Junction City High School - Junco Ed Yearbook (Junction City, OR)

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THE ,IUNCO-ED 1927 g the map of the British Isles. A long time ago before people were called names there lived a great explorer. This explorer was constantly in search of the fountain of youth. All his efforts were toward trying to be young again. This explorer spent most of his life trying to find the fountain. Well, as it happened, one day he found his fountain. He bathed in it and immediately grew- young. Then he went back to his home town. His neighbors were very surprised to see him -so young again. They begged him to tell his secret, but he would not do it. Whenever this man got old he would go to the fountain and get young. Finally the people around this town became civilized. They fbegan to call each other by names. The mayor was given the job of naming all the in- habitants of the town. When he came to this explorer he pondered a, long time, and then he decided to call him Young because he always stayed young. And that is why Bruce's last name is Young. Probably he still knows where that fountain of youth is for he sure keeps that schoolgirl complexion, doesn't he girls? And its a cinch he doesn't use Palmolive soap. You can tell that by his face. He doesn't use any soap at all. In the -city of Oolapoola on the Yaleepalee river in Chasawasee there once lived a we-nan who had a grown son. This woman's name was Nell and she was a widow. Her husband had died of logoes on the bogoes in the great epidemic of 1664 B. C. Now this son of hers got to be a strap- ping big fellow and because of his size and prodigious strength he was distinguished from the other citizens of that town. When the people would see him go down town they would say, there goes Nell's son. This used to be a very popular saying. It -has thus remained down thru the ages and the great, great, great, great, great, great, grand-aughter of Nel1's son, Violet Nelson, says that this is the way her name originated. SAM MITCHELL, Senior -LO ON A DARK, DARK NIGHT Did you ever ride on a dark, dark night, With just the stars and the way, When the eirie sight of a distant sprite Makes your hair turn almost gray? When every dark hulk beside the white road Sends creeps running down your spine, And every dark tree with its dark leaf load Seems a group of spectres nine? Oh it's great to see home in the distance, With its bright lights twinkling fair, And your mother's loved face at the entrance And the host of .the loved things there. IDA MARKUSEN, Senior

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THE ,IUNCO-ED 1927 HOW YOU GOT YOUR NAME Recently I was asked to write an unusual article for the Maroon and Gold. The editor asked me to give the origin of names of some of the students in our High School. Being a historian of great note it was easy for me to do this. Here is the result: During the Middle Ages in the small town of Dunfreeboro in Ireland. there lived a justice of the peace. Now this justice had an unusual habit of fining speeders and traffic violators large sums of money. Whenever a speeder came in and pleaded guilty and started to lay down his S5 fine Cthis was the usual fine everywhere at this ltimej this justice would say, No, you don't get off that easy, you must pay 'More Fee,' say S25. Now, the traffic violators, as you can imagine, did not like this, so whenever they saw this justice of the peace they would yell, Hello, More Fee. Soon all the inhabitants of the .town began calling him More Fee which later was boiled down to Murphy, and now is the name of two prom- ising justices of the peace, James and Willard Murphy. Stop me if you have heard this one. During the Stone Age there lived in a cave a man who had a keen sense of humor. This man would play jokes on his fellow townspeople. His favorite joke was to make people believe he w-as dead. Then in the midst of their mourning he would appear suddenly. He played this trick so often that the people used to call him Die-er, because he would appear to die so often. This name soon became very popular and that is how Wilda Dyer's remote ancestor got his name. I'Il not keep you up long now, only two more after this one. Along about the time our ancestors used tails instead of ropes to climb trees with and traveled in the air thru trees instead of by airplanes there lived in a tree a very tend.er young man, that is to say, whenever this young man stubbed his toe climbing down out of a tree, or bumped his head against a limb going up, or hurt himself in any way he would let out a loud yell. Now this young man's enunciation was very bad. His yell usual- ly consisted of ten words, I am hoi't, I am hoi'tl Help! I will die! This cry would arouse his neighbors who would come -to him only to find his ailment of a very minor nature. This got to be so tiresome that the pec- ple used to Kid him so as to shame him into not calling' for help. They would say to him, Hello, Hoi't, Are you Hoi't. This remark was finally abbreviated to plain Hello Hoi't. 'Dhen the townsfolk would call him Hoi't. A printer of the 16th century in writing about this man spelled his name H-o-y-t and thus it remained. Ask Mac if this story isn't true. Since he is a direct descendant of Daniel of the famous Lion's Den episode in history it is only natural that Noel Dann is thus named. Ellen Iles got her name from the fact that one of her relations fnot now livingy discovered the British Isles. This discoverer took the Isles part of the name for his own use and left the British part for the Anglo Saxons. Ellen spells her name Iles but that's because she doesn't know better. The correct spelling is Isles. If you don't believe me go look at the spelling on 39

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THE JUNCO-ED 1927 HOW THE FIRST MAN BECAME BALD In the far off time of the very beginning there lived at the edge of the desert a Wild man whose locks grew long and Woolly like all wild men's locks must do. This wild man, like all wild men, had a hobby and it was a hat which reflected the sun's rays with more than oriental splendor. This w-ild man, like wild men are mostly, was lazy and had a horse to carry him so he Wold not have to make sandals to walk on. According to the wild man, this horse had no more -sense than is generally accredited to peanuts. . One day in the far off time of the very beginning the wild man put on his hat which reflected the sun's rays with more than oriental splendor, but his locks had grown so long and woolly that his hat would not stay on his head. So the wild man, being very lazy, cut his hair closely to his head -so closely that it was really shaved, because he did not like to pick up his hat, which reflected the sun's rays with more than oriental splendor. The wild man, according to the custom of all wild men, ate meat. To get his meat he hunted on the desert. Being very lazy he ate only when he had -to, s-o at last he ran out of meat and was forced to go hunting on the d.esert. The wild man put on his hat that reflected the sun's rays with more than oriental splendor, and mounted his horse that had no more sense than is genertlly accredited to peanuts, and went out on the desert. They journeyed far into the desert, when the horse with no more sense than is generally accredited to peanuts, decided to show his wisdom and, like all horses do, bucked the Wild man off w-ho was too lazy to put a saddle on so he could pull leather and thus stay on. The wild man landed on his hat that reflected the sun's rays with more than oriental splendor and s-poiled it exceedingly s-o he could no longer wear it. So great was t-he Wild man's anger against the horse with no more sense than is generally accredited to peanuts that he forgot his laziness and his hat that reflected the sun's rays with more than oriental splendor, and chased. the horse for many days under the hot sun of the desert, un- til the wild man's head was burnt to the hardness of a cooking class bis- cuit. At last the wild man went home and soaked his head in the oil of olives of which there were a great many at the edge of the desert, as there are at the edge of every desert. Under his care and soaking the wild man, who was civilized now that his hair was cut, softened the great hardness of his head, just as a cooking class biscuit will soften under such process. Everything was then all right with the wild man except that the hair on is 'head had so long .tried to push through the hardness of his head that it had died and the wild man was bald for life. Ever since that day many men have been bald. , MAC HOYT '28 41