La Porte High School - El Pe Yearbook (La Porte, IN)

Text from Pages 1 - 56 of the 1907 volume:

Whatever your wants are—be it a Spring Suit or a Bath Robe or some- thing i n Furnish- ings, or say a Nobby Straw Hat you 11 find our stock complete and u p- to-date. How Are Your Eyes? Perhaps you’re doctoring for headaches—it’s only your eyes. Perhaps you re worrying about your eyes—it’s only poor glasses. ‘Poor glasses are simply wrong glasses, badly fitted, carelessly tested—improper lenses, etc. We arc positive we can give you Glasses that will rest and help your eyes. We grind them careful- ly—we fit them scientifically — that’s what has made us pre-eminent in the optical business of this section. Our Mr. Ethelred Curtis, Opt. D., will give you his person- al attention. Satisfaction Guaranteed. Oberreich Arnold LnPorte, Indiunn Jewelers nnd Opticians Julius Barnes ®. Co. . = 711-713 Michigan Avenue —:■■■— ‘Dry Goods, Carpets, Millinery, Ladies' Suits, 'Basement Department re-opened TPith a stock of house furnishing supplies. A[eivs is what you take a paper for. 75hQ Argus=Bulletin will give you the news—all of it. Every Page a NEWS Page. o r X Bring Us Your Work SQUIRES ©. LAY JEWELERS AND OPTICIANS South of the Court House j A Pointer on the Pointed Toe Pointed Oxfords are universally worn. There are all kinds of points, from the extreme to the conservative. They are made with room for the toe—that’s the point. Reliable Always.—614 Main. Kelling’s Shoe Store CLASS OF ’07 6 LAPORTE HIGH SCHOOL REVIEW. THE HIGH SCHOOL REVIEW Published monthly at the LaPorte High School during school year. Terms: Seventy five cents per year, in advance. Single copies, ten cents. Editor .................... Assistant Editor........... Exchange Editor ........... Artist ..................... Business Manager .......... Assistant Business Manager ........ Vernon W. Francis ............ Alfred Link ............ Vera Smith ........ Wm. Waterhouse Wm, Edward Frankinburger ......... Kenneth Osborn OFFICERS OF THE CLASS OF 1907. President .................................... Vera Smith Vice President ............................... H. R. Hook Secretary and Treasurer...................... Florence Cole Class Colors, Red and Black. Class Motto, Veritas vincit. The Last Will and Testament of the Class of ’07. (Prelude.) Our hearts are full of love for ye—dear teachers. This parting is a painful thing—our teachers. But now when after all these years Filled with suffering and sometimes tears— If now, in all submission still We leave with you our single will. And if some kind advice we give. Oh please allow us still to live. LA PORT E HIGH SCHOOL REVIEW. 7 To one. we know not what to say, For what we would we must not. Nay Still we speak for your own sake, If you will coach and he a fake. Conic, smile, we meant not to be gruff. Hut first, dear one, you must learn to bluff. To another this advice we dedicate, It’s hard to speak, but it is fate— We must. Hut how the subject to approach? Tis no simple matter of a coach. Well, you must know ere you can rest. Use Violet Talc., for it is best. Then there are those who love the dance, The dreamy waltz—soft strains—perchance A stolen hug or word of fond affection. Now how can you obtain perfection? Just learn and be not shy or coy. Learn as we did. girl and bov. Now to lower regions we descend And hold our breath lest we offend. And doing so incur the wrath Of he who the C). K. slips hath In great profusion. Come, let’s go F.re we are collared here below. And cornered for a recitation. Either the rest need no advice (Then if we spoke of prejudice We’d be accused). Or what We feel we ought to say, is not For publication—just quite fit, So now we’ll quit. (Will.) The members of class of ’07 realizing the uncertainty of school life, and being aware of the fact that the day of our graduation is drawing nigh, do hereby make, ordain, publish and declare the following to be our last Will and Testament, hereby revoking any and all other wills by us heretofore made. 8 LAPORTE HIGH SCHOOL REVIEW. Item ist. We give, devise and bequeath all those who entered the high school with the class of 07 in 1903, and have not more than forty (40) credits, to the Freshman class. Item 2nd. We give, devise and bequeath all those who entered with us aforesaid and have hot more than eighty (80) credits, to the Sophomore class, to be their absolute property forever. Item 3rd. To the beloved Juniors, we bequeath all those who entered with us as aforesaid and have not enough credits to graduate. Note:—The above and foregoing be- quests do not include articles and property hereafter men- tioned in special bequests. Item 4th. The benches occupied by ns for the last year we bequeath to the Juniors, to he held by them for one year. Item 5th. 'I'he library, consisting of books on graft, base ball and foot ball, dime novels, and magazines, we give, devise and bequeath to the school at large and John A. Wood and Arthur Deamer are hereby named as trustees to see that this bequest is properly cared for and protected. Item-6th. To J. W. McLennan we give, devise and be- queath the sum of $5.20. to be used solely and alone, and for no other purpose or purposes, than to purchase every Sun- day for a period of two years one copy of the Comical Sec- tion of the Chicago American, for the sole use and benefit of A. M. Otwell. who delights and revels in reading the same. Item 7th. To C. M. Luce we give, devise and bequeath one thousand (1,000) boxes of cigars, (each box containing one hundred (100) cigars and costing not more than $2.00 per box), he having shown great ability and desire for {he use of cigars at the base ball game at South Bend. John A. Wood is hereby appointed to take under his charge and cus- tody, said cigars, and it shall be his duty to see that said Luce does not smoke over five boxes in one week. Item 8th. To J. W. McLennan we give, devise and be- queath the following books, to-wit: Baron Munchausen’s Adventures: Robinson Crusoe: Anderson’s Fables; Gulli- ver’s Travels: Hyde’s English Grammar, and Hulverson’s Manual on Pronunciation of the English Language, the LAPORTE HIGH SCHOOL REVIEW. 9 same to he used by him to obtain information for his speech- es at the opening exercises on Wednesdays. Item 9th. To Miss Lydia E. Kohn we give, devise and bequeath two hundred yards of pink ribbon, to he used for her own benefit in making pink bows. Item iotli. We bequeath to C. M. Luce, in trust how- ever, the sum of $500.00, to be used to purchase each and every new love story in publication. Said money and said stories to he used for the sole benefit of Miss Anna Sophia Hunter. We hope she will profit thereby. Item nth. To II. C. Noe we bequeath two safety razors and $10.00, to he used to buy new blades for the same. Item 12th. To Arthur Deamer we give, devise and be- queath forty-three (43) feet of one and one-half inch rub- ber hose, to be used solely and alone for spanking Fresh- men. et al. Item 13th. To the II011. Frank Bohland the class does hereby give, devise and bequeath $10.00, to be used by him for no other purpose than for obtaining High School tab- lets. We hope hereby to benefit the many friends of the class who have suffered through his misdemeanors. Item 14th. To A. M. Otwell we also bestow $5.00. which shall be used bv him to purchase the Kimona Monthly Gazette (a Borneo paper), for the betterment of the said person’s science. Item 15th. As a special gift we give, devise and, be- queath-to A. M. Otwell 12 tons of ruled Lenox Bond paper. This paper is to be used solely for writing out “A. M. O. O. K.” slips, which is said to be Otwell’s favorite sport. To facilitate the carrying out of this sport, we bequeath to said ()twell 4 gross of “penny pencils” and two knives, the blades of which are not to be more than 8 inches in length. If. however, at anv time the Board of Education shall consider that said Otwell is taking too much time for writing out “O. K.” slips we bequeath an automatic “O. K.” slip machine, capable of manufacturing 450 slips per minute under ordi- nary circumstances. This machine shall be purchased out of the sum hereafter set aside in Item 16. Item 16th. We hereby have the sum of $100.00 set aside, and placed under the custody of J. Burns, to be used IO LAPORTE HIGH SCHOOL REVIEW in purchasing an “O. K.” slip machine, as stated in the last foregoing bequest. Item 17th. To the beloved Juniors we give the right to fly their flag during the last week of school of the school year 1890-190®. Item 18th. We nominate and appoint John A. Wood and the Hoard of Education as executors of this our Last Will and Testament. Item 19th. All articles, junk, etc., etc., not mentioned heretofore, we bequeath to the school at large, to he taken indiscriminately by any and all persons enrolled in the High School during the year 1907 and 1908. OUR TEACHERS—HOW AND WHERE THEY EX- PECT TO SPEND THEIR VACATION. Ottvell:—Extended trip to the islands of the Southern Pa- cific including stops at Borneo, Java, New Guinea and Mallacca. MacLennan :—Coach White Sox ball team. Deamer•:—Stay at home and tend baby. Xoe:—Break in a few more broncoes. Hunter:—Spend summer at Grassy Creek. Illinois. Kohn:—Visit White City. Simons:—Go to tanneries ( ?) at Milwaukee. Wood:—Go to Europe for seven days and visit 54 schools. Hailiman:—Stay at home and feed the chickens, and chew “square deal.” Luce:—Make hav near Bluff ton. Poole:—Travel with Conreid Co. Mary had a little lamb. She fed it very well, She gave it a stick of dynamite And blew it all to------- Little pieces about as big as this ().