Ipswich High School - Tiger Yearbook (Ipswich, MA)

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“To Antoinette Burns and Violet Lev- esque, both of diminutive stature, pre- sent these stilts so that they may come up with the rest of the world. “Give this speedometer to Lillian Brown so that she may be furnished with a check that will prevent her exceeding: the speed limit when typewriting. “Alice Scott, who so ably managed the candy store at school, promote to thd management of this store. “Vera Blaisdell, so I hear, is always boiTOwing someone else’s powder puff. Give this one to her so that she may dis- continue this annoying and unsanitary practice. Incidentally, it may help her to maintain her reputation for good looks. “Evelyn Webber, I understand, is go- ing to follow a musical career. I’m sure that this pitch pipe will be of ser- vice. “This pillow give to Edna Peabody. It is to be taken on all skiing trips and used when necessary. “To Dorothy Harrigan, who, as you know, has the pernicious habit of get- ting very much excited about trifles, give this bottle of soothing syrup. “To Vera Morong throw this ball and see if she can catch it as easily as she did the “mumps,” concluded Mephisto. Before I had time to thank him, he had disappeared, and I was left alone with my papers WILMOT HALL. CLASS GIFTS TO BOYS Several days ago I was invited by one of my friends to go to Ellis Island. While I was there I saw many people; some from Russia, France, Spain and Italy. I talked with manv of them in their native tongue because they couldn’t speak Eng. lish. They told me that they were all waiting to be examined so that they might enter the “land of promise.” None of them seemed to realize that they might be sent back to their native land because the quota from their country was filled. After talking with several men and women, I came to a woman with a shawl around her head. Her face was wrinkled with age. She told me that she had come from Russia and that she had several sons and a daughter here and had come to America three times to visit them, but each time had been turned back because the quota was filled. After telling me about the life she had lived in Russia, she said, “Now, my dear, I have told you my tiouDles. You must have some. Won’t you tell me yours?” I told her that my greatest trouble was the task of finding suitable gifts for the boys of the graduating class. She told me to name the boys, and that by her motions I might be able to get some idea of an appropriate gift for each boy. First I named Jarvis Cartledge. After a few seconds she began to smooth her hair with her hand like this. I thought she wanted me to give him a wig to remind him of the Senior play, but no, she kept rubbing harder and harder. Suddenly a new idea came to me and I saw Cartledge trying but in vain, to keep his hair smooth; so for you, Cartledge, I have this bottle of slikum that you may never be troubled again by those unmanageable locks. I named Raymond Callahan second. Without a minute’s hesitation she began, to make a noise as though she were try- ing to cough. It reminded me of the cough Callahan had contracted during the freshman year and which still effects him seriously at times. Callahan, I pity a boy who has the same cough for four years and I am going to give you a bottle of cough medicine SO that you may never be troubled in the future with your cough. When I named Harry Saunders, the woman began to act as though she were sprinkling something on her head and vigorously rubbing it in. I wondered what she meant, but after a while it came to me that I had heard Edna say that she liked brunettes better than blonds, so for you, Saunders, I have this bottle of hair dye. This was all the time the woman had, foi she was called by one of the officers to be examined. For the rest I had to fall 24

