University of Kansas - Jayhawker Yearbook (Lawrence, KS)

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THE JAYHAWKER Sally Independent - And The Hi Photos h Htmk Brown With big plans for the coming year Sally Inde- pendent arrived at her rooming house away down at the bottom of the Hill. Unknown and unknowing, she had come to place her feather in the crown of the Jayhawk. A Microphone for Four at the New Student Dance V. And a Table for Four Nearby After a. brief argument with her landlady over whether she should or shouldn ' t nail her Notre Dame banner to the wall, Sally sallied up Fourteenth street, being still full of freshman vitality, and de- cided to have dinner at the Union. There she found that there were other people attending the University there was a line! (One registration, one enroll- ment, one physical, and one trip to the Union book- store later, she realized that it really hadn ' t been a line at all just a few people.) She discovered that her appetite was considerably more healthy than it had been back in her home town and she gulped her food down ravenously that is, when she wasn ' t staring at the MEN and just gulping. Noticing that the MEN were unbelievably friendly, Sally decided to go to the mixer dance at the Union for she understood that there she could meet them. A few hours later she kissed six MEN good night on the front porch and crawled up the stairway to her room. When she and her newly arrived roommate, Saddie, had patched up her feet to the point that they could still be used for arithmetic problems, the two girls settled down to trying on each other ' s clothes. The next day began at noon, when Sally fell out of bed and rubbed liniment on all her aching muscles. Then she and Saddie struggled up the Hill to the Union for lunch. Registration and enrollment were next on Sally ' s list. Delayed for half an hour by a con- flict with the cop over the direction traffic ought to go, she found herself in the line, busily writing her name. An hour later she finished writing her name and started paying bills. This didn ' t take as long. The man said How much have you got, we want it! and that part of it was over. Out in the free air again she shuffled through her cards a membership in I.S.A., Y.W.C.A., I.W.S., A.W.S., and R.O.T.C, plus a subscription to the Jayhawker, the Bitterbird, and Children ' s Play- mate. Sally would add her brawn and brains and clever wit to K.U. activities. Enrollment was simple. She was pushed into a room, waved to go that way, pulled this way, a transcript shoved into her hand and a Registrar ' s

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FALL NUMBER, 1948 23 replied, shyly hiding my head in my hip pocket. Hawr, Hawr, Hawr, he chuckled, helping me to reset my vertebra, Well, my boy, my name is Howard Howjado, Rush Chairman for Tappa Kegga, and I ' m glad to see you here, furthermore our Presi- dent is glad to see you here, and our housemother, and our mascot, and our cook, and our mortgage, and ... At this point he paused and fumbled hastily for his script. Unable to find it, he carried on valiantly in spite of his handicap. Tell me son, Howard continued, Does your Dad own a brewery? No, I sobbed. Do you own a converti- ble? No. Have eight sisters in a sorority? No. All-State athlete? No. Are you a legacy? he gasped. No, I sobbed. My boy, he roared. I can see you ' re just our type. By the way. what ' s your name? Terence Turgid, I blurted out. Ohmy- gawd! he screamed. No, Turgid! I re- plied as he fainted away. The autumn sun was descending rapid- ly in the general direc- tion of West Hills, as I slowly wended my way toward the last outposts of fraternity row. As I plodded along the pavement I caught sight of a stately stone edifice bordering the street. Its ivy-clad spires caused the structure to look very much like a church. However, I had been fooled before, obviously this was a fraternity house. Glancing about, I walked quickly up to the door and boldly entered. I padded softly through the hallway and entered a large auditorium. It seemed that I had entered during the process of a rush meeting. The Rush Captain was standing up on a platform, loudly haranging a large group of actives and rushees seated before him. I was surprised to note that there were some women in the group, however, I quickly passed these off as members of the mothers club. I sat down on one of the benches in the rear of the room and began to listen to the Rush talk. Friends, the speaker began, Our opponents are using every unscrupulous method to gain adherents! I hissed lustily and stamped my feet. They are using every dirty trick in the book! he continued. Damn dirty rushers! I thought emphatical- ly. I have even heard, he screamed, that they are promis- ing free beer to new recruits!! I booed loudly. It must be the T.N.E. ' s, I thought. The time has come for us all to join to- gether! ! he contin- ued hysterically. At last I shall be a join- er, I sighed. Now is the time, this is the hour, he said, his voice rapidly ap- proaching a crescendo . WHO WILL TAKE THE PLEDGE? Me . . . I . . .My- self, Terence Turgid, I cried out, leaping to my feet and charging at the platform. I ' ll join, I ' ll pledge! From this day forward I shall enlist myself in your organization! The speaker smiled as I bore down on him. He quickly hustled me aside with some of the officers of the fraternity. I was quickly forced to sign papers, and then I was handed a card. Where ' s my pledge pin, I sobbed with an air of disappointment. One of the mothers thrust a white ribbon in my hand. Hail Xenophon, Socrates, and Sappho, I sang as I walked out of the stone portals of my new home. (Continued on Page 83)

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Entertainment at the New Student Dance receipt grabbed away from her. Then there was a great deal of pointing toward a large board with things written on it and a repeated no, no, No, NO! until at last she was pushed back into the world with a card in her hand informing her she was enrolled in History of the Development of the Earth Worm I, Deep Sea Diving, Lower Slobbovian, Comma Uses I, and Western Civilazation. Oh that she had had someone to warn her against Western Civilization! She was not quite so energetic as she labored up Fourteenth street that night to attend another mixer at the Union. But the sight of so many MEN revived her to the point that she was able to take a tour of the campus before closing hours. Her escort was very courteous and eagerly pointed out such land- marks as Potter ' s Lake and the statuary about the campus. The next morning came the Physical! Sally clutched the sheet and of course the doctors won. Finding that she had nothing worse than a healthy condition, which they felt a few weeks of college life would cure, they decided to let her stay but not until they had jabbed her with needles, counted her ears, and measured the difference in length of her hair before and after curling. When Sally heard that the I.S.A. was sponsoring some apple-polishing parties she powdered her shoes and shined her nose, for by this time our Sally was not quite as innocent as she had been. She thought a little pull with the right people might be of help someday. So she trudged the long weary way to West Hills, she played games, she laughed at jokes, and she flirted with the teacher and was having a thoroughly enjoyable time until she found out that he taught History of the Development of the Snake which she could never take because of her course in the earth worm. But she still returned home happy in the knowledge that she had met the FACULTY. Sometime during the week-end she viewed the wicked college students at the Tepee, the Sky-line, the Mite, the Pit, the Hawk. She found out that college was not to be all classes and study. And she knew that she was simply going to love K.U.! But when Sally got up Monday morning to go to an eight o ' clock, her idea of college had changed somewhat. The FACULTY were just teachers, MEN were just men, and Fourteenth street had be- come that - !ffl $!! Fourteenth street. Up on North Hill on Monday night Sally sat with hundreds of other new students and swatted mosquitoes while she listened to the history of K.U. and of the traditions and how they came to be. She stumbled with the others down to the stadium and watched the fire ' s path down the Hill. Then as she croaked out the Rock Chalk, Sally knew her orienta- tion was over. She had become a JAYHAWK! Two New Students Step Out