Kirksville College of Osteopathic Medicine - Osteoblast Yearbook (Kirksville, MO)

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B I l -........ ,.,., - ,..,... ..-,.,,.,.-,. L T5he Tneurno gastric Nerve Upon an average twice a week, When anguish clouds my brow, My good physician friend I seek To know what ails me now. He taps me on the back and chest And scans my tongue for bile And lays an ear against my breast And listens there awhile Then is he ready to admit That all he can observe Is something wrong inside-to wit, My pneurnogastric nerve! Now, when these Latin names within Dyspeptic hulks like mine Go wrong a fellow should begin To draw what's called the line. It seems, however, that this same, Which in my hulk abounds, Is not, despite its awful name, So fatal as it sounds. 'Yet of all torrnents known to me I'll say without reserve There is no torment like to thee, Thou pneumogastric nerve! ' : 'l 9'LV' Y'2 ' 'Q Roy and Shelton, Plus Sandwiches This subtle, envious nerve appears To be a patient foe- It waited nearly forty years Its chance to lay me lowg Then, like some blithering blast of hell, It struck this guileless bard, And in that evil hour I fell Prodigious far and hard. Alas, what things I dearly love- Pies, puddings and preserves- Are sure to rouse the vengeance of All pneumogastric nerves' Pu gt' 225

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I N Anxious Mother: Are you sure that the baby is not marked? Dr. Turman Qwonf dering about his feejz Whyfer, yes, it is marked C. 0. D. Dr. Turman, im' pressing upon the juniors the imporf tance of regular feed' ing, said: Let nothf ing interfere with the eating of the child at mealtimef' Embryology paper -The ovaries are the pacihc organs of the female. Turman and Nelson join the janitor Service Aerial Division Dr. S. S.: How could the greater trochanter be higher than the head of the femur without a dis' location or fracture of the neck? Freshman: 'LStand the patient on his head. Dr. Waggoner: Any excuses for be' ing here today? Dr. Browne: Wil-- liams, what was the last thing I said yes' terday? Williams: Get out o' herefl Rev. Condit: Folks used to marry and settle down. Now they marry and neither settle down nor settle upf, Dr. Platt R A N six steps-to catch a car. Dr. Waggoner said little bittie once. Martin came to class once without Kohler. Dale Pearson made a round trip in the Allen with only zolfz stops enroute. .Q Doctor Browne: Have you taken . 5 every precaution to prevent the spread of Cookie . . . H Butler and Sloop the contagion in the family? Father: Absolutely, I've bought a sanitary cup, and we all drink out of it. Page 221

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Oh, that I could remodel man! I'd end these cruel pains By hitting on a different plan From that which now obtains. The stomach, greatly amplijied, Anon should occupy The all of that domain inside Where heart and lungs now lie But first of all I should dispose That diabolic curve And author of my thousand woes, The pneumogastric nerve! -Eugene Field. The force stopped here to have ice cream and coffee