—Ex. “Chick” Martin was considerably troubled at the track meet—he tried his best to find out what time was made in the shot put, but could not do so. LA PORT Ii HIGH SCHOOL REVIEW. 11 The High Mogul HITHERTO UNPUBLISHED PLAY BY WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE. (Unearthed by Review Correspondent in London.) Act I. Scene: Private office of High Mogul. II is Highness, secretary, retainers and a youth dis- covered as the curtain rises. Sir Boisterous:—Your pleasure for a moment, sir, all hail. High Mogul:—What now is this? Sir Boisterous:—If to my home you’ll let me phone— High Mogul:—How now; must every smiling youth in man’s attire—must every vain and unthrashed child wax handy with our telephone? Sir Boisterous:—But sir. a moment’s grace I pray, ’til I explain. But scarce an hour ago, I was sore threatened with a whipping, and by no less a man than our own Prince— . High Mogul:—And had he carried out his threat—I d praise the deed. Sir Boisterous:—’Sturb me not ‘till I have done, for in this just and worthy cause must I proceed to plead my case. This prince of all that which he see's—for on that which passes behind his face lie’s no control, and if a wily Fresh- man outwits “Boston Mac” and so escape detection, and ’tis never known, why then it s plain that over this is no con- trol. This prince then sir made threats most violent upon my precious person, and stated as his reason High Mogul:—Various crimes, or I’m mistaken. Sir Boisterous:—Nay, sir, but from my home he claim- ed permission—my mother, sir. had expressly ordered him to lay it on, he said. He close pursues, and now I beg that 12 LAPORTE HIGH SCHOOL REVIEW. I may ask my home by means of telephone if this be true. May I proceed? High Mogul:—Aye, proceed, but cut it short or you’ll be canned. (Enter D’Mer, Prince of II. S.) D'Mcr:—What, bo! where is the culprit. Mere I have a strap of fine proportions, and wears that out. I’ll use my hand, but what this childish bore will I chastise. Come yield him, but to justice o’er. High Mogul:—I’ll gladly yield him. For who wants a noisy babbling brook within one’s sanctum. D'Mcr:—And who would stay a Christian with one so fresh within a mile; come man, but hand him o’er—I’ll hand the rest. • High Mogul:—I will. But wait, we’ll hear our actions praised on high by the lad’s own mother, then we ll see— Sir Boisterous:—Ha, ha. base wretches ye. Ye would deceive an honest man. Hear then, what she said: “Of this I have no knowledge, nor have I grown profuse and free with my franchise to spank my children.” This, then, proves ye a wretch, D’Mer and your accomplice—come yield me my freedom, ’ere I raise an uproar. D'Mcr:—’Fore God. if be begins to roar, we’ll have to let him free. Xo man could stand the like for one brief instant. High Mogul:—I’d like to spank him, yet, if he but open that gab. we’re lost. D'Mcr:—Well, let's counsel with each other while we’re here, on other matters. Willst let the Seniors fly their paltry rag? High Mogul:—What! Xevah! (exit Sir Boisterous.) D'Mcr :—I la, so I thought, and so am pleased. What, ho! he hath escaped us. The wretch is gone. High Mogul:—Let us pursue with all acceleration. D'Mcr:—And when he’s captured, woe to him. Let’s go. (Exit.) Act IT. Scene:—Cell in lower part of H. S. (Domestic Science room). LAPORTE HIGH SCHOOL REVIEW. 13 Enter Lucci, D’Mer and the High Mogul, Bearing Sir Boisterous prisoner. Sir Boisterous:—’Gainst this outrage I do protest with all vehemence. D'Mer:—And if ye do I swear I’ll cram this down your throat, (shows gas hose.) Lucci:—Have aught among you got a match, my “butts’ is out. High Mogul:—Oh, fudge, this is no time to talk of smoke; come grab the rascal by the neck and lay him o’er yon chair. D'Mer:—That done, then I’ll begin, and work my graft with strong and hearty will as well as arm. Sir Boisterous:—I do defy you all. Spank, if you will. But what care I? Think ye 1 am but a child? Come, I'm made of sterner stuff than ye. Ye cowards three, aye three. And does it take three mighty men to ply the strap on one- poor hoy? Shan’t 1 call upon some passer by to aid you? Mayhap the janitor will hold my feet while three of you sit on my head. But then, shall’t spank? Oh, come ye coward- ly weaklings, get more help, lest one small hoy does best the three of ye. What? Say, in recognition of your inabil- ity, I will assist you—see? I lay myself across this chair and swear I’ll so remain ’til ye are thru—the three of ye. (Lays himself across chair.) High Mogul:—I’ll take you up my little man and spank. Here, Lucci, fall to. (For five minutes great commotion ami uproar, during which each takes a turn at soaking the victim with a gas hose.) Sir Boisterous:—(Weakly) What, are you thru? I said ye might spank, but next time ye lack exercise, why—cut the lawn at home or make the beds. . D’Mer:—Now let this upon your mind impress the fact that there is yet a law within this school, and we en- force it. If you but ope’ your head for one small yap again the dose will be double. Lucci:—(muses) We’ve worn to rags a good gas hose upon a worthless boy—who’s got a match?—and will it benefit the wretch? Hum, well, who knows? I wonder. � 4 LA FORTH HIGH SCHOOL REVIEW. was the High Mogul e’er spanked like this when he was young? But then that’s treason, that I must not think. High Mogul:—Myself, alone, will I repeat the job for now am 1 convinced that you deserved it all. But busi- ness calls, come, prince, let’s go. Now about those wily Seniors—have they a right to live or no? (exit D’Mer and High Mogul.) Lucci:—Poor kid. 1 kind o’ sympathize with you— myself once when a boy was 1—but come, we’ll go. I’ll not disclose that which 1 almost said. Take my advice, my lit- tle lad. and act not quite so fresh until ye hold the upper hand. Remember this, as I tell you now, justice in a school is oft’ that which those in command, influenced by their own desires, are powerful enough to do. That’s a tip both good and straight from me—what, dear boy, you really have a match? I’d almost love you for that alone. Come. I'll tell you more as we proceed, (exit) Act III. Scene:—Home of Sir Boisterous. Enter Sir Boisterous, musing. Sir Boisterous:—This vain and worn out place, for- sooth. it suits me not. ’Tis but an empty shell—a husk held out in place of corn—how one will answer back in biting words when collared for misdeeds. One plans to bring an ocean of chagrin upon the teachers head. But, ah. in vain. For ’scaping Otwell: there is Luce to call me down, and then Deamer, then you have yet to deal with Mac. and so it goes down the line ’til soon one comes to grief—is captured and most completely tanned.—No more against the rules of school will I trespass—that is, if there’s danger of being caught. Besides, methinks I’ll not have energy to walk for some time, or having the energy. I’ve not the courage to brave the pain. (Curtain.) —J. R. Hulvcrson. ’07. “Chick Martin would make a good egg dodger. Stu- dents in the Assembly Room succeeded in hitting him but once out of twenty-seven trials. ()f course they only threw books. LAPORTE HIGH SCHOOL REVIEW. cValedictory. Farewell, farewell, dear High school. Thou hast served thy purpose true. Thou hast made thyself immortal. And proved thyself “true blue.” Thou hast charged our minds with knowledge, And we must grateful he, For thy very many blessings; Yet all without a fee. Our hearts are growing heavy As we leave thee once for all. O, were it that we all could meet Again with thee next fall. Tho years may dim our memory. Clearly we’ll hear the H. S. yell. Dear school we leave thee now fore’er, Farewell, dear school, farewell. —C. E. F., '07. LA PORT E HIGH SCHOOL REVIEW. 16 JJHkZlKS SOUTH BEND 6, LA PORTE 4. On April 27th the La Porte High School base ball team was defeated by the South Bend 1 ligh School team at South I'end. by the close score of 6 to 4. The game was very ex- citing, as it was hard to tell who would be the winner until the last man was out in the ninth inning. La Porte was first at bat and made a good start, as usual. Frankenberger hit the air three times, but the South Bend third baseman muff- ed Brook’s easy grounder and threw a mile over the first baseman’s head when he did get it. The latter caught the' fever immediately after getting the ball and threw high at the third baseman to catch Brooks. The latter scored on the errors. South Bend scored twice in the second on a hit and a couple of errors and once in the third and fourth inn- ings. LaPorte added two in the fourth. 'Kretjci scoring on Pegknv’s hit. while the latter stole third and scored on Link’s smash. In the next round, LaPorte tied the score. Fitzpatrick crossed the rubber on Frankenberger’s clean drive to the outfield. Nothing doing until the eighth inning. The first two men up for South Bend went out by infield plays, but the next man knocked a speedy grounder which Boh land played too long. The man was safe with two gone and the danger was thought to be about over, when the South Bend catcher came to bat and knocked a clean three bagger. Hoelocker fielded the ball to Kretjci and the latter in an endeavor to get the man at third threw a little too high for Peglow to get the ball, the runner scoring on the LA PORTE H. S. BASE BALL TEAM. ’07 LAPORTE HIGH SCHOOL REVIEW. 