Liverpool High School - Hiawathan Yearbook (Liverpool, NY)

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The Old Jokes are The Henry Wiegand-Where I spent my vacation, the thermometer dropped to zero. Dick Witherall-That's nothing. Henry-What's nothing? Dick-Why, zero. Roy Peebles-Don't you think my mustache is becoming? Laurel Manwarren-It may be coming, but it hasn't arrived yet. Miss Heid fat prize speaking contest in East Syracusej-Marshall, get rid of your gum! Marshall Robinson-Where'll I put it? Marjorie Glahn-Put it on the judge's seat. Marshall-Oh, I can't do that, 'cause then he'd be stuck on East Syracuse. Carol Erlenback-Will the board please meet with me after the meeting. Carol Cat the close of the meetingj-Well, I see you're all here, but I just meant the Juniors. Unobserving Freshman-Well, you said you wanted to see the bored. so here I am! Best Jokes - co'nt'd All men are born equalg it's what they are equal to later that counts. We see in the reviews an account of a new Russian novel, Scratches by Ivan Awfulitch. Underscore the Correct Answers: 1. What is the best way to keep a skunk from smelling? Ccut oFf his nose, give him a bath, run the other way.j 2. What is a Senior? CA menace, a former big shot, an example for the Juniors.j 3. What is Latin? Ca headache, a language of pigs, an everlasting subjectj 4. What is golf? Ca reducing process, a swing-at and miss game, an uplift of the land.J 5. What is Meyer's Lane? Ca ping-pong gallery, a bicycle track, just a lanej Trips Through HERE being some seventy-two juniors, all not having the same classes, your corres- pondent will have to pick out one typical junior as he wends his way through a typical school day. First of all, we'll have to name the day. If we take Monday, it wouldn't be a typical day, for most of the scholars are recovering from the week-end and are, consequently, not quite awake. Of course, there are some exceptions to this rule, and that works both ways. For instance, there are some that are chipper as can be upon blue Monday. They bound in and out of classes with bright and cheerful remarks, which form a de- cided contrast to the rest of the despondent students. Then there are those who really can't seem to drag themselves about. They succeed for a while, then usually take a trip to dreamland, preferably in study hall. Then there is Tuesday. The students are not quite reconciled to the fact that they do have to go to school five days out of the seven. However, things are getting more cheerful. By Wednesday, they are thinking that after all life, as a whole, isn't so bad. They've been in The Classes school all of two days, and they have only two more to go, all of which leaves them in a normal state of mind. By Thursday and Friday, they are so good- natured that it would be abnormal, so we'll have to take Wednesday as th: typical day. About five minutes before nine, the pupils begin to straggle into the home-room. About nine o'clock, Miss Stone begins a series of pleas, all of which run along the same line- Quiet, Please. Also about this time, Dorothy Crowell runs into the room with the familar slip of blue papers-a pass telling Miss Stone that she is really here, but has gone to the library to be the more or less indispensible helper to Virginia Barker, that cheerful little person who makes the library ring with-well-girlish laughter. At about two minutes after nine, Chester Oeinck, who has been engaged in a terrific inner struggle as to whether he should come at all, gets to school, and eventually, to the home-room. The bell rings and the school-day begins. Those that stay in 309 for the French class are likely to witness the following scene:

