Lincoln High School - Lincolnian Yearbook (Kansas City, MO)

Page 28 text:

26 THE LINCOLNIAN Mr. A. J. was asked what a river was. He answered, put- ting ' all of the vim, vigor and vitality in his voice, so as to hold the attention of his fellow students : “A river (a-hem) is a body of water floating upon the land.” The Senior cooking class made some punch one day and sent Prof. C. a glass. C. W. — “Mr. C., I think those girls are stingy.” Prof. C. — “Why, I don’t think so.” C. W. — “Why, they didn’t give us any punch.” Prof. C. — “It will take a barrel to fill you boys up.” . C. W. — “Why, Profressor, how do you figure that out?” Prof. C. — “P.ecause you boys are so spongy.” In the Psychology class an experiment was being per- formed which required the use of glass with which to keep the person from seeing. The experiment went along nicely until a girl was used in its, and then Prof. G. asked a boy to tie the glasses over her eyes, because he being afraid of rats thought it best to stay away from the trap, because some young mice might bite him.

Page 27 text:

THE LINCOLNIAN 26 LINCOLNIAN HUMOR Miss W. P., of our Senior class, asked : “Are the cartoons all gone?’’ (meaning croutons). ‘ It seems an established fact that Miss H. W. always se- lects the first topic in chemistry and we (the Seniors) take it for granted that she just wishes to introduce, the day’s lesson (nit). In the laboratory the different alkalies were being passed around to the members of the class. Miss W. P., wishing to take a second look at the alkali, said : “Professor, please pass the gymnasium” (meaning gypsum). Miss H. M. (after being informed that a test was to be given in chemistry on the following day) asked : “Prof. C., what is the test going to be on?” Prof C. — “On paper.” One day the Senior class of the Sumner High School was visiting our class and we were reporting on the works of Spen- cer. Miss Jones asked R. S. to name some of his most impor- tant works. He rose immediately and said: “Spencer’s Fairy Tales” (meaning “Faerie Oueene”). The other school didn’t laugh much ;no, not very. Ha ! ha ! ha ! Miss Tones called on C. W. and asked if Shakespeare h ? any children and if so to name them. He answered: “Ye sum, he had two and their names are Romeo and Juliet. (From this answer we inferred that he had had some romance in his short life.) Miss S. (the English teacher) asked her pupils to bring in some compositions to be read in class. All of the scholars had finished theirs but W. T. (Junior). He read his composition, and it was as follows : “Cows is cows, cows is a beautiful an- imal, cows give milk, but as for me, give me libertv or give me death.” Miss R. H. (who is a member of the Astronomy class) was asked what a comet was. Miss R. IT. had been watching the appearance and disappearance of Halley’s comet and there- fore she replied : “A comet is a moving body.” Prof. C. — “You are a moving body, are you a comet?” (A murmur was all that was heard.)

Page 29 text:

1 you’ll get credit for all extra work.”