Lancaster High School - Mirage Yearbook (Lancaster, OH)

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(Class Prnpltrrit By M. Leila Saine. Autumn had quietly merged into winter; winter, with its harsh blasts, had given way to spring, and now spring was imperceptibly gliding into summer—that wonderful, never-to-be-forgotten summer of 1935. It was a bright, warm day late in May. such a day as can exist only in a region with climatic conditions such as prevail in Kentucky. Stillness reigned over the little town of Wellington—stillness broken only by the singing and quarreling of the birds in the old apple tree just outside my open window. The curtain softly swayed in the breeze, bringing the refreshing fragrance of roses, which were just bursting into bloom. My thoughts were deep in the past. Was it possible that nearly twenty years had passed since that day in June when we had stood on the stage of the Lancaster High School auditorium and received our diplomas? Where were all those old classmates? What were they doing? My reverie was suddenly disturbed by the shrill whistle of the postman afar off down the street. On he came, and. was he—? Yes, he was turning in at the gate! I hastened out to meet him. There were papers and business letters for Uncle Bob, and a magazine for me. The magazine was soon leafed over and I was about to lay it aside, when a letter dropped from it. I eagerly tore it open, and devoured the contents, for letters were not an every-day occurrence in that out-of-the-way town. This was the letter, or rather note: “New York, N. Y., May 26, 1935. 'Dear Old Friend: “Beyond a doubt, you remember the pact made by us ears ago, when each of us promised to do anything within cr power for the other, if ever a time should come when either should need help. I need you now, and will meet you Saturday night at the Grand Central. “Lovingly, ELIZABETH TOWT.” Imagine my surprise and delight to hear once more, after seven years, from “Liz.” But what could she want ? Surely some serious trouble must have befallen her! With all haste possible. I gathered a few belongings together and set out for New York City, fully expecting to find some of her nearest relatives dead or dying. But when I alighted from the train, there stood Elizabeth, smiling as brightly as ever! Not one word would she tell me until we reached her home on Fifth Avenue. Then she unfolded her plan. She had just purchased a beautiful new yacht, and was exceed- ingly anxious to try it. So she had arranged to take a long cruise, expecting to be gone at least four months, and to stop at interesting points along the way. The note was intended to arouse and excite my anxiety, for then she knew that I would come at once. Accordingly, in exactly four days we were ready to begin our trip. We were standing on deck, waving farewell to some of

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man’s number twelves. May you fill Howard’s shoes as well as he has during the past year. Germany is looking for gunboats to use in the present war. so. Bill,” here is an op- portunity to make use of your inheritance-. Item 11—We bequeath to Ralph Webster the ability to get wise, now possessed by Phil Floyd, who has succeeded in graduating. Item 12—To Miss Perfect we bequeath the patience of Job,” to be used at times, but especially when R. Webster is present at the Civic League meetings. Item 13—To the girls who expect to be future voters, we recommend Mr. Thomas’ forthcoming work, to be called “The Female of the Species,” also his beautiful essay, to be entitled “Is High Thinking Compatible with Low-neck Dressing ?” Item 14—To our fond and loving teachers, we bequeath our memory. As years roll by and each succeeding class passes through these portals into a life of strife, may you recall the class of 1915 with fondest memories. Item 15—To our efficient agriculture teacher, Mr. Drinkle, we bequeath a bottle of hair tonic, to be used in growing a mustache, so that he can be distinguished from a pupil of the school. Item 16—To Mr. McCandlish, we bequeath a nickel with tails on both sides, so that in “flipping the coin” with Mr. Hickson he may be sure to win. We also wish him to take our advice and never gamble over the fairer sex. Item 17—To the school, we bequeath such fixtures as Red” Goss and “Toot” Groff, who or.ce upon a time lie- longed to the class of ’15. Our sentiments are those of the poet of old, who exclaimed: Remove not these ancient landmarks. Item 18—And, separately, we make the following indi- vidual bequests: Our class president. Fred Sexauer, leaves his chair of honor and wreath of smiles to his successor: Lucile Southgate leaves “City Life as Seen in Cincinnati,” in seven volumes. On account of the great amount of money and other valuables entailed in this will, we nominate and appoint the School Board as executors of this will. In testimony whereof, the class of 1915 have hereunto set their hand and signature this fourteenth day of April, in the year of our Lord, nineteen hundred and fifteen. THE SENIOR CLASS. By Harry W. Myers. The aforesaid document, purporting to be the last Will and Testament of the Senior Class of Lancaster High School, is, on this eleventh day of June, 1915, admitted to probate. S. H. LAYTON, Judge Superior Court, Lancaster High School.