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Are They Peace Time Ambitious? - cont'd When we study the causes and the effect of war in such a light, we begin to see just what the term international anarchy really includes. Through discussion we discover how the muni- tions manufacturers have done anything but wait for trouble to begin, but instead have stirred it up. When we see all this, it should give us a glimpse of where some of our future work should lie. We heartily agree with joseph Lash, leader of the American Student Council, who said, 'fThe highest service to one's country today is to prevent it from going to war. , .l.l-- The Qld Jokes are The Best Jokes Mrs. Wright-Come now, a rich beefy tone. Boys' Chorus-Mm-moo-moo. Betty Pease-I have no confidence in men. Marg Wackerle-Why not? Betty-Every time I go out with another boy I see my steady with another girl. jimmy Gillette-We've walked for an hour and haven't been asked to ride. Mary Betty Irving-Well, I rode for two hours last night and wasn't asked to walk. Safety Note-When out driving, be sure there is no loose nut at the wheel. Marian Fingland-You know that public drinking fountain in the park? You know what I got from it? Fern Orman-Trench mouth? Marian-No, water. Fred Randall--And while you were kissing your sweetie good-night, did it ever dawn on you- Keith Attle-No, I never stayed that late. Professor Reed-A fool can ask more questions than a wise man can answer. Butch Parsons-That's why we all flunked. Helen Heid-Why do gentlemen prefer blondes ? Virginia Keller-I think the fact that blondes know what gentlemen prefer has a lot to do with lt. Billy Donaldson-What it takes to win women I've got. jimmy Gillette-Then lend me two bits. Johnnie Gehm-Cwatching a Swiss yodelerj Gee, that Listerine gets all over the world, doesn't it? A novelist claims that the best cure for hyster- ics is a kiss. They say Butch and Art are now working on the problem of how to give a girl hysterics. Billy Graves-I passed your house yesterday. Marjorie Glahn-Thanks awfully. Ola Kentner and june Houck, passing the cemetery: Ola-I'll never be buried in that ground as long as I live. One of the Liverpool boys-I don't see how you can afford to take so many girls to expensive restaurants. The other one-That's easy. I always ask each girl just before we go in if she hasn't been putting on weight. A bright boy-How much do you charge for funeral notices? Newspaper Clerk-Thirty cents an inch. Boy-My goodness, that's robbery. My bro- ther was six feet tall! Sign seen in Heid's Restaurant recently If you can't chew our steaks, please don't bend them. The next person might have better teeth. After making a prohibition speech in which he said that all liquor should be dumped into the river, the speaker said, Now in conclusion, the quartet will render, 'Shall We Gather At the River?' High school is just like a washing machine. You get out of it just what you put in, but you'd never recognize it. Why does a fellow feel so sick when he goes into the operating room? Solution: Because he sees so many white caps.

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Trips Through The Classes - confd Miss Stone is writing at the black-board. Mar- jorie Glahn whispers to Virginia Keller. Miss Stone Cturning aroundj-Elsie! Elsie Kipp fquite astonishedj-But what did I do? Miss Stone-Never mind, we haven't time to go into that now. Miss Stone returns to her work. Virginia Keller whispers to Marjorie Glahn. Miss Stone Cturning aroundj-Elsie! Elsie Cstill astonishedj-Butn Miss Stone-Never mind, we haven't time to go into that now. Oh well, cheer up Elsie. Now to go on in our tour. Ah, a history class. What fun! Mrs. Webb-We will now take up the Current Events Paper. All students obediently pick up the paper. Mrs. Webb--Oh no, I mean that mentally we will take it up. All students resignedly put their papers away. Mrs. Webb-James Duerr, the first question in the miscellaneous group, What Shakespear- ean tragedy is being made into a movie. P James Duerr-Julio and Romiet. Mrs. Webb-You're sure you don't mean U Romeo and Juliet? james fdoubtfullyj-Well, maybe. Extremely loud guffaws. And so it goes. It is now time for all the little juniors to assem- ble in Miss Frank's room for their English lesson. Miss Frank-I want it understood before class starts that there is to be no unnecessary noise. The students digest this prize bit of humor, and proceed to take up the conversation where it had left off before the interruption. Having said their say, they begin to think about the next topic of conversation. Miss Frank Cr-udely interrupting their train of thoughtj-Well, I'm glad that you've decided to give me a chance to talk. just how many of you have your lesson done? The facial expressions of the Juniors run the gamut of emotions-great surprise, lesser sur- prise, slightly worried, very worried, and last, fewest, but not least, absolute peace. Robert Parsons, always quickest to regain the art of conversation. turns to Marjorie Glahn. Robert-Well, Glahn, have you got it done? Marjorie placidly ignores him. Miss Frank-Well, Robert, have you got it done? Robert Ctriumphantly J-Yes! Henry Meloling-Ha! He fooled you. Miss Frank-Well, let me put it another way. How many have not got their lessons done? One by one hands reluctantly raise. Miss Frank-Hand your papers in. All of those who haven't got a paperwill be marked F. Groans. Miss Frank-Silence! The last bell rings just then, interrupting this friendly little conversation. Of course, this is only a brief resume of the classes, and doesn't include all of them. It also leaves out the study halls, which usually run about the same anyway, and also the noon hour, which is relatively unimportant. As the bell rings, the students wearily file back into the home room. Miss Stone-Quiet Please. The following will report to 207 9 Chester Oeinck, and Lena DeNeve. Ah! The end of a perfect day. - BLUE MONDAY Things are scattered here and there, Coats and dresses are on the chairsg My English is lost, my pencil, too And Oh! Where is my other shoe? Mother is calling, the bell struck past eight, My lessons aren't learned, I'm going to be lateg Off I go to school on a run Wishing that Monday had never come. -JANE W. BREWSTER ALMA MATER On the shores of Onondaga Stands our dear old Liverpool Loyal to our Alma Mater Always is our rule. Pledging our hearts to orange and blue This, our worthy school. Firmly we shall stand together For our Liverpool. MARGARET WACKERLE