Iowa Wesleyan College - Croaker Yearbook (Mount Pleasant, IA)

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Hamline Hall—A large room provided by Hamline Literary for the use of engaged couples. Ilershey Hall—A house on the west campus enclosed by a wire fence to keep the chickens in. K-Line—A track built for Wesleyan strollers, but sometimes used by the railroad company. Library—“A place for study and not visiting” (A la Swan). Matinee—An afternoon show, which the girls can attend without Miss Rader’s consent. Rushing—A temporary popularity, mostly among girls. Training—The act of going to bed and not eating anything. T. W.—A man who never has dates except to the lecture course and athletic games, and she a student. JOKES AND STUFF (Bone Heads) Miss Baldwin: “So many ministers preach from the text—A short bed and a narrow covering.” Miss Rader: “Dr. Osborne preached from that too.” Miss Baldwin: “Do they find that text in the Bible?” Betty J.: “I have to read Genesis for Bib. Lit.” Florence Milligan: “Which comes first, Genesis or Exodus?” Nell Jacobs (in a perplexed voice) : “Say, is Jericho one of the books of the Bible? I can’t find it in the index.” IN ENGLISH CLASS Anita and Jeff have the same topic to recite upon, and Anita recites first. Prof. Blair: “Mr. Jeffrey, can you add anything?” Jeff: “No, sir.” Prof.: “It’s a wise man that knows when not to speak.” Freshman (gazing at Mr. Peterson): “Say, ‘Pete,’ your legs would be lots longer if there wasn’t so much turned under at the bottom.” Dutch”: “Who uses all the snuff which is manufactured?” Pete”: “No one nose.” NOT ASHAMED OF IT James: “Are you a Latin student?” Pete”: “No, Swede.”

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 THE CROAKER ABRIDGED DICTIONARY (Carefully and prayerfully prepared by Committee on Who’s Who and Why) Athletics—(See 4th century bull fight.) A mysterious magic that misleads young men into getting a college education. Bell—A machine owned by the college and used to wake students who have fallen asleep in class. Bluffing—The means used in procuring a diploma. (2) A quality unknown to Freshmen but inherent in Seniors. Blues—A contagious disease prevalent among Freshman girls in the fall of the year. Broke—A condition inherent among fussers. (Syn.) All in, lend me a nickel, I want to be tough. Bulletin Board—A place existing primarily for the benefit of budding artists and other unfortunate ones who wish their names before the public. Campustry—A mild form of recreation, made popular by dry class room lectures. Case—A state of continual association between persons mutually fooled. Commencement—A time of joy to the Freshmen, pleasure to the Sophomore, pride to the Junior, an awakening to the Senior and a relief to the Faculty. College—The only spot in town where you cannot find the sign—No Loafing Allowed. Conservatory—A building often mistaken by strangers for the State Asylum. Co-ed—The only argument for co-education. Coach—A person who has speaking acquaintance with Spaulding’s rule books, and at the same time does not particularly mar the beauty of the landscape. Chapel—A place of devotion (for cases). A time set aside for visiting and practical jokes. Chapel Steps—The hub of the social whirl (at night). Cramming—(1) A temporary renaissance. (2) A feed indulged in twice a .year by bluffers. Croaker—A book, the Editor of which is afraid to publish even half the truth concerning some things, for fear of ruining the college. Dancing—? ??????? Eats—A sound, the velocity of which exceeds that of any other known word. Election—A necessary evil. An event which causes many temporary friendships to be established, and old friendships broken. Enrolling—“A highly ingenious form of extortion.” Faculty—Any dried collection. Flunk—A pass home. The result of too much oil burned in other than your own lamp. Formal—A punishment inflicted upon the most popular. A custom which makes it necessary to have greenhouses and cab-lines. V, I •■'V

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 r V 7: A MYSTERY SOLVED One day, either by accident or fortune the Editor found himself almost lost among the tall long rows of books in the rear of the college library. He had not been there long when between some books he caught a glimpse of some one entering and heard the familiar voice of Dollie Barker say, “Why, Grace, you’re just the girl I’m looking for. Why, Grace, just look here!” Fearing that the only opportunity of a lifetime had come and might be gone in an instant, the Editor ventured one peek through the row of books and there were the two above mentioned girls poring over a large colored newspaper which bore the following head lines across the entire sheet, in large display type: “10,000 BRIDES WANTED IN THE PHILIPPINES.” No wonder they are thinking of teaching in the Philippines. TO THE CHAFING DISH The chafing dish is a frying pan with a college education. Its value is to ruin the girl’s digestion. It can be used between the hour of ten and twelve P. M. The fuel used is alcohol, but is the variety which can not be drunk, therefore not intoxicating to use in a chafing dish. The handles are made of ebony because this wood is black. Chafing dishes are made of nickel, and may be used as a mirror, when one’s room mate is monopolizing the only one the room affords. Its limbs resemble those of a spider. The chafing dish is a two-story affair and takes up too much room in one’s trunk. Anything from a lemon pie to cocoa may be made in a chafing dish providing the participants are willing. C ut classes. A bandon everything. M ake excuses. P lan carefully. U se bluffing. S it on the grass. T ake dates. R ush everything. Y ou’ll succeed in this course. Oh, bury the knocker out in the woods In a beautiful hole in the ground, Where the grasshopper hops and the woodpecker pecks And the straddle bug straddles around. Prof. Edwards (in Jr. Physics) : “Mr. Pogemiller, if sounds don’t all travel at the same velocity, what would be the use of having such a conglomeration as this thing we call our band?” T 03