18 play. LaPorte went out in order in her half and the final score stood 6 to 4 in South Bend’s favor. The LaPorte team lined up as follows: Frankenberger .................Left field Brooks .......................Short stop B0I1 land ................'. First base Kretjci......................Second base Peglow (captain) .............Third base Link ....................... Center field Hoelocker ....................Right field G. Martin ...................... Catcher Fitzpatrick ..................... Pitcher The game by innings: LaPorte ................. 1 002 1 000 o—4 South Bend ................ 02 1 1 0002 —6 PLYMOUTH 6, LAPORTE 4. In a closely contested game the LaPorte High School base hall team was defeated by the Plymouth High School team at Plymouth on Saturday afternoon. May 4th, by the score of 6 to 4. The LaPorte team should have won the game, as they played equally as well as Plymouth in the field and outbatted them almost two to one. Plymouth’s team was a strong one and LaPorte knew they would have to go some to heat them. In the first inning Frankenberger singled but was caught asleep off first base by the pitcher, and tagged out by the first baseman. The next two went out and Plymouth came to bat. Two men had been retired when the third man put a little grounder to Fitzpatrick. He fielded the ball and shot it to first. Hunko Boh land was somewhat scared at the girls directly back of him and thought this a good place to drop the ball, which he did in a very cute way, although it proved costly to LaPorte, for the Plymouth boys scored three times after what should have been the third out. Bohland says the girls had him on the wagon. LaPorte could not score until the sixth although they had a good chance in the fifth. In the latter round with two out the bases were full ami Peglow to bat. The first ball that Kuhn, the Plymouth twirler, fired he cracked on the nose. The ball went far out in to right field, but the LA PORT Ii HIGH SCHOOL REVIEW. 19 fielder froze on to it, and LaPorte’s hopes were again blighted. In the sixth. “Smiling Fit ” scored because the second baseman was too busy watching the smile and miss- ed a throw from the first baseman. That was all until the fatal eighth. A couple of hits just over the infield by Ply- mouth and an error by LaPorte allowed the Plymouth team to score three times again. In the ninth inning LaPorte let the balloon go up for a few minutes, but was not able to keep it there. Krctjci was safe on first and Peglow waited for four bad ones and got free transportation to the first station. A. Link displayed his “grafting powers” by nab- bing on to a pretty one that came across the plate and put it safe over the infield. “All Right Kiddow” scored and “De- mentia Baseballia” slid safely to third. “Chic” Martin, not- ed for his wise sayings, thought he’d make his reputation now. and scored the LaPorte captain from third and sent Link to third. Right at this point of the game ‘Chic” show- ed the girls how to lead another fellow a merry chase. The second baseman chased him back towards first and tagged him out. The “grafter on second displayed himself again by taking third and also home during “Chics” performance at first base. G. Martin was not as famous as his predeces- sor and went out by the first base route. The world-renown- ed Frankenstein was the last man to face the Plymouth southpaw llinger. Enie was the first man up. and getting the habit from Link also managed to be the last man up. But poor Enie was not equal to the task. The feminine faces on the first base line was more than he could stand, and he was an easy out for the first baseman, the short stop getting the assist. The final score was 6 to 4 in favor of Plvmouth. The LaPorte team lined up as follows: Frankenberger .. Brooks .......... Bohland ......... Kretjci ........ Peglow (captain) Link ............ F. Martin........ G. Martin ....... Fitzpatrick ..... ..Left field .Short stop . First base Second base .Third base Center field . Right field ... Catcher ... Pitcher 20 LAPORTE HIGH SCHOOL REVIEW. H. R. HOOK LaPorte's Star Athlete. tanner of the Gold Medal at the S. . A. I.. Me I. South Head, bid. LAPORTE HIGH SCHOOL REVIEW. 21 THE 07 N. I. A. L. MEET. The fourth annual track and field meet was held at Notre Dame University, under the auspices of the South Tend High School, on May nth. An immense crowd was present and a great deal of enthusiasm was displayed. I he list of entries was the largest of the four years. The discus hurl was first on the program, and this was won easily by Voting, of Crown Point, who also won the shot put and hammer throw. A. Link, of LaPorte, secured third in the shot put and second in the hammer throw. The 100 yard dash was carried off easily by Hook, of LaPorte, who also won the 220 yard dash and the quarter mile run. Hook was not pushed in either of these races and consequently the time was slow. LaPorte did not scofc in anything else but the broad jump, in which Link secured second and Hook third. LaPorte bid fair to win the meet for a time, and not until the broad jump was over, was the meet really decided. Link and Hook were the only LaPorte men to score points for the locals. LaPorte did not run the relay, owing to complications in the entree list. Starbuck. of Goshen, and Hook, of LaPorte. tied in points for the gold medal, with 16 points each. The schools finished as follows: Goshen 28, LaPorte 23. Crown Point 21, Michigan City 15 , South Bend iopL Hammond 7 , Plymouth 5. Elkhart 3 2. and Warsaw o. Both the championship and relay banners were won by Goshen, as well as the gold medal in the declamation contest in the evening. STATE MEET. At the State Meet, Hook, of LaPorte, secured four points, by getting third in the 100 yard dash and second in the 220 yard. He did not run the quarter mile race. The track was in poor condition, owing to the fact that the day before it had rained hard, and the 100 yard dash was start- ed in a drizzle. Starbuck. of Goshen, also secured four points by getting third in the pole vault and second in the broad jump. 22 LAPORTE HIGH SCHOOL REVIEW. THE CHAMPION OF N. I. A. L_. ’07 LA PORTE UIGII SCHOOL REVIEW. 23 A Glimpse into the Future By Hen I left La Porte one bright sunny clay in June on one ot my extended trips across the continent. Door Village, the thriving metropolis just west of LaPorte, was my destina- tion. and 1 arrived in the great city about 2 o’clock. I made my way carelessly down the asphalt streets (identical to those in my native city) gazing into the show windows of the large department stores for which Door Village is noted. I was greatly astonished, however, when 1 saw a large crowd of interested people staring at what looked like a large sized hack or transfer bus. A stranger, seeing the look of surprise upon my face, told me that it was nothing more than “Brownie” going at the terrific rate of twelve miles an hour in his noted electric, with the dashboard bent double under the heavy strain of holding up his feet. I told the stranger that I «had seen him take similar rides in La- Porte a number of years ago. I wanted to know what “Deacon” was doing now, so enquired of another gentle- man nearby. He told me that McLane’s chief occupation was running his Pope Waverly and telling experienced chaffeurs how to run their machines. (Quite strange that Howard should take up such an occupation). The happy smile on the fellow’s face looked familiar to me and lo and behold it belonged to no other person than II. Fitzpatrick, the boy with “the smile that won’t come off.” That dear old smile had attracted many a fair lassie in the good ’07 days. Fitz then told me that he was a prosperous farmer liv- ing at the edge of town, and even invited me out to spend the first night of my travels with him. I finally accepted, and can say now that I never spent a more joyous night than that one. While waiting for supper I picked up a b(x k lying on the library table, and the word that took my eye was A. LINK. I knew a person by that name some years before and as 1 opened the book my hair stood on end as I saw the word “GRAFT.” Fitz smiled out loud and told me 24 LAPORTE HIGH SCHOOL REVIEW. that Link was in Boot Jack writing many books on that sub- ject as seen by him in the Assembly Room of the La Porte High School. There was no doubt in my mind but what Bohland was the cause of Link’s undertakings. I glanced at another book and saw the word “Debate,” and concluded that John S. Martin must have something to do with that. 1 thought Fitz would know all the particulars and looked to him for information. He said Martin was in Kingsbury, showing the rubes out there how to debate (good position for an energetic young man like John S.). I left Fitz the next morning and concluded to take a little trip down to Union Mills. I was riding along slowly when I saw two girls painting a mountain scene. As I drew nearer to the young artists, I recognized them as Bertha Holmes and Blanche Parkhouse. I was interested in know- ing what success they were having and inquired as to where they were working. I was informed that Gerdes and Brad- bury had set up a studio in Tracy and that Miss 1 lolmes and Miss Parkhouse were working for them, and that they were just completing a pretty mountain scene when 1 came along. I remembered what great pictures they had painted in Mr. Simon’s Art Room, and was not in the least surprised at their success in this line of work. I wanted to reach Union Mills as soon as possible, so went on my way again. On entering the little place, I saw a big sign with the words. “Harry Hoover. Tonsorial Ar- tist.” I opened the door and walked into a neat little shop, and there sat Hoover playing with his hands as usual. We had a long conversation and the course of our talk finally led us to the question as to what all the old members of the class of ’07 were doing. I loover told me that he had receiv- ed a letter from Hook the other day and that he was hap- pily situated with Gladys in New York City, playing the ponies for a living, and making money bv the wholesale. 