University of Kansas - Jayhawker Yearbook (Lawrence, KS)

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22 THE JAYHAWKER The Id es of the King PARTE, THE FIRSTE Forsooth, gadzooks, and a barrel of 3.2 on a dead man ' s breast! cried Sir Arthur as he leaped into the saddle of his snorting war horse, Homer. Homer grunted. Why art thou leaving like a bat out of Western Kansas? queried Arthur ' s aged mother. I must! shouted Arty as he sped down the highway, fully keeping in his own lane, I am off for yon wildes of Oread Mounte where lies my quest—the Grail of Ale, and my Lady Hortense who has been kidnapped by a wild mountain band of Greeks. Tis for these myriad reasons, fond mother, that I ride forth unto yon forest, dense. Dense, screamed his mother, I ' d luff to! Whereupon Arthur struck his mother a stunning blow and rode off at full tilt. Homer disliked being ridden at tilt, and demanded another nickle. 4 e-Itinci-lite-dzeote.1 4cauta4 el Me Ptah Itleeh 14dt .4 PARTE, THE SECONDE For two days and two nights did Sir Arthur follow the highway which led to the city, Lawrence on the Kaw, home of sorcerers, wizards, and a place of strange doings. Coming in at eventide, he rode to a nearby Inn, a large place, owned by a Frenchman, and called, Jahnees . Ho, Innkeeper, exclaimed Arthur, a room for a traveller! Nay, sire, plied the Innkeeper, all my rooms are taken. Hast not thou heard? The town has been taken over by nomadic tribes of barbarian Greeks, bearing strange names like Sigma Nu, Phi Psi, and Beta. Tis not safe to walk the cobbled streets at night. Dullard! screamed Arthur, and striking the man a stunning blow, he goaded Homer out into the gathering fog. Homer bounded into the street on little cat feet, sat for a while on silent haunches and then they moved off together. Arthur had but ridden a few paces when from a dark doorway, eight masked figures loomed forth in front of him. Applying the emergency brake. Homer screeched to a halt. No sooner had Arthur stopped than a figure leaped out at him. One man quickly took his blood pressure, another felt his pulse, a third examined his family tree, while a fourth quickly gave him an I. Q. test. What is thy name , cried one of the men, drawing forth a scroll marked, THE D.U ' s DISCUSS WORLD EVENTS WITH RUSHEE.