Jefferson Barracks Citizens Military Camps - Jeffersonian Yearbook (Lemay, MO)

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JEFFERSONIAN Humor Nl. 'lf C. KIICSS Cll'1NlCR.Xl, ORIDJICRS lo take charge of all spuds and gravy in sight. 'llo watch my plate in a military manner, keeping always on the alert for any stray sausages that may come within sight or hearing. 'l'o make all calls for Hsecondsf' 'l'o quit the table only when satisfied that there is nothing left by others, To report to the sergeant any bread that may be cut too thin. To receive all food and refuse to pass it on to others. 'l'o talk to no one who asks for onions. ln case of fire to grab all food in sight. ln cases not covered by instructions to call the mess sergeant. To salute all dishes bearing beefsteak, pork chops, ham and eggs or other meats. 'l'o allow no one to steal anything in the line of grub. To be especially watchful at the time of eating to challenge any one who eats more than l do. VYHAYI' H712 VVOCLD l,1Kl'f TO SFF Chicken in the Nless Hall, every day. .Xbsolute silence at IO:OO P. KI. AX dirty ritie get by at inspection. Orders allowing us to sleep as long as we wanted to. Obituary of the Bugler who gets us up. lce Cream cut as thick as the bread. Pay day every other day. Green members of 4'1 Company hate con- tinually pestered Captain Cummings with demands for their Reveille Buttons. REPORTPID AT RlQYl'ill,l,l.'i Students continue to bother the salesman at the Post Exchange with requests for Reveille Oil. One student was caught disturbing his company oliicers at 5:25 .X. M. one morning. NVhen asked what he wanted he replied that he was ordered to report for the Skirmish Line. The Xledical Staff contribute the following: Kledical Officer examining student- If any- thing is wrong in the following statement l want you to tell me what it is. Statementsrfhe railroad authorities from an examination of statistics have determined that most of the deaths in railway accidents take place in the last coach, therefore railroad officials have decided to remote the last coach from all trains. lVhat is wrong in that statement? Student, tbeamingly after great thoughtl- Well, a train would look kind of funny without the last coach, Sir.'l So it Would. Xledical Oflicer, giving student neuropyschiatri- cal examinationfuXkho was the first President of the United States? .Xnswer by Student' f 'l'ncle Sam, Sir.'l lic! XXO'l'lllCR Cll'iXl Statement by ,Xledical Officer to student l have three brothers, glohn, llenry and myself. Xkihat is wrong with that statement? Student twithout hesitation!-' Well, l think vou should have some periods and commas too. H. ,, Str. Wvhen the company was falling in in alpha- betical order, the old top became somewhat irritated at one private who seemed to be wandering around loose. Hey, there, lkhatls your name? Phillips Hkvell, get the hell up with the his where you belong. 'l'Ol.D lX C COXIPXXY .X student in G Company snapped to at- tention and asked one of the company oliicers: Sir, how much does one of them rifles cost? l want to buy oneii' Officer- The government doesn't sell them. Student-nl am sure they do, Sir, for l,ieut. Quinn said I'd pay for mine if l dropped it again. l.ll'il 1'. .XPPl.lfGR.XXI TXVO DAXYS BEHIND l,ieut. rkpplegram came stalking down the cinder path, clad in cits. .X soldier likewise clad in cits. leaped to his feet and saluted. Kly man. said the liieut.- when in ciyilian clothing you need not salute an officer. Soldier- l beg your pardon. Sir, but have the regulations been changed in the last two days? ILXRD l3Oll,l'1I5 .X hard boiled old Non-Com of the oth Infantry was assisting at the morning calisthenics of a C. KI. T. C. company. Suddenly he approached one of the students and demanded- How old are vou? Eighteen, Sir, said the student. I iXwg'vvan said the N. C. O., you'd have to be more than eighteen to get all the dirt you have on that underwearfl Ofiicer Q'l'o student who salutes with the left handj- See here my boy, why don't you salute with your right hand? Student- l have a sore right arm, Sir. t.Xt the same time saluting with the right handt. Student to Commanding Otlicer. Co. l lDropping Recruit Bag full of clothing on Otlicer's desk. and shoying both hands into his pocketslfef Say. fellow, what in hell's the chances of getting some clothes. INOOOR SPORTS Hunting in barracks bags. 'llrying to lind a piece of meat in an Xrnty Stew Putting up a niosttuito bar alter lattoo. C t . . llunttnt' 't tlrx sptti tn tht' tent during a rain gt' Szlyfy-frgfil