1 loover also stated that Hank graduated from Yale a couple of years ago and that while there he had carried off the highest honors in the intercollegiate track meets. I did not doubt this in the least, as he used to run like the wind when he was in the high school, especially when he had a cow to scare him by way of incentive. This recalled to my mind LA PORT Ii HIGH SCHOOL REVIEW. 25 how he had easily captured the dashes at Notre Dame in 07 when the Northern Indiana Track Meet was held there, and how he won the gold medal by making sixteen points. I thought it was no more than right to ask Hoover how he was getting along, so inquired as to his success with the razor. He uttered a groan of despair, and with eyes turned upwards and with quivering lips said that the only person that would come to him was Lyn Barnes, and that as long as he had nothing to shave ( ?), he had not been there for a long time. I told Hoover to cheer up. that the worst was yet to come. I gave him a parting farewell and went out of the door with a heavy heart, as I was sorry that Harry was having such a struggle in life. I glanced across the road and saw a millinery store owned by Garwood and Schnurr. I wondered at first bow it happened that Lillian should be situated just across the road from Hoover. Then I thought of the old saying that “Love will find a way, and I was contented. I felt much happier now. as I knew Hoover would have some one to console him in his grief. At the same time I wondered where R. Parkhouse was. I walked a couple of blocks down the main thoroughfare when the word. “Chemists,’ took my eye. I resolved to find out who was owner of the estab- lishment and entered the place with a bold front. 1 left the door open when I entered and the first words that greeted me were, “Now see here; you ought to know better than to leave that door open.” I recognized the person as being A. M. Otwell, the man who could give out O. K. slips faster than the pupils could take them from him. Over to my left I saw a tall dark complexioned youth, and recognized him as being Claire Fail, when he said. “How are you. kid?” I enquired into their business and Claire said he and Otwell were in partnership, and had built up a thriving business. At the same time I wondered where B. S. Gerdes was, but was much consoled when he entered the room inquiring as to the location of some II. 2 S. attar of roses in disguise. When I heard that symbol, I said Good bye in a hurry and left the place before Prof. Otwell could offer me an O. K. slip. . . I had seen enough of Union Mills for this time, so jumped into an auto and took a ride over to Mill Creek. I 26 LAPORTE HIGH SCHOOL REVIEW. wanted to gather a little information before going around the city to see the sights so entered a printing house. George Raymond Hulverson with an important walk and a pen in hand stepped up to me and asked me if he could do any- thing for me. I told him he couldn’t do me for anything, but that he might be able to furnish me with some informa- tion as to the location of a number of other old chums. First of all I wanted to know where Alexander was. 1 was not in the least surprised when he told me Harold was “devil” in the establishment, and yet 1 was not able to figure out how such a fat man as Alexander could successfully hold down a job of that importance. George informed me that he was editor and part owner of the printing house, and 1 knew he was making a success of it as he was one time the editor of the LaI'orte High School Review. To give me an idea as to the nature of the paper printed by the firm, George sent the “devil” after a recent issue of the pa- per, and handed it to me. “Mill Creek Wind Shooter” was the name and I glanced up and down the columns in search of news that might be interesting to me. In staring head- lines I saw the words, “()range Grove Devasted by an Earthquake.” 1 was somewhat startled by that news and more so when I saw that Frank Bohland was the heaviest loser. Hulverson ventured to tell me that Frank and Rose had gone to California to live, and I concluded that Boh- land’s last resort now would be to start up his former oc- cupation of “grafting.” There was not a bit of doubt in my mind as to whether or not he would succeed in that un- dertaking. for I knew many a lad in the LaI'orte High School had suffered losses while he was around. I turned over to the sporting page and was looking over the basket ball results when 1 saw the names Y. Smith and M. Smith. The girls’ basket ball team of ’07 in the La- Porte High School was composed mostly of Smiths, and an idea struck me that these two girls might have been mem- bers of that team. I turned to Hulverson for light on the subject and he told me that Margorie and Vera Smith were playing basket hall in Chicago with the University of that little city. In reading the acount of the game they had played against North western. I saw that “Red” had dis- LAPORTE HIGH SCHOOL REVIEW. 27 tinguished herself in playing a great game at center, while Vera had made half the points for her team by throwing baskets in the free throws. I knew these girls were great players, for who wouldn't be after the training they receiv- ed under Coach Luce in 1907. My next stop was at Springville. and as I was about to enter the town I saw some boys playing base ball in a wheat field. Being a great lover of the American sport, I made up my mind to watch the game for a few minutes. The Springfield boys were at bat I was informed, md they were playing their annual series with Pinhook. The Pinhook twirler was throwing snakes of every description around the necks of the Springfield batters, and he had them com- pletely under his mercy. I was anxious to know who he was. and asked a little’ fellow who was standing near and watching the game with great interest. He said that it was Peglow, of Greater LaPorte, and after a while I recognized the fellow as the same one that used to throw the spit ball on the High School Campus, and who at one time was terribly ill with “Dementia Baseballia. 1 went thru the town taking in everything that I could see (and a few that 1 could not), when I met another friend who had been a prominent figure in the High School in the days of '07. It was no less a personage than Otto Zeigler, famous for anything from translating 12th grade German down to reading the Polish language. Without asking him what he was doing in such a big city, he informed me that he was giving German lessons to everybody (Miss Kohn included). I was about to continue on my journey when I saw what looked to me like an ice boat. I had ridden in one of these things myself when a boy and as I had plenty of time I crossed the road and examined the boat. The name of the boat was “Swede. and a very appropriate name I thought, too. when 1 saw Swanson coming out of a large shop. He had helped me to make one when he was only nineteen years old. so I stepped up to him and demanded to know what he was doing. He said that the shop just to our left was all his own and that he was making some of the speediest ice boats in the country. Swede could not have picked out a 28 LAPORTE HIGH SCHOOL REVIEW. better occupation, altho he might have been a good man- ager for the Springivile base ball team. I walked up the street a couple of blocks and met Mabel Anderson. I was still after information, and inquired her as to her success in life. She informed me that she owned the largest hotel in the city and was getting along fine, altho she said that she wished she had gone out west with Fail when he asked her to a few years ago. The next day I arrived in Rolling Prairie, and as I was somewhat lonely among so many strangers I decided to go to the theater. I found out that a show was playing there from a small boy. who told me that it was “She Stoops to Conquer. 