Iowa Wesleyan College - Croaker Yearbook (Mount Pleasant, IA)

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Impossible A man was seen standing before a billboard in Toronto shouting: “It can't be done! It can’t be done!” “What can’t be done?” inquired an inquisitive spectator. The man dumbly pointed to a sign, which read: “DRINK CANADA DRY” Where Ignorance Is Bliss Dora was so dumb that she thought that— An echo is merely a hole in the wind. A normal school is where they teach normalcy. An Aspirin tablet is something to write on. A grid leak is a rainstorm on a football field. A fire plug is a new kind of chew. A mixed metaphor is some kind of cocktail. The Farm Bureau is a piece of furniture. Rebate means to put on a fresh worm. I lie Kentucky Derby is a southern hat. The Board of Kducation hangs out in the lumber yard. The weather bureau is part of a bedroom set. Lansing. Mich., is a major operation. Marcelled hair is a new way to cook rabbit. Davenport, la., is a sheik’s workbench. A march can be played on the ear drums. Chilling Thought “Speaking of bathing in famous springs,” remarked the tramp, “that reminds me that I bathed in the spring of ’98.” Both Dumb She: “The Lord made us beautiful and dumb.” It: “How’s that?” She: “Beautiful so men would love us—and dumb so that we could love them.” Page 21S

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Best, Cheapest, and Cleanest COAL AND COKE Of All Kinds Delivered to All Parts of the Citv H. H. HILLS Phone 54 • -$K® 3 S ® $ $ e ® S s S $ S S Automotive Animal Life A balky mule has four wheel brakes, A billy goat has bumpers. The firefly is a bright spotlight, Rabbits are puddle jumpers. Camels have balloon-tired feet And carry spares of what they eat, But still I think that nothing beats The kangaroos with their rumble seats. His Seat of Trouble My brother surely loved the bees, He always was their friend, He used to sit upon their hives, But they stung him in the etui. FANKHAUSER DAIRY CO. Mt. Pleasant, Ia. Queen Quality Butter and Ice Cream Doctors Recommend a Plate of Ice Cream Daily for Health Milk, Coffee Cream, and Whipping Cream Page 217

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The most reliable and latest styles in jeu)elry can be bought at BAUMLE - ANDERSON CO. JEWELERS 319 Jefferson St. Burlington, Iowa A visitor at Hollywood met an old friend, now a movie director, who invited him to visit the studio stating that during the next afternoon they expected to film a nude woman riding a horse down the boulevard. “Sure, 1 11 come,” said the friend; “it’s a long time since I saw a horse.” Adam: “Wonderful night, a beautiful girl—what a combination!” Eve: “Goodness! ! Is that showing?” (iirl: “Why did you kiss me—when you are a perfect stranger?” Hoy: “It’s the doctor’s orders. He says I must avoid all excitement, and it excited me to sit beside the most beautiful creature I have ever seen and not kiss her. Girl: “Well, of course if it’s the doctor’s orders I suppose it’s all right.” O’SHEA KNITTING MILLS MAKERS OF Athletic Knitted Wear for Every Sport 241-1-24 North Sacramento Avenue CHICAGO Page 219