Kentucky Military Institute - Saber Yearbook (Lyndon, KY)

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LAST WILL AND TESTAMENT We, the Class of '47, do hereby leave happily the following things in the following manner: ARNOLD departs with muscles and bar bells. ARTHUR leaves his patience to the Wire BAKER leaves Lawson to the boys in the kitchen. BAUTE leaves Nichols to whoever will have him. BENSON departs for the Wild West to become a bad man. CAMERON leaves his wisdom teeth to Doc Rowell. CORNELISON leaves the pool hall still in debt. DONOHUE Wills Howard to the F. B. I. ENGBERG leaves followed by F. M. A.'s coach. GATCHEL and FLEMING leave follcwed by Mother Hayman. GORDON wills Hewes to the Class of '48. HAAS, G. leaves, nuff said. HAGGARD leaves his boots 'n saddle to Scott, J. HEFFERON leaves English IV like a bat. HOOK leaves following in the footsteps of Barrett. HOOLEY leaves Terry to Zep. HOWARD comes back, the F. B. I. wouldn't take him. .TENKS leaves in a cloud of talcum powder. JENNINGS, C. L. leaves a big gap in the choir. JENNINGS, G. N. leaves with his yo-yo. HOT LIPS KIDWELL leaves to join Harry James. KING, G. wills Marie to the Class of '48. KLEMPNER leaves looking for Forever Amber. KORSTANJE leaves to become high :nan on a totem pole. KRICKER leaves Physics joyfully. LAZZELL departs to sell the Statue of Liberty to the Russians. MAXWELL bequeaths his gopher title to Schmidt. MIGUEL departs sobbing wildly. MILES leaves his ugliness to Schulz. NEWKIRK leaves his queen, doll face. NUTTING bequeaths Bubs to Childes. PE'I'I'IT leaves giving up at last. PORTER wills his hot sax to Ritenour. PRESTON leaves looking for a sun tan. RACE leaves Joan to the dancing class. OLD MAN RAINE just keep on walking along. RAY, W. leaves Pomperoy to Heazlitt. RHODES departs still whispering commands. RICHARD, E. grabs his diploma and flies away. SMITH leaves, Parade Rest. SOLTER leaves nothing but tracks. STEWART wills his merits to Doumas. STOREY wills his mellow-rooney to that solid alligator, Heazlitt. TRAUTMAN and RHODE leave for Madison Square Garden. TYSON leaves calisthenics to Parker. VAN METRE leaves Physics with homework still due. VINTON leaves still trying to beat Trautman. WAGNER leaves the Armory to Sankbiel. WALZ leaves Frazier to Whom it may concern. WILDER departs to open his own model agency. PAPA Shannon leaves, at last t?l -Ray Baute I 4 i l l