1 entered the handsome edifice and purchased one of the best seats in the house. In a few minutes the curtain went up and I became greatly interested in the play. A charming young lady entered into the story of the play, and there was something about her voice that sounded familiar. I concluded that I must be mistaken, and yet every time she spoke, the high pitch and the winning way in which she spoke made me wonder where I had heard that voice before. I asked “Piedum” Bennethum (water carrier in the establishment) if he knew who the leading lady really was. After some time he returned to me with the information that it was Edith Runyan. I re- membered Edith when she went to High School, and I was greatly pleased when I saw she was making a success on the stage. The next day as I was viewing the sights of the city. I ran across B-B-Bo-Bob Hoelocker. He tried awfully hard to tell me what he was doing, and after a conversation of twenty minutes I was able to make out that he was giving lessons in elocution. In my estimation, it was indeed wonderful that a man with a flow of language like a Lake Erie train could suc- cessfully give lessons in elocution. I left Hoelocker and heard him trying to say “Goodbye” when I was over a block away. I entered a banking establishment in that locality and was introduced to Xeal Weaver, owner and president of the bank. He informed me of the fact that he was a suc- cessful business man, but that information was not needed. LAPORTE HIGH SCHOOL REVIEW. 29 as I knew he was the only person capable of making basket ball a success in ’07 when he was manager of the La Porte High School Boys' Basket Ball Team. Why shouldn’t a man make a success of the banking business when even in his youth he could meet expenses of visiting teams when they came to La Porte for contests with the High School of that city? Such a man deserves a leather medal That was tlie last old acquaintance 1 met, and as I was tired and weary after my long journey, 1 hoarded a four o’clock Lake Shore special en route for that far off metropolis of La- Porte, much the wiser for the trip I had taken. —R. J. P.} 07. IIALL OF FAME. Clement Meissner, ’10—Spent several hours in the wilder- ness without company. Prank Bohland. 07-08—“Father” of Graft in the High School. “Chick Martin. ’08—Served as target for students one morning. .-i. .1 . 0 tied I—Celebrated acrobat. Hex Frankenberger—Business manager of H. S. Review. . . W. McLennan—Celebrated orator and base ball coach. B. Gerdes—A disciple of Otwell. C. M. Luce—Girls’ basketball coach. Arthur Deamer—Disciplinarian of Freshmen. H. Carroll Fitzpatrick—Famous “South Paw.” Harold Alexander—T.he fattest ever.” Karl Swanson—Base ball manager. . R. Hook—Dust raiser. Ben Schultz—All day sleeper. V. W. Francis— Champeen” bluffer. George R. Huherson—Bull con merchant. Perry Way—Noted crook. Out of 215 students in the Assembly Room, 214 have fallen victims of spring fever. ()ne lonely Freshie refuses to give in. 30 LAPORTE HIGH SCHOOL REVIEW. The Proud Postmaster. By Samule George Washington Franklin Pearce Lincuti Grant Sherman Whitkum, Jr. Dear Idioter:—i got mi paper al rite i like the owt side of it better an i did tothcr,one. I’m glad tew see u printed mi other leter cauz now i can send yew one ov Sams stories hut hcfor i send it i want tew give yew the names ov a cople ov pepul i want yew tew send papers tew, Ezra Haw- kins, Marier Wayback. Ruben Hograser, Uncle Ben Smith, Fritz Godbrick. Josh Bilkins, Sam Flipp, Pete Bakasta. Molly Krawferd, an Jim Black. Thats al the names i can think ov now may bee next tim i can give yew sum more. Sam Black sed that if he liked the paper hed give hiz yung caff fer a yer ov it but hers Sams story ill rite it just lik hez got it if i can :— It was a cold day in Dec and the grond was covered with sno. In side the little stor gathered afound the stove where they had lied for refuge frum the cold out side, sat a groupe of rustics. It wus mail day but as nearly every one had all ready received and read all the mail that was coming to him they filled their pipes and began to talk with each other. Josh Bilkins the post master sat in his little offic reading the newspapers out of other peoples boxes. From this he was suddenly disturbed by the entry of an old farmer who walked up to the window and asked if there was “eny male for him.” With much grumbling the Post master laid down his paper and handed him his mail. “It seems tew me Josh how az yew cud wate on a feller onct in a while with- out growlin’ yew never ust to do it before yew wuz post master.” “No remarks,” said Josh. “I want yew fellers to understand that I’m employed by the guvment and yew got to respect me.” “Seems tew me yer perty much stuck up jest the same,” responded Ezra Hawkins. “I tell yew what boys I aint slept a sound nite since Josh Bilkins is post mas- ter.” “Whats the mater,” said Jim Black frum his cracker barrel, “nothin said Ezra taking a seat on a handy soap box near by and lighting his pipe. “Only one nite when I wuz tite tew sleep I gess it must ha been after midnite and LAPORTE HIGH SCHOOL ReHeW. 1 ' 31 ' measly cold out side when some one earned up to our door and made so much nois that it woke my ole woman up. she grabs a hold of me an sez sez she wake up Ezra some ones at the door that wants yew hustle up there it woes again mabee its Mariar’s baby got sick hustle up an go fer the doctor az fast as you can. Well sir I got owt ov that bed an pulled on mi pants quicker than yew cud say Jack Rob- inson. Then i run to the door like a white head an there stood Josh Bilkins. I sed sed I whats the mater Josh. He sez sez he “Mattie enough come over to the store to onct hustle up dont stand there all yer there comin” whos comin sez 1. “They are ’ hustle up yew here” well ser I run an got mi gun an started out with Josh over to the store he took me rite in an there he had a lamp a burning and a pack of mail a lay in there pickin it up he sez sez he watch me now an i watched him an he didn’t do a thing but put it in the mail bag than he sez sez he “That’s all ready fer the stage coach but if yew hadn’t come over right away we would have missed it.” Then he toolf a long sigh. Well whats wrong I sez sez 1. “Nothing” lie sez sez he only the rules and regulations say there has got to be some one to see me put the mail in the bag 1 sez sez I “what do yew mean to tell me that yew made me come here just to see you put that stuff in the bag” he sez sez he “no sir the govment mad you an if you go to kickin I’ll set the Guvment after you. under- stand ? I sez sez I vvuz mad but I saw it wuz no use so 1 jest didn’t say nothin but took my gun an went home to bed. At this the party broke up some laughing and others shaking their heads they left the store while Josh Bilkins settled down and read muttering to himself This is what a goy- ment employee gets fer assoatin with common folks. Xo respect to all.” Mi next story will be how Josh Bilkins got his leg pulled. Talers Korners, Mo. Samuel Whitkumb, SR. “Chic” Martin does not seem to have very good control over the pupils when he is in charge. Inquisitive Sophomore Girl:—“I wonder if boys really do wear corsets? % 7,2 LA PORT E men SCHOOL REVIEW. We wish to express our appreciation of the treatment given La Porte and the other schools at the recent track meet held at South Bend. The meet was undoubtedly a suc- cess financially, and several records were broken besides. While the track was not as good as might have been expect- ed. it served its purpose. ()ne bad feature of the meet was the surging of the crowd on the track around the finish; on one instance a runner was interfered with. Such features are unnecessary, and we hope in the future they will be erad- icated. There were several squabbles over caps which were detrimental in a way. but this disturbance was caused by students from Notre Dame, and does not reflect on South Bend. La Porte has always had the reputation of treating opposing teams on the square and in this respect we arc forced to share honors with South Bend, for no team can say that they were not treated square at the recent meet. The time has come once more when another class will leave the school, and with it undoubtedly comes the spirit of intense class rivalry. In accordance with a decree of the Board of Education, the Senior class flag will be hoisted over the school building. The raising of a class flag usually brings about the so-called “scraps.” in which the parties en- gaged often seem to be entirely devoid of reason and forget to observe the rights of others. LAPORTE HIGH SCHOOL REVIEW. 