Junction City High School - Junco Ed Yearbook (Junction City, OR)

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THE JUNCO-ED 1927 HOW THE FIRST MAN BECAME BALD In the far off time of the very beginning there lived at the edge of the desert a Wild man whose locks grew long and Woolly like all wild men's locks must do. This wild man, like all wild men, had a hobby and it was a hat which reflected the sun's rays with more than oriental splendor. This w-ild man, like wild men are mostly, was lazy and had a horse to carry him so he Wold not have to make sandals to walk on. According to the wild man, this horse had no more -sense than is generally accredited to peanuts. . One day in the far off time of the very beginning the wild man put on his hat which reflected the sun's rays with more than oriental splendor, but his locks had grown so long and woolly that his hat would not stay on his head. So the wild man, being very lazy, cut his hair closely to his head -so closely that it was really shaved, because he did not like to pick up his hat, which reflected the sun's rays with more than oriental splendor. The wild man, according to the custom of all wild men, ate meat. To get his meat he hunted on the desert. Being very lazy he ate only when he had -to, s-o at last he ran out of meat and was forced to go hunting on the d.esert. The wild man put on his hat that reflected the sun's rays with more than oriental splendor, and mounted his horse that had no more sense than is genertlly accredited to peanuts, and went out on the desert. They journeyed far into the desert, when the horse with no more sense than is generally accredited to peanuts, decided to show his wisdom and, like all horses do, bucked the Wild man off w-ho was too lazy to put a saddle on so he could pull leather and thus stay on. The wild man landed on his hat that reflected the sun's rays with more than oriental splendor and s-poiled it exceedingly s-o he could no longer wear it. So great was t-he Wild man's anger against the horse with no more sense than is generally accredited to peanuts that he forgot his laziness and his hat that reflected the sun's rays with more than oriental splendor, and chased. the horse for many days under the hot sun of the desert, un- til the wild man's head was burnt to the hardness of a cooking class bis- cuit. At last the wild man went home and soaked his head in the oil of olives of which there were a great many at the edge of the desert, as there are at the edge of every desert. Under his care and soaking the wild man, who was civilized now that his hair was cut, softened the great hardness of his head, just as a cooking class biscuit will soften under such process. Everything was then all right with the wild man except that the hair on is 'head had so long .tried to push through the hardness of his head that it had died and the wild man was bald for life. Ever since that day many men have been bald. , MAC HOYT '28 41

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THE ,IUNCO-ED 1927 g the map of the British Isles. A long time ago before people were called names there lived a great explorer. This explorer was constantly in search of the fountain of youth. All his efforts were toward trying to be young again. This explorer spent most of his life trying to find the fountain. Well, as it happened, one day he found his fountain. He bathed in it and immediately grew- young. Then he went back to his home town. His neighbors were very surprised to see him -so young again. They begged him to tell his secret, but he would not do it. Whenever this man got old he would go to the fountain and get young. Finally the people around this town became civilized. They fbegan to call each other by names. The mayor was given the job of naming all the in- habitants of the town. When he came to this explorer he pondered a, long time, and then he decided to call him Young because he always stayed young. And that is why Bruce's last name is Young. Probably he still knows where that fountain of youth is for he sure keeps that schoolgirl complexion, doesn't he girls? And its a cinch he doesn't use Palmolive soap. You can tell that by his face. He doesn't use any soap at all. In the -city of Oolapoola on the Yaleepalee river in Chasawasee there once lived a we-nan who had a grown son. This woman's name was Nell and she was a widow. Her husband had died of logoes on the bogoes in the great epidemic of 1664 B. C. Now this son of hers got to be a strap- ping big fellow and because of his size and prodigious strength he was distinguished from the other citizens of that town. When the people would see him go down town they would say, there goes Nell's son. This used to be a very popular saying. It -has thus remained down thru the ages and the great, great, great, great, great, great, grand-aughter of Nel1's son, Violet Nelson, says that this is the way her name originated. SAM MITCHELL, Senior -LO ON A DARK, DARK NIGHT Did you ever ride on a dark, dark night, With just the stars and the way, When the eirie sight of a distant sprite Makes your hair turn almost gray? When every dark hulk beside the white road Sends creeps running down your spine, And every dark tree with its dark leaf load Seems a group of spectres nine? Oh it's great to see home in the distance, With its bright lights twinkling fair, And your mother's loved face at the entrance And the host of .the loved things there. IDA MARKUSEN, Senior

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THE JUNCO-ED 1927 A ROMANCE OF POPULAR SONGS Last Night on the Back Porch Red Hot Henry Brownnwhispered to Cecilia, Sweet Child, Let Me Call You Sweetheart, so Don't Wake Me Up- But his words were of no -avail. Poor Papa, Feeling Kinda Blue, as he bid' her good by he sobbed: Hard Hearted Hanna, I'l1 Be Loving You Always. Swinging Down the Land and Stumbling over the Rock of Ages, he fell into the Old Oaken Bucket, and was gone Forever, Relenting, Sorry and Blue, she bewailed Oh, I wish I had some One to Love Me. So Alabama Bound went to Barcelona and Gettin' Acqua.inted with Charley, My Boy, decided to go Paddlin' on the Swanee River Underneath the Mellow Moon. Several weeks later she rebuked him, saying, Ah, ha, You're Cheatin' On Me. I szuw you with Flaming Mamie. Poor chap tried to explain, but she answered: Bye, Bye, Mother, I'm going -hom-e on Horses, to bid Mother to Tie Me to Your Apron Strings Again, and left him saying: I'll Never Miss You Again. Sweet Man went to Colorado and built My Castle in Spain. While there he met the Harmony Kid and ,saw him do the St. Louis Hop and heard him sing the Song of Volga Boatmanf' Sighing and Angry he moaned What Good is Good Morning? 'Dhere's More Good in Good Night. Charley returned to Cecelia and begged Pretty Baby Teach Me to Smile I Wan't to Be Kissed cause with you 'Tm Sitting On Top of The World I Never Knew How Wonderful You Were Bamboolo Who Wouldnft Love You, I Won't Go Home To Night. I Want Ito Be With You In My Tippy, Tippy Canoe, Underneath the Dreamy Carolina Moon. Cecelia answered happily By the Sign of The Rosef' I Knew You'd Come Back To Me Pal O' Mine. See my Lantern of Love I put it there to See You In My Dreams. 'Come Kiss Me Again she finished. While in his arms she said What A Man All the Time Is Loving Time When the One You Love Loves You. And walking down the path of 'iLove In Spain he said Hi Ho, The Merrie As Long As She Loves Me. NOEL DANTN, Junior- SOMETIME When Clyde Morgan is a man He's going to be a tailor, And Mac Hoyt says that he I Would like to be a sailor, Glenn Rafoth is going to be The Junction City baker, But Earl says he wants to be The Ivie auto-maker. Emma and Ellen upon the stage No doubt will win great fame, And Ida will live up to that theme, Of what's in a name. Hazel will tell us all the news From China and Japan, And even the rest of all our class, Will do the best we can. V HOLLY MORGAN- 42