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K.M.1. Sm riptg SABER VOL, XCII ' SUNDAY, JUNE 1, 1957 g g g gg g K M I GRADS OF '47 STAGE HUGE BANOUET o 0 o 5 Jesse Richards is still trying tu ,El Q 1 graduate. Perk Engberg is one ol' ,,,, .Z Q17 , , the most famous member's of the I 35 ' iw' YW ' class, as he just won the National . Q H, M .N . X0 1 Golf Open. Richard Arthur re- gal - emi ' -' pllj J turned from Forest Lawn with the 5 I K . Sgr- National Ladies' Singles Cham- , 5 gr 5 ' pionship. David Gordon is just able . if 'ji , to attend as he just returned from 'Q debtors prison b e c a u s e of the N 'lf 'Q Army-Notre Dame g a m e. Steve Y! 5 Miles, the editor, and Ralph Tag- , gart returned from Africa, s t i ll I looking for the lost Kentucadet. ' N, Bill Ray and Bill Race furnished ,MN ' the meat for their friends tpork was servedj. Pinky Robinson - s ' s ' i ' the c h a u f f e u r and trainer of THE KAYDET-JUNE 1, 1957 Last night the Class of 1947 of the Kentucky Military Institute held a banquet for its members. Many of them are notorious men. Those who attended were: The Honorable Dick Vinton, Judge of Greenwood, and the local Grand Dragon of the Ku Klux Klan, Sam Raine the national press agent for the Klan was with him. Muary Lynch and Irving Klempner the proprietors of the Owl Club, Louis- ville, Ky., attended with their chief competitor Dirty Joe Cambron of the Kasba Klub. Cadet Major Bill Shannon attended after just fin- ishing his 11th P.G. The notable radio announcer of the Coon Valley Barn Dance, Hal Eddy, was there. He brought with him his band which consists of all K. M. I. grads. They were: Joe Williams, coozie phone, Jarvis Miguel, blow finger, Chuck Nutting, spring d r u m , Trauto Trautman, wiggle finger, and Jerry Storey, broomjo. A new piece made by Ruf Lazzel, the notable y o u n g composer of two sharps unfinished, was sung by Georgie Haas, the new crooning sensation, and Chas. Jennings, the big boomerang manufacturer. The piece was June O.D. During the banquet several notes were read from those members who were un- able to attend. One of these was from Monk II Rhode, who is deep in the heart of the African jungle looking for anteaters and another note was from Bernard Baute, who had just broken his leg after suc- cessfully defending his title of la- dies lightweight boxing champion- ship against . . . Preston. Also a note was read from Ed. Richard. who is still taking entrance exams to M. I. T. Indian lover Smith was there with his tribe and Moe Pettit the tribal medicine doctor. Leroy Wagner, the water boy for the Chicago Bears, and Gene King, their backfield star, along with lit- tle Dave King, his undertaker, were there. A few of the faculty at K. M. I. were in this class, they are: Norman Sleepy Crutcher, the new president KK. M. I. has been in the Richmond family for 50 yearsl John Hook, the new P.M. S.8LT., along with his assistant, Ted Jenks. Also ran was Bob Benson. the new Plane G. teacher, and John Wire Rhodes, band instructor. and chemistry teacher. Arnold joined us after winning the Na- tional w e i g h t lifting champion- ship. Also a few of the boys are olympic champs, th es e are: Gunder G o p h e r Maxwell t h e holder of the new mile record and swimming champ Bill Corn, the holder of the 10 yard free style. Philip Cordes the international vol- leyball champion was with them. Donald Donohue, th e young Chi- cago racketeer, came with his boys to sell his classmates protection.' Warren Walz, the owner of the world's largest Massage Hall, came down to work on Jim Runyan's sore arm fthe flag did a good jobj. Harry Howard came with the fruits of 10 years labor, 10,000 gal- lons of ole mountain dew. Van Metre came along to help drink it. y D. D. Stewart. The Golden G lo v e s candidate, c a m e with his employer. C a r s o n L y 0 n s the magistrate of Corbin, K y., came with the head man of his vice squad, Harold Hubbard. Little Jack Hooley came in late after fi- nally breaking away from matri- monial entanglements. J. C. Free- man came, followed by thousands of worshippers. The sultans, Jas. Fleming and Jack Portor, arrived with their harems. Big John Tyson stopped in, gasping for breath, as he just outran Lena in the Sadie Hawkins day race. John Turner, who is now the new owner of the Sal Hepatica Cocktail Company was among the financial tycoons Bathless Erickson arrived with his brother Lifebouy. Jim Newkirk is still playing second fiddle in the Richmond Band. Wilbur Holeman arrived with his shoes glistening and his suit buttons shining. Bob Lerch arrived and introduced his new automatic work horse tie. a Latin Ponyj. Corny Cornelison is now the United States champion broomstick sitter. Howard Wilder is the captain of our first profes- sional touch-football team and Bing Hall his running mate. General Gil Jennings of the Salvation Army was also at the banquet. Jim Hes- seron came but was so quiet nobody knows what he is. Ed. Solter came still trying to get back into his old ways after rooming with Wil- bur for three years. Bob Sparks is the owner of the world's largest ignition company. Bill Haggard is the author of the year's best seller, The Rat Rules and You. 21 T .i

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NAME Arthur Baker Baute Cordes Corn Donohue Engberg Freeman Gilmore Gordon Hefferon Hall Hook Hooley Howard, H. Hubbard Jenks Jennings, C. L. King, D. Lerch Lyons Maxwell Pettit Preston Porter Race Richard, E. Richards, J. Rhode Smith, L. Stewart, D. Taggard Trautman Tyson Vinton Williams REPORT SHEET it O.C. O.D.- S.G.-'S C.G.- RG.- No underwear at Concealing barre Failure to use C Hot Wire Weber Sleez Lazzell Kegsv Miguel Rouser Rhode 8 ball Raine REPORT reville. 1 under uniform. amay. Dribbling all over basketball court. Sneaking swim in bathtub. Evading stick sheet by rooming with Cadet Maj. Gross continual, loud boisterous talking. Unsociable in sociology class. Using foreign language in public speaking. Failure to open the hatch. Dying eyebrows. Continually wearing water goggles. Carrying seven volumes to the beach. Wearing turtle-neck sweater to class. Concealing brew, dice, fire crackers and cards in closet. Impersonating another Cadet. Continually walking on knees. Wearing girdle w ith shorts. Disturbance in window. Climbing out of barracks by use of yo-yo. Failure to dig me Hiding in gopher Stealing another Bed not made in llow-rooney. hole during O.B. Cadet's property. pool hall. Using sax to blow bubbles. Flying to low over San Marco. Failure to open the door. Allowing pigs to run through campus. Continual gross confusion. Failure to teach Company Parade Rest. Fighting back. Wrecking Hosemobile. Square alligator. Locking icebox. Impersonating kitchen help. Wearing black socks with civies in Sarasota. REPORTED BY Uncle Bart Jennings, C. L. Eddy Wire Vogel Raine Erickson Wagner, L. Monk Salty Sauk Bugle Ears Rosey Cheek Mrs. Monk .Bugs Donohue Sharky Preston Havens Jones, E. The Sarasota Girls Stutzy Dirty Shan Bunny Smith, L. ..P0p,, The Owl Benson Solter Sankbiel The Battalion Stringl' Stewart, W. . Ants Vinton Cambron Wade The Owl. L. J.