Lincoln High School - Lincolnian Yearbook (Kansas City, MO)

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THE LINCOLNIAN 31 Professor — Good. Miss Blanton, give the functions of each. Miss Blanton — The cerebrum is the seat of higher psychical action, cerebel- lum balances in walking, and the me- dulla oblongata is the center of reflex actions. Professor — Very good. By what is the brain divided? Miss Roberts — By glands known as fissures. Professor — Yes. The brain was spoken of by some psychologists as be- ing a wonderful piece of mechanism, be- ing divided by glands into divisions and each performing its own mrncular func- tion. Stimuli of one class are conveyed to its own particular division for execu- tion. (Miss Starks interrupts by raising hand.) Miss Starks — Well, professor, sup- pose the brain was not divided. What would be the result? Professor — Well, the result would be this : All stimuli would be possibly con- eyed to the same portion of the brain. And none of them would receive the right execution, or the person would be deemed insane. Miss Williams (following with a question) — Well, professor, suppose one portion of the brain be removed, then what ? Professor — Then a certain class of stimuli would receive no execution, and would also be partly insane. Barker (interrupts) — Well, profes- sor — Professor (interrupts) — Sit down, please. I can’t listen to any more ques- tions. I believe this is a made-up job to keep me talking. We’ll proceed. Name and explain the fissures, Samson Samson — Well, you see, professor, there were two fishers in ancient Greece and one day — Professor (interrupts) — Sit down. You don’t know this. Samson — Yes, I do, professor. Let me — Professor — Will you sit down, please. Samson — But I wish to explain, pro- fessor. Professor — Take your books and leave the room. (Turns to Bryant.) Answer that, please. Bryant (stammering) — W-w-well, yu-yu-you see, Pro-Pro-Professor, these le-le-leaders, you know, ar-ar-are ca-ca- called g-g-glands or fi-fi-fissures, an-an- and they run a-a-across this w-w-way (crossing the head with his finger), an- an-and a-cr-cr-cross this way. Professor (interrupting) — That will do. Sit down. Starks, give me an ex- ample of reflex action? Starks — You know, Professor, when a fellow sits down on a pin and uncon- sciously get-up what he does is reflex ac- tion. Professor — Sit down. I don’t want any more such examples as that in here. One of your god friends has been sent from the room for such work, ancLthe way is not blockaded yet. And a hint to the wise is sufficient. (After a pause he continues.) It is evident that all brains are alike and act in a like man- ner. Starks (interrupts) — Professor, if all brains are alike, then a man’s brain is like a monkey’s, and if a man’s brain is li ke a monkey’s brain, why is not a man a monkey? (All laugh.) Professor (after laugh is over) — Some men are monkeys. (All laugh.) Professor — Now, I would like to say a word at this point. This is not the place for us to be smart and cute, nor to make ourselves conspicious. Enter Manda (all laugh) — Good mornin’. Professor — Good morning, miss. Manda — You’se de ’fessor of dis col- lege, I ’spose?” Professor — I am one of them, miss. And with what satisfactory information may I supply you? Manda — You means, what do I want? Professor — Certainly. Manda (sets her bundle down) — Well, you see I been goin’ ter school down here in de country wha I came from Miss Meade (interrupting — Leave that part out. Manda (rolls her eyes at Miss Meade and proceeds — And dey don’t teach noth- ing but readin’, writin’ and ’rithmetic, and I made up my mind I wanted to go to college where I could learn some

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80 THE LINCOLNIAN Winifred — Likes her, well I should say. Did you see the emerald ring he gave her? Edmonia — I wonder where lie got it. Madge — I bet he rented it. Grace — Perhaps he found it. Marie and Dorothy — I saw the ring, but had no idea George gave it to her. Olivia — Well, how do you know he gave it to her? Winifred — Lie did! She told me so. (Blanche enters.) Thelma and a Few Girls — Hello, B’anche. Blanche — Good morning, girls. Thelma — What a pretty ring. When did you get it. Blanche — Oh ! I have had it about a month now. Thelma — Guilty creature ! Blanche — Guilty I remain. Amy — How I do hate psychology. All— Me, too. Grace — I, too. Doll-Girls, I tell you what let’s do! Chorus — Tell us something. Doll — Let’s study ! Madge — Oh! Ding dong bells, it don’t worry me. Mildred — Oh ! you don’t have to study because you are the professor’s daugh- ter, nor you, Winnie — Grace — Because professor likes you. Clara — Say. girls, did you hear pro- fessor say Winnie was fair? All — Fair! Fair! Clara — Yes ; I don’t think it’s right for a professor to say one pupil is fair. Winifred — Oh! he didn ' t mean fan- in complexion. I asked him how I stood and he said, “Fair.” Grace — Fair with him, perhaps. All — We understand. Amy — Say, girls, I tell you what let’s do. Grace — Spit it out. All — Tell us something. Amy — Let’s make up some questions to ask old professor to consume time. All — Good, sure, all right. Grace — Bully idea. Clare — You shouldn’t say that. Pro- fessor told us not to use the word bullv. Grace — What professor says doesn’t worry me. Edmonia — Why don’t you have your lessons like me? All — Miss Studious ! (In come boys.) — Hello, girls; good morning. Mildred — Say, boys, we don’t know our lessons and guess you all don ' t know yours, so we are going to ask old pro- fessor some questions to consume time. Boys — God! Bully idea! Sure! All right ! Mildred — What shall they be? Boys — Any old thing. A Few — Wonder where Jack is? I guess he is washing dishes. Olivia — I can’t see how Jack knows his lessons when he has to work for his board. George — Here comes old Jack. Did you break any dishes, old boy? Fred — You see, he is a professional dishwasher. How could he break any dishes ? A Few — Here comes old professor now-. (Students are assembled. Enter pro- fessor.) Professor — Surely this can’t be the senior class. What has come over you ? Youlre acting like a body of students this morning. And I’m proud of it, Well, we ' ll review today. From the first to fifth chapter we have learned that psychology is concerned solely with what is deemed the most important or- gan of the human system And we ' ll be- gin our recitation with its definition. De- fine the brain, Miss Meade? Miss Meade (not knowing) — Well, professor, I had such a severe headache last night and could not study at all. Professor — Yes; sit down. Psychol- ogy gives you those complains. Miss Cardner, answer that, please. Miss Gardner — The brain is a con- glomeration of nerve cells and fibers. Professor — Good. Name the divisions, Miss Porter. Miss Porter — The brain is divided into seven divisions (thinking), and — Professor (interrupting) — Sit down. You don’t know anything about this. I guess you had the headache, too. Miss Lawrence, answer that, please. Miss Lawrence — The brain is divided into three divisions — cerebrum, cerebel- lum and medula oblongata.