33 Whether or not such will be the case this year, only time can decide, but it may now be said that any “scrap,” any scratches, bruises or injuries will not bring any glory upon the school, the classes engaged and especially not upon those instigating the trouble. It is not a glorious feat for the Seniors to raise their dag as long as they arc under the protection of the Hoard of Education, and in like manner it will not bring glory upon others to act like vandals. The privilege of having their dag raised over the school is an honor to the Senior class, to those who have completed their work in this school. The rest of the school ought to consider this matter, and if they consider that at the proper time they too will be given this privilege, they certainly will not disgrace themselves by acts of rowdyism and vandalism. The school year is nearing its end. Many of us have worked faithfully and honestly, tho’ at times the task has seemed hard, indeed. Concentration of the mind is some- what difficult, and especially so in youth. Youth longs for action, and it is hard to concentrate one’s mind on lessons, when the heart yearns for green fields and shady sylvan retreats. Nexertheless, we have accomplished this, and as we look back over the past year, it should be with pleasant thoughts and a pardonable pride for what we have done. Some of us are entering upon life’s stony way, and altho’ they may leave this school forever, their thoughts must ever turn to the happy days once spent within the house of learn- ing. Few are they who cannot say. “those happy days,” for tho they may seem tiresome hours while life is young, with- in us, still when the hair is gray and the step is faltering, those days will shine thru life’s musty past as the brightest days of our life. May I .—Circus Day. also busy day for teachers. May 18.—Prof. Deamer is bombarded by students who want passes. Presides say they were highly pleased with the monkeys and the little toy balloons they saw. Some even reported to have seen “Ktiocko.” brother of the famous “Jocko.” 34 LAPORTE HIGH SCHOOL REVIEW. LA PORT E HIGH SCHOOL REVIEW. 35 The Seniors at Play. Even Seniors Act Like Human Beings, and arc Not Always Dignified. The scene was at the gymnasium. Bohland, Hulver- son. Ward and Frankinburger were smeared over the mats in various positions of sublime repose. Hulverson was speaking. The first hunting trip I ever took, that was a real one, happened shortly after I arrived in the woods. This is the way it happened—but first 1 must explain about the gun I used. There was an old fellow, a squatter, who had been up there since the Indians moved out. He had a gun that must have belonged to his’Revolutionary ancestor by the way it acted. It was a long muzzle loading affair that shot some- times one way and sometimes another. Frankinburger butted in—“Oh, say, I know that story—” “No you don't, my precious—let me finish— “Well, well. grunted the youthful Frankenburger- stein. “This gun was what they call a residenter—a gun that was made before anyone could remember and must have been made after a last years model when that happened. It could never be depended upon at all. “Say. was it one of the High School Cadet rifles? cried Bohland, now thoroughly aroused. “No, it was worse than that. Well, when I headed for the tall timber, 1 did not get a gun—maybe I did not have the price and maybe I wished to buy one on the spot and save the trouble of carrying it. Anyway, I had not been there long until I bought this gun—later I discovered Noah’s initials carved on the inside of the barrel. “At last a day arrived that seemed to look good for deer, and I set forth. I had the gun—my precious gun, a small lunch and was wearing a heavy buckskin coat, and so 1 was happy, imagining myself a true deer hunter. For some time I wandered, stealing softly thru dense thickets LA PORT Ii HIGH SCHOOL REVIEW. 36 and heavy undergrowth—I had gone for several miles thru heavy tamarack swamps and little knolls of pines—thru the heart of the country said to be the best for hunting, and was growing very tired and disappointed. Suddenly on my left I heard a faint rustle. Not knowing what it was 1 paused instantly behind a tree and tried to locate the origin of the noise. For a while there was dead silence. There it was again. Now I had it located, and so 1 began a series of wriggles and twists that brought me a few feet nearer the origin. By this time I was confident that I would see two bucks with horns locked, fighting a relentless struggle or at least a doc straining to reach the tender shoots on some sapling. Again the noise, and this time it was right over me. Slowly I leaned to one side until at last I could see,—” here Hulverson paused long enough to grin—“I could see the cutest little woodpecker pecking away for worms, that 1 ever saw in my lifc.'' “Ihilly gee,” sighed Frankinburgerstein, greatly reliev- ed. “I thought de bear was coming.” “Oh. say,” sniffed Bohland, “MacLennan can beat that any day in the week. Why, when he starts telling about sliding down Bunker Hill monument in the winter, and swimming in the tea j� ot in the summer, with pulling up fully clothed and preserved skeletons and their golden hair—” “Let him finish,” murmured Ward, dreamily, so the narrator scratched his head and resumed his story. “I don’t know just how I got away from there, but I did. Perhaps it was an hour later, when suddenly and without the least bit of warning, a great big buck bounded lightly across the open space alxnit fifteen yards away from me. Quick as a flash I raised my gun—that residenter— muzzle loader—relic of the iron age or what ever you call it—” “Did it bust?” this from Enie. “No, child, it did not bust. I wish it had. I pulled the trigger after taking careful aim. There was a report and when the smoke lifted there was the buck, lying quietly on the grass. Dropping the gun. I rushed forward to cut the throat of the deer to make sure of him. Just as 1 knelt LA PORT E HIGH SCHOOL REVIEW. 37 down beside him, I felt a violent shock on the back of my buckskin coat. It threw me over the deer and stunned me, and when I became conscious once more the deer was gone.” “How did that happen; what did it?” innocently asked the Freshman. Why, it is simple enough,” explained Hulverson. When I rushed forward to cut the deer’s throat, I beat the shot there, and when I knelt down the shot had just arrived. Consequently 1 got the benefit of it. What caused the deer to drop was the wave of wind caused by the approach of the shot—” Then Hulverson grabbed bis hat and ran, and what the others said may not be printed. FOR GIRLS. For Homely Girls—One dose potassium-ferro cyanide, al- terated by a cupful of corosive sublimate every ten minutes until relief is obtained. For Pretty Girls—One box bon bons every evening, several large doses of parties, balls, canoeing trips, etc., sever- al times a week. Constant attention, varied by occa- sional evenings at the opera. For Snippy Girls—The axe. For Nice Girls—Frequent doses of ice cream, caramels, opera and dancing. For Most Girls—A wad of chewing gum and a beau. This number of the Review” is dedicated to the class of ’07. With a few exceptions it is the product of the Senior class alone. Izzv” Frankenstein is given a reserved seat when Miss Hunter is in charge. That kid is more trouble then he’s worth. Luce gets a new suit. A. Link is investigating the matter. Decker still continues to use his skillful tactics in the maneuvering of magazines. 3 LAPORTE HIGH SCHOOL REVIEW. The Review extends its thanks for the exchanges that have coir.e to its desk during the year. They were quite helpful and suggestive in many ways. With this issue we hid you adieu for the year, and hope that we may meet you again next September. The Scottsburg School Echo is given over to the sen-' iors. It contains a number of commendable features. Be- sides containing cuts.of the members of the class, it also gives those of the faculty. It is well arranged and well edited. As to form, we say the same about it that we have to say about a number of papers, we prefer the single col- umn rather than the double, as it makes the paper more pre- sentable and does away with the necessity of rolling when it is to be mailed. One of the most artistic and readable high school pa- pers that came to our desk is the Orange and Black. It is very well edited, as its careful arrangement of parts and the nature of the material indicate. We especially feel like commending its literary department. It also enlists the co-operation of its alumni by keeping track of those who have graduated from school. The Stenator and the Inlander are always good, but re- flect college life rather than high school life. As such thev do not deal with just the same problems that confront us. LAPORTE HIGH SCHOOL REVIEW. 39 and we do take the same interest in them that we do in high school papers. Still we are glad to get them. We were glad to receive the new paper. Manitau Rip- ples, from the Rochester High School. Its stories are in- teresting and its poems have a ring of originality that isn’t always characteristic of the poems found in high school pa- pers. We trust that we will receive Manitau Ripples reg- ularly next year. The Retrospect, of Michigan City, is a very commend- able book. The cuts are good, and the material well ar- ranged. It is a good thing for all schools to keep track of their former athletes, and Michigan City has certainly done that in the Retrospect. It contains cuts of almost all of their athletic stars dating from several years back, up to the present time. In conclusion let us say that we have appreciated every publication that has been sent to us. and gladly sent return exchanges. We admit that our Exchange Column has been brief, and acknowledgments few. hue we sincerely promise to do better next year. It is our first year, and that is our excuse for our blunders. Our earnest prayer is that we may greet you all and meet you all next September, when we re- sume our school duties. THEIR PET EXPRESSION. J. IV. McLennan—“Yah.” A. M. Otwill—“Gee Whizz.” “Jeerusalem.” “Goodness Gracious.” “Gee-manie Cuckoo.” Etc. C M. Luce— ? ?!!?? —-----------?!!! ? Drawer—“Let’s see once.” Miss Kokn—“Oh dear.” Simons—“Oh. my boy.” Bright man—“Take your books and go home. Since last issue of the Review, the Porter school has been opened with Paul Wood janitor and High Mogul in general. 