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JEFFERSONIAN -l-1 Opinions, Personal, Concerning my Month az' Jefferson Barracks lt was scsnze tinie in Nay that I received,through the mail, an application to attend a Citizens hlilitary Camp to be held at JeHerson Barracks, Rlissouri, during the month of August. 11922. Back in IQZI I received a similiar application and, as curiosity killed the cat, I filled it out and went to Camp Pike, Arkansas. This year I filled out this application blank and sent it back to Col. Clendenin by return mail. About July Ist I began receiving interesting literature and information relative to what a splendid time I would have at Jefferson Barracks, and needless to say I really expected a good time. July 20th I received my final to travel to Jefferson Barracks, to arrive there not later than August ISK. Sometimes I would sit for hours, it would seem, and contemplate the pleasures of the vacation that was awaiting me at jefferson Barracks. I would sleep in large brick barracks with showers in the basement, and rest upon good beds with springs in them and on good mattresses, and dine in unique little mess halls for each company, besides all sorts of athletics including baseball, swimming, boxing, etc., etc. Really I would be glad to quit my temporary vacation job at Xlontgomery Ward 8 Company to come to such a place for such an ideal vacation. August Ist, 9:00 o'clock at night found me at Jefferson Barracks. I was not sleeping in a spring bed on a soft mattress nor was l quartered in a brick barracks room with showers in the basement. I was to sleep on a cot in a tent with the cold, cruel ground as my floor, eat in a large crowded mess hall, drill hard and drill d- hard every day, do K. P. and serve on special details. Now it is time for the camp to disband and I have lots of things to say regarding the life as I found it in camp As hard as I have drilled in the field, kissed by the rays of the Sun of the Sahara, and sweat till my shirt shed water like an umbrella on a rainy day, l have not regretted my stay in this camp. I would not take a large sum for the experiences encountered here. Iam sure that the benefits derived have more than equalled the time and efforts invested. I lost one pound in weight, but gained one inch in chest expansion. Xly face is much brighter since my service here. Also my duty here has shown me how to look upon men in a clearer light than I ever did before. During the course of the camp there were,of course,many things that did not agree with all of us at the same time. Taking into consideration all of the things that we dis- liked, I am sure that the good things more than out-weighed the former. l have not regretted my month in Jefferson Barracks and hope that you have not either, Buddy . and intend to be here to finish up with my Blue Course next year, and then if l qualify, to be a regular guy in the commissioned reserves. N ours until it is onion time in Bermuda and you will be my Yalentine. l'iDc:.xR B. Ii1eHM,xN, Reporter. Writer Szlvfy-.r,'.'ri1

