Leeds High School - Leeder Yearbook (Leeds, AL)

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THE LEEDER During our stay at L. II. S. we have spent 66,242 hours in class. This does not include the time that Nelle Carreker and Frank Cooke have spent in riding the train. We should have spent 42.129 hours in preparation for the classes but the unusual brilliancy of Colinnc Mcl-aughlin and Curtis Littleton reduced that number to 194.248.5 hours. There seems to Ik- quite a diversity of opinion as to which member of the family uses the most shoe polish. Two are presenting their claims to this honor. The slight majority seems to favor A. J. Abercrombie, but the close friends of Overton Xickcrson claim a victory for him. It has been rumored that if the high title of Mathematics Shark fails to fall upon J. I). Scott it will unquestionably descend upon Maggie Stone. I am loath to close these statistics without mentioning the greatest problem ever undertaken by any member of our class, that of Loia Hoover and Anna Lou George in an elTort to find out the economical spirit of our class. You mav obtain the formula from said party. As we part with the old L. 11. S. we shed 5% gallons and 2 tears over, which shows that we love her as much as we do B. A. Higgins hot dog stand and the creek combined. When we leave there will Ik two Juniors and four teachers sorry, leaving the remainder to be glad forever and ever. Ckcii. Grant ’24. Twenty-three

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THE LEEDER a wi Senior Class Statistics Fellow Students: To me has fallen the preponderous task of compiling the statistics of this enormous Leeds High School Senior Class of ’24. In trying to find out what a statistician should do 1 am indebted to some of the greatest men of the country, among whom are 32 lawyers. 12 newspaper editors. 21 mechanics. 35 policemen, and five members of this Senior class. 1 found the following definition available: Statistics are conglomerations, compilations of facts: true or untrue, fantastic or otherwise, deflexible or fixed according to the predicament of the students, their active or imaginary qualities, properties or resources. I cannot present every detailed statistic. Should I do that it would take 7 leap years. 13 kilowatt hours, and 52 seconds, exactly half our beloved bachelor. Smith McLaughlin’s age. In our large family there are 24 members. Of this number ten are human: the remainder are gentlemen. The bulk of this class is due largely to having Willie Tera Hartsfield and Ralph Powers among its members. In fact. 1 am sorry to begin with the heavy weights of this enormous class, but I find this the hulk of my task. 1 find the combined weight of the family to 44694.4 grams by Charles’law. By subtracting the weight of Dad” Bagby’s shoes and Smith McLaughlin’s spectacles we have only half of that sum. 1 find the correct height of our family to l c 3241.2 inches. There has never lveen a more beautiful hunch of animals driven together since the days of the Pilgrim Fathers. I find 88.4 per cent of them ready to serve as bathing models, 99.2 per cent as black face comedians, and 99.4 per cent have offers of positions as preachers, butlers, street car conductors, and various other positions of honor, all gained by their silly looks. By the theory of evolution you will observe that these Seniors have various wavs of obtaining and keeping their beauty, such as Aubrey Aders hair part. As a whole the bovs use only one gallon and four quarts of olive oil per dav. This costs 98 cents a gallon making a total of $4 334.29 per year which is enough to erect and support a male beauty parlor on each side of Courson’s barl ectie stand. 1 must be on my way as I have so many interesting things to relate about this class. My memory has collapsed with the thought of the next topic. O my. tlie home of grand opera jellies” and flappers. Could we invent a device to unravel the voices of Doris Elliott. Cecil Grant, and Xelda Roberts, we should have pitch high enough to reach the highest aeroplane pilot and lull him to sleep for a month. Twenty-two

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THE LEEDER Senior Class Prophecy It is inherent in the human heart to desire to look into the future. Today, fellow students, no doubt many of us are wondering what our future has in store for us. May we not lie guilty of building air castles, for some of us will be doomed to disappointment. One day last October, being tired of studying. I strolled down town to the notorious Higgins’ Mot Dog Stand.” There I ate weiners and hamburgers until I could hardly move. Very soon afterwards, feeling dull. lazy, and sleepy, I left the bunch of girls, went home and to my room. There I lay down upon my lied and was soon fast asleep. Suddenly I was aroused from my sleep by a soft, sweet, musical voice. I saw before me a lieautiful goddess draped in pure white. She informed me that I almost equalled Kip Van Winkle as a sleeper, for I had slept fifteen years. I was ashamed to appear to the beautiful creature, for I did not make a very attractive picture. She told me not to mind for she was accustomed to such sights in Leeds. In her snowy white hand she held a long scroll which proved to l e the record of the class of 1 24. Site very kindly consented to let me read it. as I was very eager to know what all my classmates had been doing since leaving school. I read it over and over with much enthusiasm until I knew it by heart. So today. 1 am able to present to you. fellow classmates, your future achievements. Ira DeShazo has become very important in the industrial world. He invented a machine for boring holes in dough nuts. After hearing Mr. Aders lecture so many times on Rural Economics, Hubert Bagbv decided he would accomplish for the animal industry what Burbank has for Horticulture. He began by experimenting on swine, and has succeeded in producing a breed which is almost entirely bam. Dewell Miller contemplated going to some well known college, but was caught stealing chickens and is now helping to reduce our heatless” days bv digging coal. A few years ago Raymond Hammett invented a fountain pen which would automatically write the answers to any possible examination question, l ie became rich selling them to Leeds High School students. Tubby” Powers has succeeded Dr. N. R. Baker as superintendent of education. Cotton” Littleton is traveling with a large pack on his back. He is determined to make a second Carnegie of himself. So far he has made slow progress disposing of his goods. I fe is still inclined to sleep in the day time. Overton Nickerson has accepted a call as pastor of the First Baptist Church of Birmingham and lias started to work in his new field. Twenty-four