40 LAPORTE HIGH SCHOOL REVIEW. Senior Dictionary, 07. 1. Alexander—A night hawk and unattached man. 2. Adams—A descendant of the first family. 3. Anderson—One of the weaker sex. 4. Bradbury—Slightly weaker. 5. Fail—One who arrives late. 6. Fitzpatrick—The broad smile champion, also a twirler and flirt of some note. 7. Garwood—Unmarried as yet. 10. Uoelocker—A boy with a tricky tongue. 11. I loover—A heathen hobo who never works. 12. Ilulverson—The original Chimmy Chasininski. 13. Link—Found in chains, sausages and golf courses. 14. McLane—An inquisitive motorist. 15. Martin—An interscholastic liar with an elastic con- science and a rubber neck. 16. Parkhouse—An interesting rustic. 17. Peglow—A victim of “baseballia dementia.” 18. Runyan—A dock for smacks. 19. Swanson—A mismanages 21 and 22. Smith Y. and Smith M.—Two participants in athletics, disinclined to exertion such as studying, washing dishes, etc. 22. Schnurr—One with a halo rivaling the very sun. 23. Weaver—A cabbage with a college education. 24. Ziegler—German animal life subsisting on saner kraut, limburger, etc. LAPORTE HIGH SCHOOL REVIEW. 4 The Housekeeper s Diary (By a Friend of the Review.) A young farmer in an adjoining state who entertained an exalted opinion of his ability to “keep house.” kept a diary during the seven weeks’ absence of his wife, who was away on a visit to her folks. The diary is now given to the public for the first time; names of individuals and place be- ing omitted. November 18, 1886. Wife went away last night at the midnight hour, her destiny being Fort Wayne. Ind. It was two o’clock a. m. when I returned from the depot; I drop- ped to sleep and did not wake up till 7:20. I ate my break- fast at nine o’clock. Was engaged the rest of the forenoon straightening up. Beefsteak for breakfast: cold boiled beef for dinner; same for supper. This is fine; 1 shall prove to my neighbors and friends above all to my wife, that I can help myself and that I know a thing or two about housekeeping; I batched before I was married. Nov. 19. Arose at 7 a. m. Hauled in some fodder for the cattle, also several loads of corn. For dinner, hot cof- fee. pie and ginger snaps; also enioyed roast beef for supper. Ella S. kindly baked me three mince pies: ate one for sup- per. Ah! this is fine living, nothing to bother: feed the stock and do the chores and eat what wife baked for me be- fore she went away—pleasant day. Nov. 20. Arose at 7 a. m. Am inclined to think that the clock is fast; have always been accustomed to get up at 5 a. m. Hauled corn and churned four pounds of butter. 1 purchased one pound of raisins to put in mince meat : wife put them in sparingly; think I can improve them. For sup- per I had dried apples and ginger snaps. Am getting along fine; have everything my own way—fair all day. Nov. 21. Woke up it 8:10. There surely is something wrong with the clock. I made my bed this morning, here- after 1 will ‘‘stir it up” once every week. Was to church twice today, morning and evening. For breakfast, I had 42 LAP ORTE HIGH SCHOOL REVIEW. coffee and pic. For dinner, milk and pic. For supper, “wind pudding.” This is my first Sunday alone. Nov. 22. Rained today. Drove hogs to market and gathered seed corn. Received the first letter from wife to- day. Got up at 6:30 a. m. For breakfast, beefsteak and ginger snaps; took dinner at a neighbor’s; for supper beef- steak and ginger snaps. I notice there is somewhat of a sameness about my meals. I prepare that which requires the least labor, as my chores take up much of my time. I notice the supplies my wife left are running low. Nov. 23. Awoke at 6:30 a. m. Rained all night, windy all day. Breakfast, beefsteak and ginger snaps; dinner, mince pie; supper, bread, butter and celery. Wish 1 had more of a variety to eat. This washing dishes is very dis- tasteful to me; quite a lot on hand now that need washing. But I am getting along nicely. Nov. 24. Got up at 7 a. m. Something occurred today which aroused my suspicions; evidently my wife had an un- derstanding with Mrs. M. along certain lines. Mrs. M. re- quested me to leave the key with her when I left home this a. m. She said she wanted to “clean up.” I could not well refuse the request, but I do regard this as a serious reflec- tion upon my ability to keep “clean house,” true, a peculiar odor greeted my nostrils when I went near the safe; but I was ready to attribute it to closed doors and want of venti- lation. 1 granted Mrs. M her request and she proceeded with the “cleaning up process.” She afterwards displayed to me what she discovered in the safe. There was a dish of partly decayed baked beans; another dish of soured toma- toes, still another dish containing an egg which, judging by the odor, was rather ancient. Several other stale articles had contributed to the odor. All combined, it was no pon- der the safe smelled “stout. Verily, the interior of the safe was as corrupt as the grafting ring of the La Porte High school. For dinner I had fried and ate a piece of beefsteak as large as the bottom of the skillet. Toward the middle of the afternoon I felt sort 0’ dyspeptic, which I attributed to the discoveries made in the morning in the safe. Added to that 1 was somewhat affected with the belief that it was somebody’s duty to stay at home and keep the house clean. LAPORTE HIGH SCHOOL REVIEW. 43 I had too much to look after. Mrs. M. prepared me a good supper. Andrew S. spent the evening with me. I am not discouraged: just a little lonesome. Tomorrow’s Thanks- giving day. Nov. 25. Went to hear Rev. D. E. Howe preach the Thanksgiving sermon ; heard a good sermon. Helped to cat Thanksgiving dinner at neighbor M.’s. Had a splendid din- ner composed of turkey, cranberry sauce, pies, cakes, etc. I must confess the dinner did more to make me dissatisfied with my cooking and housekeeping than anything else since I am left alone. It reminded me of the time when wife pre- pared good meals for me. I am not discouraged, but just a little lonesome; would like to see SOMEBODY. I think a wife ought not to leave her husband quite so long alone with so many duties to attend to. No, I will not complain. I will master the situation. Has been cold all day. For sup- per, mince pie. Alone one week and no better. Nov. 26. Received a letter from wife today. For breakfast, 1 had butter, bread and pie. Dinner, ginger snaps; supper, celery and bread; drank cold water, did not have time to make coffee. My supplies are getting low, ginger snaps about all gone. I feel somewhat alarmed at “future prospects.” I gathered corn today. L. P. and E. 1� . spent the even- ing with me. Snowing this evening. Nov. 27. Cold all day. I churned four pounds of but- ter today. For breakfast had coffee cake; dinner, fried sausage; supper, mince pie. I had intended to make my bed this morning, but my courage failed me. Well. 1 think it is bqst to leave it as it is. “It just fits me.” If I “stir it up,” I might experience some trouble in finding the middle of the bed and in becoming “re-instated” again. Nov. 28. I attended S. S. this a. m. Took dinner with mother. My supper consisted of half a mince pie. I begin to “imagine” that staying at home alone is not exactly as pleasant as I had fancied it to be. If 1 could keep house without washing dishes, a very objectionable feature would he overcome. I am pursuing a plan along this line which somebody would be opposed to; it is this: I wash dishes 44 LAPORTE HIGH SCHOOL REVIEW. once every week. After using them I stack, them away nice- ly until all have been used. Then I have a ‘‘general wash up.” It gives me a lot of clean dishes all at once and does away with all the annoyance of frequent dish washing. Nov. 29. Gathered corn today. Also went to town to get the coflee pot repaired: it had sprung a leak: before taking it away 1 gave it a good wash. Perhaps it will im- prove the taste of the coffee. Received a letter from wife today. Ella S. brought me a chocolate cake. I ate a part of it for my dinner; I had no appetite at breakfast time, did not eat anything; for supper I had coffee and bread and honey. Nov. 30. I hauled up corn fodder today, and helped to grind sausage meat at neighbor M.’s this evening. Was a little late getting up this a. m. Ada M. brought me a loaf of bread and some newly made sausage, of which I ate some for my breakfast. For dinner I had ‘‘wind pudding;” this is not very substantial diet but very cheap. One can obtain it most anywhere by going outside and biting at the atmos- phere ; in other words, it means “nothing.” Took supper at neighbor M.’s. Dec. 1. This has been a cold, gloomy, blue day for me. I remained in doors al day; feeding wood to the stove was my occupation aside from the necessary chores in and about the barn. Ella S. kindly brought me four blackberry pies and some boiled back bone. Thus I had plenty to eat for my dinner and supper. The kind acts of neighbors in bringing me something to eat are appreciated. I must confess I have lost all of my inclination to keep house alone. My living is monotonous indeed. Aside from what the neighbors bring in occasionally, my bill of fare consists of the same variety of “truck” each day; I sleep in the same bed. in the same “deep hole in the middle,” each night. The sombre quiet- ness which prevails in and about the house is painful. Two weeks ago tonight since “All alone, all alone, she left me.” What an affliction to deprive a man of his “babies.” I don't care so much for the woman, if I could only have a romp with the “baby boys.” I hope wife is having a good time and enjoying herself the same as I am trying to do. LAPORTE HIGH SCHOOL REVIEW. 