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ed to break up the whole performance by making up such peculiar faces that the other players were too convulsed to con- tinue. Then, ' too, he was so innocent himself that it was long before the blame for the disturbance was finally fixed where it rightfully belonged. Most of the boys of the class took the opportunity extended to them by the Ro- tary Club and went on the trip to Bos- ton. All of them got home safe and sound although one of the cars in which ;;ome of our boys were riding did get mixed up in a funeral and threatened to break up the whole procession. The girls also enjoyed a trip to Boston under the auspices of the Rotary Club members’ wives. We hear that a more elaborate lunch was prepared for them on the ground that girls always eat a great deal more than boys, which is no doubt true. The parade of that week is worthy of mention because it is the only occasion on record on which Gould was so weighted down with the seriousne ss ' of his position as military leader that he forgot to smile. During this year there has been an epidemic of bobbed hair and mumps from which even dignified seniors have not been immune. We are hardly pre- pared at this time to state which is the more conducive to good looks. For the latter part of the year prepar- ations for graduation and class day have occupied most of our time and attention. During a few bright sunny days on the first of the month, we all repaired to the front lawn and had our pictures tak- en for “The Tiger.” When you gaze at our likenesses on the pages of that well known publication, we hope you will be reminded of the cost and sacrifice which made those pictures possible, for we hear that Gould’s camera has been out of commission ever since. The preparations now, however, are complete and we are looking foi ' ward to receiving tomorrow evening the reward of our four year’s labors. The last page of our history will not be written until Saturday evening when we are anticipating a good time on the occa- sion on which we meet together as a class for the last time. Our past history, however, has indeed been a happy one, and I am wishing a happy future to the class of 1924 and to all succeeding classes. ANGELO MINICHIELLO. GIFTS TO GIRLS Last evening I sat up late trying to think of some gifts that I might give to the girls of 1924. No inspirations came to me. I was just about to collect my papers and retire when suddenly before me there appeared a figure, indistinct at first, but oon it became clearer. I could see that it was a man carrying a bundle, but I did not recognize him. Al- most immediately, however, he spoke and in a deep voice said, “I am Mephisto, the god of the lower world. As I heard that you were troubled about some of my fu- ture subjects, I have come to help you.” He stopped for a moment and then went on. “This megaphone give to Mar- garet Hawksworth so that in the future she may have the joy of being heard the first time that she says anything. “To Davida Perley I want you to give this Laboratory Guide in order that fu- ture hours spent in the laboratory may be more impiring. “As you know. Hazel Smith is always fk rgetting things. You remember how she was always writing thousands of spelling words because he forgot she had any. Give her this memorandum to lengthen her memory. She’ll . need one out in the big cold world. “I am sure that this fan will aid Zella Zuoski in flirting with a certain male member of the class and also in hiding her blushes. “Here is a pair of scissors given as a souvenir and reward by the United Bar- bers’ Association to the person who does the mose to help barbers, and as Made- line Chase started the bobbed hair craze in your class, I think that she should have them. -23

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CLASS PROPHECY back on my own resources. We all know that Minichiello lives at Rices’ where things are rather slow. For him, therefore, I have this giant fire cracker SO that he can make things hum. For Charles Denningham I bought this little dictionary. Charlie uses such long words that I thought he might some day swallow a dictionary, and if he did, he might choke if he tried to swallow a large one. I therefore bought him one that would digest easily. Gould’s passions for women are, like Poe’s, intense but fleeting. Just at pres- ent, however, I think a compass would prevent him from getting lost when com- ing home late at night from Linebrook. We all read in the “Tiger” about Bo- kron’s winning a marathon. The reason for this, it was said, was that he was sur- prised by a fierce dog. If this method proves effective in one case, it ought to prove so in another; so for you Fannon I have this fierce dog that you may up- hold the seniors standard in track, I have this large banana for Karigean- es so that he will never be placed in the embarrassing situation of having to re- ply, “Yes, we have no Bananas” to his customers. I am going to give Hall this little doll for a “Wile.” I am told that it took McCarthy on one occasion a week to go to Rowley and back for his report card. I have this fly- ing machine for him so that he will be able to accomplish the journey in much less time. Boylan is following in the footsteps of his father by taking up the plumbing trade so I bought him this set of tools that they might lead him on to the road of success. Last but not least, to be sure, is Bean. I judge from Bean’s actions that he likes flowers. For him therefore I have a Vio- let. At last the task of finding gifts for the boys is comipleted and I’m sure I hope ev- erybody is satisfied. ALICE SCOTT. This trip which I have been looking forward to for such a long time has final- ly been completed. But what a delight- ful trip it has turned out to be! You have no idea how pleasant it was to get my plane out of the hanger these beau- tiful days and to fly over this country and across to Europe and elsewhere to call on my class mates. To be sure I did get into trouble with the aerial police once for flying on the wrong side of the air line and again when I disregarded the speed limit of 560 miles an hour. However the aerial judge was a kind old man who held court in a huge dirigible floating three miles above the surface of the earth. At first he did not appear so kind for he gave the young fellow ahead pf me a severe sentence, and when I, terribly frightened, was led before him, he cUr - missed the traffic officer and turning to me with a stern look on his face said, “Look here. Madam, do you know that for your offense you could serve five years?” Startled by this, I, picturing iron bars all around me, must have tottered, for suddenly he rushed from behind his desk, shook me, and said, “For Heaven’s sake, Vera, you know I was only joking.” I came to at these words and gazed at him. “Why, Vera, have you forgotten your old class mate?” Then seeing that I had, he started to take off his robe and cap. Then what a change! For when he re- moved his cap, the funniest thing hap- pened — a golden braid fell down his back and I recognized not a “him” — but our darling Zella. “Zella Zuoski!” I cried, and I flew in- to her arms. When we had got our breath again, I told her that I was on a tour hunting up our old classmates. Then she informed me that at any other time I should have met Margaret Hawksworth, her assistant, who was now having her vacation 25