Lancaster High School - Mirage Yearbook (Lancaster, OH)

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MIRAGE 31 quarters in New York City. Eloise Tidd will ably assist Harold as Society Editor. And again the haze of indistinctness ap- pears. The future is so clouded that I fear the globe is being taxed to its utmost capac- ity. In the year 1936—Now I have it, in the year 1936 Mildred Hamilton and Rob- ert M. Giesy will enter the race for Gover- nor of Ohio. “Dick” will win out and af- ter his defeat Robert will accept the Presi- dency of a large Women's College in the East. Leland McCleery and his wife Ethel Tracy McCleery will certainly lead a ro- mantic life as farmers. “Lee” will accept Herr Thomas’ advice and choose this pur- suit because it requires more grey matter than any other occupation. Because of the demand and need for nurses and in response to the plea sent out by the American Red Cross Society, Elsie Tucker, Floy Sexauer, Shearl Miller, Abby Houser and Bernice Walter will enter the service and become very prominent pro- fessional nurses. St. Clair Burden assisted by Nellie Shan- er Burden will hold a lucrative position at Superintendent of a Deaf and Dumb Asy- lum in the Sandwich Islands Previous to this time, Saint will have made repeated at- tempts, all in vain, to compound a gas which inhaled into the cranium would keep the tongue in perpetual motion. Mignon Hummell will go to Washington as Senator from Ohio and the reduction of the present high cost of living will be due to the efforts of Senator Hummel. Mariam Grove will graduate from the Medical College at Ohio State and become a noted brain specialist. Elizabeth Schleich- er will succeed Miss Mowery as Instructor of Music in the Public Schools of Lancaster. It is utterly impossible to make out the next. All that is distinguishable is that it concerns Pearl Spears, Bess Baker, and Fannie Lake. Evidently the fate of Fan- nie and Bess has already been sealed as we know Pearl’s to be, and may they have all happiness in the field of Matrimony. The Salvation Army will need very ef- ficient workers in the future and under the leadership of Ralph Brenner and Harry McClanahan it will occupy a higher place in the social development of America- Several of the class will embark upon the Sea of Matrimony shortly after grad- uation. Among them will be Nellie Beh- rens and Frances Chapman. The former will marry a scientific farmer, and the lat- ter a lawyer of Cincinnati. About the same time the marriage of Mary E. Hood to a graduate of the class of 1914 will be solemnized. Isabelle Work will also test the value matrimonial life and after making three different trials finally give up in despair and in partnership with Marie Deffen- baugh supervise a Bachelor Girl’s Board- ing House on Fountain Square. Teddy Roosevelt’s Volunteer Army shall be greatly strengthened by the addition of several stalwart High School braves, Har- old Rohrbaugh, Harold Hughes, Ross George, Leo Hartman, George Burnstein, Frank Graf and Douglas Grimm. Elizabeth Kent and “Pud” McCleery, af- ter taking the required training will join the U. S. Aviation Corps and make some re- markable flights across Buckeye Lake. Paul Spears will investigate many trades and finally open a Beauty Parlor on Fift’ Ave., New York, making a specialty of Wigs and Switches of every hue imagin- able. Among his lady assistants will be Margaret Shonting and Myrtle Jane Horse- man. Mrs. Grace Me Morris Shott will establish a great reputation and win a fortune for herself as cartoonist for the Chicago Tri bune. Gerald Hewetson will live for the sole purpose of bettering the moral conditions of humanity and is now spending his leisure hours in preparing the lectures which will make him a famous reformer. His mor soul inspiring subjects will be “Why Don’t Smoke Cigarettes” and “The Frater- nity as a Public Menace.” The Self-Serving Grocery Store carrying everything from a toothpick to a fried chicken will be introduced to Lancaster cit- izens by Miss Brunella Dilger.