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JEFFERSONIAN 'lil1t-t'o111pa11y street was desertedg the n1eu had eu 111a1ched over to meet the payntaster and ILQUIX e tl1e1rtratisportzltioii refund. .X lone I'tXUIxIl' walked Llp to the company com- 1n111tler and explained i11 wailing tones that he I1 td l1tt11 uttts '- 'isarily absent when the n1e11 had ftllt-11 111. The following conversation ensued: Rookieee Sir, what arrangenient shall I make IIHOIII reeeiviiig 111y money Captaiiie--e l suppose vo11 had better see tI1e Y 111111 i11 charge of quartersf . .. . . , . IiUOIilC 'HSII'. if its 1ust the same to I tl rather get mi11e in dollar billsfl If gleam of stars and moon and sun, Could e'er be blended into one, XX'ould they be brighter than your eyes, XX'hose brilliancy I highly prize? They would, beloved, l surmise. Could bolted door or guardhouse bar, Or deserts stretching Wide and far, Keep me from you, so sweet so good. Could distance dull my hardihoodf Dear one, I must confess it could. Colonele'f XVl1o brought you herefu Rookie- Two guards. Colonel'4'Drunk, I suppose? Rookie- Yes, sir, both of them. CILILIIACI'-'HXXVINJ is there? X'oice- 'Cl1aplain.'l C'iua1'd--f .Xdvance, Charlie. I Hush little flapper, lloult you cry' Xioulll get his big button lly e and bye. llere's where l prove an artist. 'l'heCade1 quickly cried. .Xnd qttivering drew tl1e loy ely maid lip closer to his side. H ' Xly supper IS cold. 'l'he eadet swore with vi111. il'ht11 the mess sergeant Illliklk' it Quite WLIVIII for him. .X ittokie had il little lamb, 'l'l1e111ess sergearit killed it dead. Xutl 111-11' tl1e1'ooki1-takes his lamb n lietttec-1111111l11.111lys'1flJ1'e21d. l'.XCilXl'.liRj kllltllltll s:11tl IJIX gun was tlll'lX, X11tl I ls.l'lt'I,X that I11-11':1s1'1gI11. l.1l-Q .1 tot-It ,tl ljltly .1111lSl1f11tl, lihe' 1111- 41111.11 s 4lI'l1lllL'l3l'l!lll. I .111 111'1l lltultie I Illltsl lean' you. I 11111--1leaxeyougo:-l1tIe1'11o111tk. I lll111tl1'111etl1l l can Soldier. XX ith II f4l11.1eI and :1 l'it'l.. you, Ist l.ieut.- I wish you would look the other way. Rookie Student- I ca11't help the way I look, git 'I XXfearily the lfxeeutive labored at his desk. Opposite the Camp Commander was busily en- gaged. linter Red Students. Tommie and XX'illie who are brothers. Both have spent a strenuous day in camp and have had their 1111iforms on all of two hours. They are veterans in every sense of the word and feel strongly the waste of time spent at such a camp as this. Tommie fthe olderl scratching his head and supporting himself on the Executives desk- Say fellow, we wants to get in the regulars, does this camp stop us?,l Executive promptly refers the two soldieis to the Camp Commander. They shuffle into the .Xugust Presence unabashed. Both scratch their ears and heads vigorously and finally stammer out in chorus- Say, does this camp keep us from entering in the regulars?', The K. O.-'fNo, how old are you?'l Students admit to IQ and ll years respectively. The K. O.-f'XVell, you will haye to have a letter of permission. Students again in chorus-'LOh, she said it would be alright. XVe could write to-night. but we ainlt got arty stampsf' The K. O. feels in his pockets for change but doesn't seem to find any money. The Assistant Executive feels in his but knows very well that he will not find any money. He is too poor. Finally the question is settled by a master stroke. The K. O.-Hlflere, take this 11016 to the Re- cruiting Officer in the morning. Exit students. One in soto voce murmurs- Gee, l wonder if I can get off K. P. o11 thisf, Alohnnie had iust arrived and been clothed as a citizen soldier. Having nothing to do and fear- ful that he might miss something he entered Camp l'leadquarters to look the staff over. lle found the lixecutive Officer present and gazed HCIlHlI'lll2ly in a mute fashion until Col. Clendenin asked l1in1 what he wanted. Linabashed ,Iohnie admitted that he wanted nothing. tDid he come to the right place?1 lipon this statement, the ldxeeutive Officer informed him that this was Camp lleadquarters and that he would not appear here unless sent for. XVhereat .Iohnie unafraid, blunted out-f'Say, what do you get i11 here anyhow? There was no audible reply. Captain bavvliug Ollt Cadet for disorder-Af Xioung 111an what would X'Ull do if yo11 were i11 111y shoes? Cadetffubir, l'tl shine them, Sergeant-f XX'l1at was that last card l dealt to you, Xlike. ' l'rivate Xlikef .X spade. Sergeautf- I thought so, I saw ytlll spit on . . . , , your hand before you pieked II up. - 1 P1151' Sftfy-111111'