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Elizabeth’s friends, when the burly form of a policeman rushed on board. Goodness! What could he want? But already Elizabetn had recognized him, and rushed forward to greet Phil Floyd, policeman and detective on the aero- plane force of New York City. Before he left he informed us that “Der” Vorys’ second article on The Other Side to the Fraternity Question” had just appeared in the Atlantic Monthly. In a few hours we had left the harbor far behind and were approaching a little island. As the boat drew nearer, the place appeared to have no inhabitant and Elizabeth suggested land'ng and exploring it, which we did. A dense wood grew quite close to the water’s edge, but, nothing daunted, we started on our tour of investigation. We had only gone a short distance when we came upon a clearing with a large house in the center. No human being could be seen, so we went on, right up to the very door. But lo! the door opened and two women stood there. Something was strangely familiar about their faces! And then they spoke, and we recognized Helen Weiss and Martha Hadebaugh! They were both w'd ws. their husbands having died of a terrible plague, and their only companions in th«s dreary place were a poodle and a canary. Elizabeth asked them to accompany us on the cruise, and they were only too glad to accept. So. after two days, we set out again, this time with Martha, Helen, the poodle and the canary. Martha found a New York paper which Phil had left on the yacht and read this startling announcement from the advertising columns: ‘Talks to the Talkless—Every Wednesday at 2:30 p. m. We absolutely guarantee that any individual taking this course will be able, in three weeks, to converse fluently on any subject whatever; no knowledge of the subject re- quired.—Marion Pierce.” 2 In a few days we reached Paris and here we decided to stay several days. Helen and I set out on a shopping expe- dition. and whom should be meet but Marcillete Stukey! She shyly confided to us that she was expecting to announce her engagement in a short time, but couldn’t quite decide between Hastings. “Shelly,” and an Italian prince. They had all three laid their hearts at her feet the evening before. Hastings and Russel Saunders were both high in diplo- matic circles in France and veritable lions among the fair sex. Oh, and did you know, she quickly said, that Clar- ence Creighton is Russel’s valet and most devoted com- panion? Oh, yes, and ‘Muggs’ Burnett is a noted French modiste.” “Well, of all things! Will wonders ever cease?” ejacu- lated Helen. Leaving the shop, we were hurrying back to our hotel, when we noticed great excitement all about us. Why was everybody so disturbed? The newsboys were yelling lustily. Finally Helen, who had studied French in her spare time on the island, translated the stray bits of conversation. The world’s greatest dentist, I)r. Orvel Blazer, had discovered a marvellous kind of glue. It could be used for a variety of purposes, but the most prominent was that of applying it to a set of false teeth. It entirely eliminated the slightest possibility of swallowing them in one’s sleep. All of the crowned heads of Europe were using it.” Orvel had always been noted for his stick-to-it-iveness. As we passed on, we saw a great crowd gathered at an intersection of the streets. A form, gesticulating wildly, was swaying violently to and fro on an upturned banana- crate. Horrors! It was none other than Florence Belt, airing her views on “How to Make Your Husband Remain at Home in the Evenings.” She was ably assisted by Jo Thomas. At last we reached the hotel, and found that while we