Keokuk High School - Comment Yearbook (Keokuk, IA)

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20 THE COMMENT Ruby Pence has entered the literary world. The first book she pub- lished was Don't Wear Your Ponies Out This Season. Robert Parcells owns a publishing company in Keokuk. It ranks sec- ond in its productionsnow and on the fly leaf of the pamphlet is some of Bob's literature- Pay your subscriptions early. The manager has a date and needs a hair cut. Ruby Richard is never lonesome. She is the century's greatest piano player. Ruby's secretary, Fern Merideth, says she has engagements booked up until January 1, 1950. Herbert Stafford is traveling in Isham Jones' Orchestra as a violinist and insists upon playing Grace is the Only Virtue for Me. It's almost pathetic. Martha Wilcox's love for horses has been realized. She won the derby race in Kentucky. Her rival was a King's horse, but Martha carried away the honors like a Queen. Helen Swan is advocating that a golf course be built on the historical battlefilield at Yorktown. But really, from the looks of the game, I think Bunker Hill would be more appropriate, don't you? Mable Fowler discovered she had an artistic touch and is designing in Greek architecture a stadium for K. H. S.. , Oh, yes, John Reither is in San Francisco and is willing to bet anyone that the Volstead Act is a troupe of acrobats. Gladys Thomas has become a grand opera star and wants Doc Coue to improve her disposition. I canlt imagine what he prescribed. I heard it was blue litmus paper, though. Martha Cofran puts out a Blue Book and says that the world will soon be Hooded with Egyptian styles, resulting from the discovery of King Tutls tomb. All we have to do now is look like we've been dead 2000? years. And as for Frederic Hilpert, you know I never fully understood the lines of the poem, Seven years in sun and showers, until I saw his over- coat. Madeline Wolf and Mayme Johnson have started a kindergarten in Australia. Madeline teaches the boys and Mayme the girls. Leland Finlay is a first-class lawyer, and to hear him one can readily see why arguments are called briefs. -Clarice LaPorte, the girl whom I remember as being of a very quiet nature, has gone to the other extreme and craves excitement. Because of her interest she has become sporting editor for the Chicago Tribune. Raymond Cook is a poet, resting on his laurels-may soon die of in- somnia. Ruth Thomas and Clematis Strohmaier have both taken up Near East Relief Work. It proves an old truth that if you fuss with a Greece spot it is liable to spread..

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THE COMMENT 19 Gertrude Lorenz has chosen a vocal career. Her latest hit is The Elephant Swallowed the Coffee Pot and Canlt Find the Grounds. I saw a cartoon headed, World Famous Debatersf' and, as I live, there was Norris Ryder and Elizabeth Morrow gesticulating madly. They were debating on Face Powder Has Done More for Civilization than Gun Powder. Did Cecil Fuller become a poet? Oh, no! He is on trial in Montrose because he tried to murder the calendar by becoming a time killer. lWe nipped off a branch of laurel bush in recognition of Alice OlCon- nor's recent achievements on the links. She is looming strong against the horizon of fame. Helen Whitmarsh is in London trying to introduce there the American habit of chewing gum. It seems hard to understand how the London stenographer gets through a working day. I saw that Marie Sigmund was looking for a new kind of car. Thatls an idea. Tutankanamen's chariot, Dr. Reid, would be the very thing. It certainly would be different. I heard it was in excellent condition and only 3200 years old. She couldn't find another car with en- durance like that. Harry Mardis decided that as the price of haircuts kept on raising he would be a musician. Joe Weber? Why, you should see Joe. He has gradually worked up from the position he had while in High School and is now a Congressman, 100 per cent for the people, and wears no man's collar. Wilma Loewenstein has asked for a divorce because her husband's ex- cessive conceit made living with him impossible. But really, Dr. Ried, I don't think it's the first vanity case that has caused a man's downfall, do you? Mary Maxine Jones has started a newspaper in some eastern city and prints bedtime stories for night watchmen. Leona Mearion bought a Ford sedan and toured the world. She has decided that Uhitching one's wagon to a star is nothing compared to Uhitching one's flivver to an ocean linerfl Lowell Hanes went to Cuba and just before he got off the steamer in New Orleans on his way back the ship's band played Snuggle Up a Little Closer. Elizabeth Aldrich has taken up designing and is known as the draped Russian Artist. Is Roy Krueger her boss? Oh, no! He is a college professor at De Pauw. He says he works in ivory. Korine Bevering was a trained nurse, but fell in love with a patient, so now she's keeping house. Did you know Frank Lake has patented a new kind of fountain pen? He has christened it True Love, because it never did run smooth. Leslie Wolf proposed to a girl while he was on a ranch in Texas and is terribly embarrassed-financially embarrassed.

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THE COMMENT 21 Reinhold Strohmaier became a blacksmith. He shoos flies and also keeps a dairy. Hazel Haggerty is a librarian and simply adores her Work. I found that Amy Merrill is married and says the difference between a husband and a lover is, one pays the bills and the other pays the compli- ments. ' Also that John Fuller has found life to be one bore. He digs oil wells. Lucille Bradley is a' leading manicurist of Chicago. Blondes always do lead. Louise Linquist has become an educator and asks that laundry should be taught in schools. Yes, that's a point that bas been brought up against it. I doubt if the industry could stand the strain, myself. But time will tell. Oliver Kirchner and Bernard Reed? I know you cannot help but know of Oliver. He became a great Rotarian-says it's the Rotary Clubs that make the world go round. Bernard Reed has become a prize fighter. He just turned down an offer or three-quarters of a million to fight in Buenos Aires, Evidently he isn't interested in fractions. Vivian Kraushaar has become a business woman. She is selling Fords by the bunch, like bananas. L Charles Abell has become a comedian, to the surprise of all He says he has walked so far his socks are worn down to spats. Then there was Earlvin Dunson. After his experience in writing wills he became a lawyer, was married several years ago, and goes under a dif- ferent will now. About my host? Don't think I'll keep you in suspense any longer. I really thought you would be able to guess. It's none other than Mr. Davis. EVELYN ECKLAND.