45 Dec. 2. Another cold day. My time today was occu- pied “picking beans” beside the warm stove. This morning Mrs. M. called and insisted on “cleaning up ’ making the bed and dressing it with a “clean suit.” I didn’t think it was necessary and expressed myself to that effect. 1 received a very serious look from her. and she proceeded with the “cleaning process.” She evidently be- longs to the same class of women that wife does. That is, they claim to know more about such matters than men folks. I made a startling discovery today. Have been reduced from 205 pounds avoirdupois to 200. If this continues 1 will be obliged to wear several suits of clothes to make myself and the neighbors believe that 1 am “holding my own.” 1 must keep up “good spirits” as well as “good appearance.” Of the latter I am somewhat apprehensive. My garments are badly rent and torn, and I imagine when I meet any of the “gentler sex” in the neighborhood that they look at me sus- piciously. just sufficiently so to make me feel uncomfortable. I fear there is trouble ahead. Coming events cast their shadows before them. (To be continued next fall.) One of Many. The person speaking is a hatless young school girl, wearing a long, fitted winter coat, which is thrown grace- fully aside to show a most summery of lingerie waists. Held high in both hands to protect her chest from winter’s chill is a beautiful large mink muff. She minces along the street with a forward slant of the body, due probably to the French heels of her street pumps. She is busily talking to a girl who somewhat resembles her- self. “My hair? Do you really like it marcelled? Honest, now? Of course, I mean do you like it on me—it would be chic for you. But notice my profile—is it suited to both sides? Sometimes my left profile is simply grand and my 46 LAPORTE HIGH SCHOOL REVIEW. right looks horrible. Well, I ’in thankful it’s decent, for I’ve had a most torturing time with it this morning. I just couldn’t get it up right, don’t you know. I took it down just six times. Yes, we are late anyway, and there’s no use of hurrying, for my hair will look so untidy, or perhaps come down if we hurry. 1 really do think 11. S. hours are perfect- ly outrageous. The very idea of expecting us to be there at 8 . 30. “Oh, say, is that your zoology note book? Can’t I see it just a minute? Gee! your drawings are just peachy, aren’t they? Won’t you let me take this home over night? 1 want to copy some of these that I didn’t do in the class. I can’t imagine what I was doing not to do them. Probab- ly too busy doing something else. “Can’t you hand this in tomorrow just as well as to- day? You know he said we could have until Wednesday. Thank you. Helen, you’re a perfect dear. I’ll ask you and Jack down to spend the evening soon for that. I do want to get thru in zoology, for I need the credits, if 1 am going through next year without much work. “I lave you counted up your credits lately? Oh, but you’re a funny girl. Why, I spend half the time counting up my credits. Last night I settled down to study English, but I got to thinking about the dance next week and what under the sun I could wear to look entrancing, then I tried English again, but I started off again and was counting up my credits—it’s so mixy counting the whole credits and the fractions and all. and the first thing I knew I’d used up all my study time. You have to have just so many to grad- uate. but by careful planning (if you’re wise in the busi- ness) you can save yourself a lot of work. I’ll tell you what I did. I call it real clever. Mr. McMasters—mean old thing, went and told mother that I had to take four studies this half. It seems that lie’s been keeping his eye on me and taking notes on the subject. Of course, mother thought it to he her duty to agree with him, so there I was. As it turns out. I don’t care a hit. for any way I’ll only have to take two studies next year. That’s my Senior year, and I can have all the fun there is going (the way a Senior ought to after slaving three whole years). LAPORTE HIGH SCHOOL REVIEW. 47 ‘‘Well, Me. put the four study idea into mother’s head, and of course I had to get busy and plan, try to get a fourth study that was easy and wouldn’t trouble me any. I had music, zoology and English, and I kept on with them. Oh, yes, 1 know music is not a regular but it looks all the same to mother on my report card, and she doesn’t know hut what I’m taking piano lessons, you see. Well, you bet I didn't chose another science, for science comes five times a week, and how could I get excused or skip the fourth hour Monday p. m.—to go to the matinee, if I had done that? Father suggested history, but mercy me! what do I care about antediluvian kings and queens? Besides, dates al- ways did give me nervous prostration. Of course. I wouldn’t take mathematics. What good is it to a girl, es- pecially when she buys everything on the charge account? “Well, I couldn’t see a thing left but bookkeeping, and mother said she didn’t see the use of that, as 1 didn’t ex- pect to be a business woman. But I explained to her the way if toould discipline my mind, and she gave in, as usual. “No. of course you didn’t know I was taking book- keeping. because I’m not. After I had it all settled. I went to buy the books, and when I found out what they cost, I went straight up. Two dollars!! and me buying my books out of my own allowance. Not for little Maude! “I had to think of something else, so what do you think I did? 1 only passed my first year English by the skin of my teeth, and Miss Palmer advised me to take it over again. Of course. I hadn't intended to. but it dawned upon me that 1 could take it now and call it my fourth study, see? “I had all the books without spending a cent, and I never have to look, at the lesson, but mother was satisfied, and all is serene. Oh, there’s nothing in this whole wide world like planning—like good planning!!” —From the News. (Revised.) Gildersleeve arives at 2:10 p. m. every Tuesday after noon, which is a great hindrance to Miss Kohn. LAPORTE HIGH SCHOOL REVIEW. The days are waxing longer. For June is just in sight ; And each day brings us nearer To the battles we must fight. ()ur four short years are over In the H. S. good and dear; And the question is in order— “What will we do next year?’ '07, the good old numerals. Entwined with the red and black. Arc bound to do their duty, And in genius they’ll never lack. Although we were a hundred In the Freshmen days of yore; We’ve lost in numbers only, During the years that number four. Though we miss some of our comrades. In strength we have not lost. For have we not been victors In spite of all the cost? For the days still give us pleasure, When the inter-class meet came. Wore we not the laurels? Did not genius bring us fame? Let 11s then be up and doing. As we have been in the past: For we have but fairly started. And upon life’s sea we're cast. Senior Reverie —C. E. F., 07. - lows’ Clothing store THE PEOPLE WHO SEEL GOOD CLOTHES Now showing to the young men of LaPorte the swellest line of nobby.up-to-date SPRING SUITS ever brought to town. Ten Styles to Other Stores One n 8 g i ft ft m m Jfirst ffiaptist Church CLARKE RODNEY PARKER, Pastor f[T This Church stands for 11 what is right and good and true. It stands for life wedded to principle. It stands for the righteousness of the community. Of course you are welcome to all Its services. m m m i An Invitation Consider this an invitation if you want to, but we would rather have you visit our drug store without wait- ing for any invitation. “Get the habit” and come here whenever you are in need of drug store goods. Our stock is right up to the mark—includes everything that is expected to be found in a drug store and many things not found in every drug store. Quality prevails in all goods. Prices are as low as the quality of the goods will allow. Do your drug store shopping at our store and absolute satisfaction will be guaranteed to you. Keep in mind that we want your patronage and are doing everything that can be done to make it a pleas- ure to you to do all your drug-store buying here at our store. MEISSNER S PHARMACY THE Jfexqgg STORE r dQL ni G. L. McLANE CO. June Sale tuslin Underwear This Week, At this sale Muslin Underwear will be sold cheaper than ever before. Come and see. G. L. McLANE CO. L=if=ir==ii ir=ii =ip=ii —ii ir=ir=U Rah! Rah! Rah! Good, better, best, Fenker Co’s furniture Beats all the rest. 709-711 Main St. ]Q[ th’s Varsity ’ Style Oxfords and... jflaplr OJitu lUtkrni Headquarters for ‘Pies, Cakes, Pastries of all kinds 1018 Main Street Phone 277 ]3[