Laurel High School - Laurels Yearbook (Laurel, MT)

Page 15 text:

The 1939 Laurels Class Will TO WHOM IT MAY CONCERN: Whereas, that body of intellects known as the Class of 1939 (also known to freshmen and other parasitical growths by names too revolting to mention). Having dominated Laurel High for four years, hereby files its intentions of graduating. Rumors to the effect that the faculty had contemplated dynamiting the school from under us are unfounded and should he ignored. WHEREAS: The aforementioned class, being of sound mind and body (mind b the rest of the faculty, hod by Bennett) hereby revoke all wills heretofore published by us and declare this to be our Last Will and 1 csta-ment. Article I We leave Mr. Graff and Mr. Bennett with their shoulders held a little squarer and smiling through their tears. To the Math department we leave A and B still out buying potaotes. To the Laurel Leaves we leave numerous vacancies in the various columns to be filled with the names of the more prominent Juniors. To the Alumni we leave an example of what they might have been had they tried a little harder. To the Faculty we leave the school devoid of athletes, actors, musicians, debaters, and all skilled labor in general. Article II To the future football team, aided by the Alumni, we leave that sacred trust, the goal posts. As the F. F. A. boys arc taking Alex Ro-bertus along, they haven't anything of note to leave. Bruce and Russell leave—arm in arm. Mary Zier and Marjorie Dix arc in deep thought of whether it is safe to leave their N. Y. A. boys to anyone else. Warren Slater and Ed Russell are wondering who will take their place in football next year; Mr. Bennett is wondering, too. M arie Dickson's great ability to raise cats has been showered upon Pat Judd—not that she gets lonesome. Frederick Logan Hilgert Jr. leaves 95% of the girls in a dazed dilemma somewhat resembling the condition inflicted by hot air. Margaret Frank leaves Mr. Graff frantically searching the ranks of the Junior girls for someone to take her place. Roscoc Branstetter’s ability to talk to himself is passed on to Jimmy Cusick. Helen Stouffer leaves her quiet reserved ways to Jean Bliss, hoping she will make better use of them this year. Freida Coulter wishes her little case of measles to anyone who will take them—she is through associating with such things. Arthur Barthoff wills his varied fantastic excuses to the person needing them most. Could it be Bill Gibson? Helen Leis wills her glasses to anyone who will wear them. Paul Mogan leaves with the same blank look he wore five years ago. Gertrude Gilles, Mr. Bennett's errand girl, leaves this school weary of body but not of mind. Mayfra Wold leaves David Kiedrowski to Cynthia Martini. Thirteen

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The 19.59 Laurels Class Prophecy Hash! Mr. Howard Pewitt, star fullback of Southern California, has just announced his acceptance of a Rhodes Scholarship to England. He is giving up athletics for more serious studies. Laurel! Miss Erma Shay has just announced the establishment of a turtle pond on her ranch near here. She intends to raise them. Hash! Lung Island. Miss Helen Stouffer, famous clothes designer, has just announced that for the fall fashions women will wear hats, shoes and dresses. Rosemary Spcckeen is coach of the Moss-main Mossers. They are going to play the Youngs Point Pointers Thursday nite. Flash! Park City. Miss Gertrude Gilles has just been elected superintendent of schools. She has been teaching around here for the past few years. Flash! Reed Point. Mr. and Mrs. Gene De Erance, she the former Miss Marjorie Smith, have gone on their second honey moon. Flash! Hollywood. Miss Jean Wilson stopped in Laurel for a few days to renew old acquaintances. She has been in California giving the latest of her fashion parades. Miss Wilson is a dress designer for a New York fashion firm. One of the most distinguished of Laurel’s sports alumni is Homer Wheeler, who is head coach at Yale for the coming year. M rs. Mayfra Wold Wright arrived in Laurel to visit with her parents. Mrs. Wright will be joined by her husband, Edward, in April and they will return to Panama Canal Zone where he is a government civil engineer. Miss Mary Zier has been appointed head of the nursing staff at the John Hopkins Hospital at Baltimore, Md. Hash! IFashington. Miss Margaret Frank has just been appointed Secretary to the President of the United States. She is the only person in the United States who can sign the President's name and not get sentenced to prison. The Bronx. N. Y. Miss Loretta Segler has just presented her husband with triplets. The oddity of this news item is that her husband is one of triplets. Miss Marjorie Dix has just been elected superintendent of schools at Billings. How we envy you. Flash! Harvard U. Bob Freund, football coach at Harvard, has just announced that his daughter. Pat, will play halfback at his next football game at Notre Dame. Flash! Livingston. 1 iss Marjorie Goldsmith, famous drummer of Laurel band, has announced her resignation from the band in order to be able to go to Livingston and drum for Miss Lorraine Allan. Flash ! Mr. Archie Durkec has just been made president of the famous “Scratch” club and has announced that the name will be changed to Itch.” Mr. Paul Mogan has just been made I . F. A. supervisor of Montana. Mr. Elroy McManus has just accepted a job as modeler in a New York men’s store. His attractive eves made him especially apt for modeling hats. T welve

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Thk 1939 Laurels Class Will Homer Wheeler wills a fight to anyone who tries to get Helen. Marjorie Smith leaves school with a dreamy look in her eyes—who could he be, Marjorie ? Leone Barker wills her library appeal to nobody—no one could get it if they tried. Art Albright and Glenn Roysdon really don't feel that there is anyone who can fill their places in the feminine hearts, but Delmer and Bernard are promises in that line. Geraldine Cook wills her steno pad to Virginia Freund with the hopes that Virginia makes better use of it than she did. Burdette Rash leaves his unique ability to sleep in class to Denny Goldsmith. Jean Wilson leaves the future hair styles to the keeping of some enterprising Junior with plenty of bobbie pins. Bob Freund leaves his beautiful appearance in a basketball suit to “Beans” Strending. Rosemary Speckeen leaves with tears in her eyes—oh, yeah ! Archie (Itchy) Derychere wills his “scratch” to Charles Brohaugh. Don’t scratch too hard, Chuck, you’ll wear it out. Marjorie Goldsmith leaves her air-mindedness to Lldora Dix, knowing she’ll make good use of it. Elroy McManus wills his gray hair to the teachers—they’ll have it in a few years anyway. Lorraine Allen leaves her hair to Lester Burke—don’t fret too much, Billy, it’s back in the family again. Erma Shay wills her turned-up nose to Billy Mote—it goes with her hair. Howard Pewitt, Sugarbeet for short, was so hashful we hunted for a week before we found what he wished to leave here—just Roberta Speare. Loretta Scgler wills her sneeze to Billec Rae—not meaning to interfere with Billee’s personal one. Elnora Stcnerson leaves her fearlessness of speaking her mind to the timid freshmen. Alex Gradwohl leaves his curly hair to Campbell Calvert hoping he will not need another permanent. Helene Roberts just laughed and laughed and laughed because she knew her laugh was the only thing worth while she had to leave. Esther Batt leaves her plumpness to Shirley Teeters, hoping it may add to her width if not her height. Billy Bray leaves Earl Herriott to plaj school-bus driver. Esther Lais hopes someone will be able to take her place in steno so Mr. Fellows won’t get gray hair before his time. Dolly Nelson, last but not least, leaves her position as president of Senior Class to anyone lucky enough to get it. We, the Class of ’39, make this our last Will and Testament. We will not accept the responsibility of any celebrity whose name is left out of this masterpiece. Signed and Sealed. CLASS OF ’39. Fourteen