fake. DRUGGIST: Why? JEANE: I've used it on my feet every night and they are just the same as they were. Pk H4 :lf JIM MCHALE: I passed your .car last night and it sounded as though it had a miss in it. BEV. SMITH: Could you hear her squawk too? ak ak Pls MR. IRELAND: Tom, what's a bliz- zard? TOM BALLANTYNE: The insides of a buzzardf' . ' , J i H' -- P' j ' I I pg ,-fill' na DEAREST JANE: I could swim the mighty ocean for one glance from your dear eyes. I could walk through a wall of flames for a touch of your sweet hands. I could leap the widest- stream for a word from your lovely lips. As always, AL. P.S. I'll be over Friday night if it doesn't rain. wk 'Pk ik MR. JENNINGS: Who is the world's smartest man? ' HAROLD KESTER: Edison. He in- vented the phonograph and the radio so people would stay up all night and burn his electric light bulbsf'



Page 9 text:

100 This Auto Be Good The congestion between periods in the halls of the edifice commonly called the L.S.C.I. has been a perplexing problem to the principal and a few-a very few-students of the aforesaid institution. Mr. Graham, after con- sidering the problem, was struck by a bolt from the blue, a sudden thought Cs-sh no! no- nothing seriousl. He immediately called in a committee of staff and students to delve further into the feasibility of his plan. The committee found the plan prac- tical and this is it: Each student will be provided with a DeLuxe, sports model, Baby Austin roadster, selective trans- mission, free running, super-heterodyne -or what have you! How's that? Oh yes, I auto tell you that the con- veners of the committee are Mrs. Carr- Harris and Bus Wideman, who expect to get the plan in operation by April 1, 1932. Now to go into details. The lower sections of the present lockers will be used as garages, so in this respect there is no extra expense. Arriving in the morning., you go to your-locker, put in your cap and get out your car and books. Now keep to the right and spiral down stairs. Steady now! There's Orian and Verna chatting at the bottom. Whoopee! they just cleared the tracks in time. Bumping down into the auditorium we see that the chairs have all been re- moved and we line up in rows as be- fore. There is the last bell, the last car bumps over the steps and all eyes front. In come the sedate staff in cars like our own with the addition of sirens. We are now spared the tre- mendous physical exertion of standing and when any announcement is made we need not waste our energy by clapping our hands but merely lean our elbows on the horns. Now the auditorium is cleared in a very few seconds and we roar up the stairs to our classrooms. Another startling discovery greets us here-the desks have all been removed. So we merely turn down the windshield and use it for adesk top. Later on in the period our attention is drawn by the sounding of a siren to the fac-t that a lesson is being taught in the room-somebody up near the front I.. S. C. I. ORACLE I think-yes-so it is. The phone rings- Yes, yes, he is. All right, then Baldwin, you're wanted in the office. Now Donald turns on a red light on the bow of his boat which gives him the right of way to the office. But Oh! the drawback! He arrives there so quickly that he can't think whether he was sick in bed or had to go to the dentist's yesterday after- noon. Classes are changed very quickly now, but for those who always must get a drink at the far end of the hall there is a new gag: Please, sir, I ran out of gas. ' Concerning the expenses-to the individual student there is none. The financial backing has been arranged by the sale of desks and seats and by subscriptions from big-hearted members of the staff. Come on now, Let's give them a nice hand-honk! honk! sez you! V There goes that fire-bell again- somebody on the third floor this time maybe. Honk! Honk! All lights red! -C. SADLER, V A. Mg - , X.. 1 K , Z, I if Aqigm I F.. eiisa ml? if i 1. at yidilfld! nu Just my! Ugll c Fall-w Two. naw l1e'lI run fnfo Heir-I ,boi A Song Letter - You're driving me crazy with Three little words but I love you, and When it's Springtime in the Rockies, I'm yours, for I miss a little miss who misses me. There ought to be a moonlight saving time, then you could give me Something to remember you by, beneath Carolina Moon, where We would make a peach of a pair. -ELLA WRIGHT.

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