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32 THE LINCOLNIAN neuralgy and pschumeralogy, etc. So dat’s my business here. Professor — Very well, miss. I’ll di- rect you to the president’s office. Manda — You mean you’se goin’ with me ? Professor — No. Manda — Well, I never find it if you don ' t, ' cause I’se been two hours and a haf tryin’ to find dis place, and I don’t propose to chase up and down dese halls any longer, so I make myse’f at home til you makes up your mind to go wid me. (Sits down.) Professor (turns to class) — Well, pro- ceed. George, give me the relation of age to the brain ? George — Well, Professor, I can’t give you that exactly, but I think Professor (interrupts) — I don’t want what you think. I’m trying to see what you know. George — Well, you see, Professor Professor — Yes, I see you don’t know. Sit down. It is the same old story in the same old way : “You see, Professor.” How did you get into this college, any- way? Ah! I see. You’re on that foot- ball team for today. I want to say a word to all of you. I’m going to have a respectable pschology recitation, or there ' ll be no football or any other ath- letics for any of you. Bear that in mind, piease. Jack, answer that? Jack — The brain reaches its maximum weight about the 15th year, but con- tinues to gain until about the 30th year. And finally reaches a point where it be- gins to decline. Hence we get the the- ory of superiority of youthful brain over the aged. Professor — Good ; the best recitation I’ve had today. You must not be on that football team for today. What is the capacity for receiving atmospheric vibrations, Stevenson ? Stevenson — Let me see, Professor. I think about 15 to 9,000 is the limit Professor (interrupting) — Sit down. You don’t know this. Blanche, answer that, please? Blanche — The rate of receiving atmos- pheric vibrations is from 16 to 30,000 per second, and above 36,000 a sound is heard. Professor — Good. Manda (interrupting — Say, Mister ’Lessor, what is dis and whar am I at, anyway ? Professor — This is the senior class in pschology, miss. Manda — Um-hum. Well, I believe I’ll take pschumnolog. Professor — Sorry, miss, but you will not be ready for this study until 1913, when you shall be a sen ior. Manda — Oh, yes, thank you. Professor (to class) — Well, leave the brain and pass to perception. What aie dreams, Madge ? Madge — Dreams are associated ideas. Manda (interrupting) — Say, Mister ’Fesor, is dreams pschumnology ? Professor — Psychology is concerned w’th dreams, miss. Manda — Lawdy, me, I’se been havin’ pschumnology all my life and didn’t know what it was. I had some pschum- nology last night. Pa’s old red cow got after me and Professor (interrupts) — Pardon me, miss, but will you please not interrupt us just now. Save your experiences un- til another date. Manda — ’Scuse me. Professor — What are halfficinations ’ Manda (interrupting — ’Sense me, Mister ' Fessor, but is hallucinations any kin to Carrie Nation? I know her. Professor — Miss — er — what is your name ? Manda — My name is Manda Harris Martha Washington Beecher Stowe Johnson. Professor — Well, Miss Johnson, will you please be seated and not rise any more until you’re called on ? Manda — To be co’se. Professor (to class) — Our recitation has been greatly interrupted this morn- ing and we’ll continue our review for tomorrow. Our time is up. Class ex- cused. Exit class, all but George, Jack and Blanche. Professor (to Manda) — I ' ll show you to the office, miss. Manda — Yes, sir. Exit Manda and professor. Blanche — Oh, Mr. Willis, I learn that you have made the ’varsity. Allow me to congratulate you.