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Page 213 text:
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Croaker gUmanac for Spril 1915 APRIL HATH XXX DAYS JOIRYSE EDITION MELANCHOLY POME FOR APRIL MEANDERINGS If all the people who knock the Croaker were put in a straight line they would reach from Oakland Mills to Klondike. If all the people who praise the Croaker were put in a Ford runabout there would be several good seats left. If all of the brains used up on this almanac had been concentrated on study we could have obtained an A. B. degree in one month. 10 words make one joke. 10 jokes make one humor department. 10 humor departments make one weary. When you are asked to sing a solo, Don’t run away and hide; But learn the words beforehand, And get the air outside. Philosophical Philbert Scz: “When ye git spring fever there’s nothin’ like leadin’ the Wesleyan N'gjvs. A ow April’s here with showers sweet. It comes hut once a year. It brings us flowers and muddy feet. And birds tee love to hear. Thur. Fri. Sat. Sun. Mon. Tucs. Wed. Thur. Fri. Sat. Sun. Mon. Tucs. Wed. Thur. Fri. Sat. Sun. Mon. Tues. Wed. Thur. Fri. Sat. Sun. Mon. Tucs. Wed. Thur. Fri. 1 2 3 Spring Vacation. 4 5 6— Peary appears at North Pole (1909). 7— Look out for walk-before-breakfast liars. $—Contributor brings in old joke. 9—Life flows on as usual. 10— Last session held in German Chapel. 11— Everybody goes down ‘K’ Line. 12— Pipe organ dedicated. Prexy claps too soon. 13— Glad to be back in chapel. 14— Just prayer meeting day. 15— The sun rose and set as usual. 16— Lost! One whole period in the library.— Aenid Beman. 17— Well known planet, the earth, quakes at San Francisco. 18— Usual Sunday quiet prevails. 19— Monmouth defeats us in baseball. 20— Seniors dig in library over thesis. 21— Y. M. Geneva breakfast at Cole's Pond. 22— Croaker Staff announced. 23— Shakespeare born (1564). 2-1—Knox Freshmen fail to show up to debate our Freshmen. 25— Regular weekly Sunday. 26— Bishop Hughes lectured. Couples strolled today. 27— Ponce de Leon looks for fountain of youth (1513), Lillian Russell finds it (1913). 28— Prexy was at chapel. 29— J. P. Morgan visits Egypt (1913). Even the Nile has banks now. 30— Girls number of It'cslcyan A7 ws issued.
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Page 212 text:
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AGRICULTURALLY SPEAKING Ereshic: “I think it is just lovely to hear the leaves whisper.” Dukes: “Yes, but I can’t bear to hear the grass mown.” Mary had a little lamb, Lank and lean and bony; When Mary college Latin took She swapped it for a pony. ! | AT -GLEE CLUB PRACTICE Craver: “I just love to break into song.” Ballcw: “If you would get the key you wouldn’t have to break in.” NATURALLY First Student: “What is the first thing you think of in connection with French? Second Student: “The French teacher.” MOST CERTAINLY Stranger (to Emmet Hasty) : “Do they teach French here?” Hasty: “Yes, they teach anyone.” FOUND IN THE CHEMISTRY ROOM Mother, may I go out to swim? My daughter, I reckon so. Hang your clothes on a hickory limb And shun the H..O. AT FRESHMAN CLASS ELECTION Chairman: “Nominations are now in order for a vice-president.” Miss Martin: “We do not need a vice-president. There is no vice in this class. ’ ECONOMY Jay Hunter (when asked if he would lend a nickel) : “Well, fellows, I’ll let you have it, but I have to have it back by tomorrow. I must have spending money.” NO NAMES MENTIONED Matron: “Did that young fellow kiss you last night?” Co-ed: “Do you think he came all the way he did to hear me play the piano?”
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