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30 MIRAGE Scene:—Madame Parlor. Time:—May 1917. Madame Levinski gazing fixedly into a medium:— Ah, the future is so unusually clear this evening that I feel confident that the desti- ny and future fortune o+ class of T7 will be revealed. Yes, the globe, is becoming clear and I am able to distinguish more and more the signs. First is being revealed the fu- ture of the one who guided us safely thru the sea of school tribulations but almost became stranded himself, our President Russell Lloyd. He shall continue to be a leader and will be recognized as such by the National Government. Before twenty years have passed he will have assumed his duties as Ambassador to China and hav- ing become very much infatuated with a Chinese heiress he will fall the victim of Cupid’s arrow and marry her for her Or- iental beauty and sense, (cents)- Professor Brasseur, who is to be the dis- tinguished director of a remarkable “Two- Piece” Orchestra will entertain the Presi- dents and greatest citizens of both conti- nents. The personnell of the orchestra will be made up of prominent musicians, Noel Horn and Robert Sharp. But he will attribute his greatest success to the warb- lings of his concert soloist, Viola Thrush. The artistic mind of Harold Mayer will result in his opening an American Dress- making Establishment in Paris, with Eva Kneller and Edythe Cave as private secre- taries. Austin Gibbony, Ralph Beck and Albert Brehnstuhl will become joint owners of a large aeroplane factory in Buenos Ayres, which will average fifteen hundred mach- ines in daily output since the aeroplane will become the chief means of travel for flighty people. That “to love is to sacrifice” will be th( motto of Forest Rose Brandt for she must wait patiently through ten long years until “Tub” Silbaugh graduates and finds it op- portune to marry. Professor Dilger and his wife Relva will probably find life most exciting in Rock- bridge where “Dig” will accept the posi- tion of Professor of Chemistry and Physics in Rockbridge High School, and spend his leisure hours in coaching the “Varsity” team. But now the globe is cloudy. We must wait until it becomes clear. Ah! now I have the meaning of the indistinctness, for it bodes evil. Alas! Ruth Derbyshire and Dorothy Rarick have a sad future! They will be unfortunately disappointed in their love affairs and spend most of their life in a convent. Dorothy will find that this is the only sure cure for “giggles.” Agnes Bookwalter, Grace Friesner, Ruth Meeker and Jeanette Spears are forming a private Corporation, and after buying a large farm in Alaska, will take up agricul- tural pursuits and perfect a variety of skinless onions. George Rutherford will graduate from Harvard and spend the remaining years of his life in Rome making historical research to ascertain whether Virgil was the true author of the Aenead. But there is one member of the class des- tined to become the most popular 20th cen- tury novelist, Lawrence Raymond Derry. Derry’s greatest sensation will be a book of two thousand pages and two hundred and fifty beautiful illustrations entitled “The Girls I Left Behind Me in The West.” Fate will indeed smile upon “Dotty” Noles and give him boundless wealth be- cause of the inventive trend of his brain. His discovery of a “Patent Hair Restorer” based on his own experience will go far be- yond any similar attempts made in previous history. Ralph Eiman and Roy Sheets will find especial solace in Dotty’s Patent am therefore travel extensively as agents ft Nole’s Hair Restorer- “Hal” Phillips evidently decided upon his future career because of his decided success in editing the school paper for he will become editor of the National Wo- man’s Suffrage Journal which has its head- CLASS PROPHECY Levinski’s Spiritual

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MIRAGE Robert Louis Stevenson, having received the appointment as Captain-in-Chief of the First Submarine Passenger Line running from New York to Liverpool will in his first trip have as passengers, Rev. Hugh Silbaugh, D. D-, A. X. Z., Hon. Charles Rose, William Jennings Bryan and Henry Ford, who will attend the National Peace Conference to be held at Geneva, Switzer- land. After Hugh returns he will resume his duties as Pastor of the First Baptist Church in Sugar Grove. Marcella McClenaghan will teach sch several years and then marry an Italian Prince. How romantic! Herr Thomas, having retired from the teaching profession quite early in life, will give his undivided attention to farming and will be succeded by Herr Halderman as Instructor of Deutsch. But Harold will find life so monotonous that he will seek fame by writing a number of German- English songs such as “My Nose, She be Big Like a House,” etc. etc. Ruth Pierce wil suffer the singular fate of falling off the Y Bridge at Zanesville and of being heroically rescued by a prom- inent widower of that city, who will later marry her. Edwin Ruff will return to England as the distinguished valet of Lord Balfour and will be accompanied as far as London by Verena Lois White, who will spend several years abroad trying to reform the English School System. George Young will accept the Presi- dency of the “Retired Farmers’ and Bach- elors’ Association of Fairfield County”, while Ralph Strigle having surpassed all ex- pectations, will become an authority on Perfect Complexions and Youthfulness. Louise Wilson and Florence Stephens will carry on the work of the Humane So- ciety in Carroll and found a Home for Homeless rats and mice. But now the future is growing dark and 'I can scarcely read the fortune of the mighty Senior Guy Jackson. He will be a perfected example of a—a grace—now it is clearer. He will be a perfected example of a graceful dancer and his income as a Dancing Master will be so much that he will adopt Seven Homeless Waifs and thus pc form his fatherly and brotherly duty by raising Seven Little Guys to cherish his name forever. But alas! the medium has been taxed too strenuously and the globe has broken. Let each member perform his respective task so completely that his Alma Mater will be renowned throughout the world and the Class of 1917 will be an exceedingly bril- liant stone in the Alumni necklace of L. H. S. —Eleanor Pickering, ’17. w