Kirksville College of Osteopathic Medicine - Osteoblast Yearbook (Kirksville, MO)

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THE DAILY DISTRESS MACK MEET TIZIE BUNCH HPOPH RECREATION CLUB ll4 S. ELSON gg FOUNTAIN SERVICE lVIalted Milk Specialties CICARS PIPE HEADQUARTERS TOBACCO WHITE C A3151 heigitiliilftlgieinifmg H wedge, but Did you hear about the girl in the Cotton stockings? NO, what happened to her? SANDWICHES Nofhmfl- Dr. Miller: L'Wheii I took this course . I knew all about Bacteria. Fred Summers: Yes, someone else was teaching you. Mother Cexamining her daughters wardrobejz NI see you Went to the I. T. S. dance. Daughter: MNO, Mother, I ripped that shoulder strap playing tennis. judge: L'What are your grounds for divorce? Bride: I'He snoresf' Judge: HOW long have you been mar ried? Bride: Two weeks. G' Prop' judge: Granted, he shouldn't snore Noi an Osleopafliic Drug Store But a Drug Store for Osteopaths OWL DRUG STORE WALCREEN SYSTEM HO. K. Meet Me ai flie Owl PHONE 40 W D. I. 6- BOB ll234l

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THE DAILY DISTRESS ' Oubtiiiers of School Necessities ii ' for the Successful .Student Tl-IE COLLEGE BOOK STORE South Side Square WHAT IS IT TO BE EDUCATED? MILLIONS GAPE AT DR. DONNO-PHEW'S PICTURE AND WoNDERs Has life made a sap of you? Well, what do you think it's made of Dr. Donnofphew? Are you easily upset by charging rhinoceroses and stamf peding elephants? Do safefblowers annoy you, make you irritable? Young man, you are atflicted with assinninitis, which is inflammation of the intellect. Did you know-you had an intellect? Neither did we. But beware, for you are as stupid as a couple of Sewedish oxen plough' ing concrete with a pogo stick. The only polish you have is on the seat of your trousers. You are in the Dark. You're lucky. But don't give up the barge-we've great news for you! Professor Malachi Methuselah Donnofphew is just aching for the chance to give you his complete tenflesson course in Making Eyes at Milkmaids, Making the Milk' maids, Swinging in Hammocks, Dancing the Tuba with a Rhumba and Holding the Bag. Young man- here's the opportunity of'any even' i r Professor Donno-phew in a Typical Bedroonl Altitude! ing! And all in ten easy lessons- nothing to sell, nothing to give, nothing to take. In fact, you're just where you started when you iinish1Dr. Donnofphew sees to that, as you can see by gawking at that hlankest of blank COL1Dt6DH11C6S. And when you graduate, you shall receive from Dr. Donnofphew him' self one of his Special Rolling Scrolls in lavendar with green stripes down the back. And-your name will be scribbled on the box. So remember-Dr. Donnofphew is lying in wait for you. Be wise, and rind your own diploma in the second room to the right. You'll be much better of M. H. Bartlett: Lets sit this one out darling, no one will be the wiser. She: Oh yes, you will. Prof: ujack what is a science U Koenig: Science is a piece of paper what says No Smoking. COOK 8: CARD The Guarantee Store ER Fraternity and College jewelry We Repair Watches, Clocks, Jewelry and Fountain Pens Phone lOl l l I5 South Franklin H2333

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THE DAILY DISTRESS fr ,X K V M rinters For KIRKSVILLE, the COLLEGE and STUDENTS since the Old Doctor started his lfirst class For the teaching ot the Science that revolutionized the Art ot Healing slit We are amply prepared to tal4e care of the printing needs ol: the present generation of osteopathic students as we have those ol: Former years. Certainly . . . We Printed the Qsteoblast JOURNAL PRINTING CO. II9 SOUTH ELSON STREET TELEPHONE FIVE 523513 xfKf-xfxf