James Whitcomb Riley High School - Hoosier Poet Yearbook (South Bend, IN)

Page 26 text:

For The Final Accounting I hate to bother you, sir, but if you have c moment to spare, I ' d like to talk to you about my grade. It ' s just that I feel I did more this semester than you gave me credit for. My final? That bad, huh? But I do feel my work during the semester was very good. Kinda good? Above average? That bad, huh? 22

Page 25 text:

With feet propped up on desk , the back-row flunkie nonchalantly flips his gum wrapper toward the wastebosket in the front of the room. He thumbs through his collection of comic books, Mad magazine, etc., and yawns at the world in gen- eral. The semester wears on. With the ominous threat of final exams looming before him, beads of cold sweat appear on his forehead as his ever-present grin begins to waver. As he steps into the room on the day before finals, his dusty, mold-encrusted textbook is clutched in his sweaty paw. The chair rests on all four legs for a change, as he feverishly scribbles on scraps of paper the knowledge of a semester, and he laboriously assem- bles a set of beautiful crib notes. Research for my term paper? ' Course not, never do today wtict you can do tomorrow for something may occur to make you regret your premature move. These inventive students (names v ithheld on request) experiment v ith their new ■ T ' ' --. « method of cramming for finals ... bridge anyone? Note proper position for homework: back straight, knees bent feet flat down. After all it doesn ' t soy which side should b up! The next day a sly grin cracks his otherwise sleep-robbed countenance as he hunches over his paper like a miser examining his gold. By now the smile is beginning to droop at the corners as he reads down the list of questions searching for one he has answers for. His jaw hangs loosely in its sockets, and his wrinkled, dripping brow indi- cates our hero is a bit unsure of his performance. After masticating two pencils and seven fingernails, emitting a few groans, and scratching his skull until dandruff begins to obscure his blank test paper, another small-time cribster hits the dust. In the back rows of many classrooms this semes- ter we see small, crumpled, sobbing figures trying to figure out where their well-planned schemes went awry. 21

Page 27 text:

Well, anyway, I believe homework should be very important in determining the final grade, and . . . I did not! I admit we did work together on some assign- ments, but I would never copy . . . By the way, what was my homework average? Oh — I see. But still, my class participation was exceptional. Oh, so you thought so too. You know I ' m glad you noticed that because I worked very . . . You didn ' t mean that kind of participation? Well, I can easily understand why you might feel that way ... I did mess around a little in the beginning, but I settled down, oh yes, I settled down. I really learned a lot from this class, sir. I learned to appreciate a good teacher like you so much. I mean that! Have you ever thought of teaching college? My objective in this course? A gra ... I mean knowledge, yes sir, I am ever seeking wisdom, the foundation of the uni- verse, the secret of the ages, the answer to . . . Why am I complaining then? You know, that ' s a darn good question. Yes, sir, I am. No, sir, I ' m not. The grade is very important, but . . . No? Positive? Absolutely posi . . .? Well, I didn ' t mean to bother you. You ' re not. That ' s good because I ' d hate to . . . Oh, I am sorry! I didn ' t realize how busy you were. Yes, thank you, sir. ' (es, sir, I will, sir . . . any time at all . . . thank you again . . . sir. 5 V ' 5N ' 23