Iowa Wesleyan College - Croaker Yearbook (Mount Pleasant, IA)

Page 192 text:

w rr r 7 TIMES ARE VERY DIFFERENT NOW FROM TIIE TIMES THAT USED TO BE You often hear it noised about, how the world is growing good, But when a fellow tells me that, I smile and say, “Knock on wood.” Now et’s go back to boyhood days, and rehearse our lives anew, And compare the things that they do now, to the things they used to do. Now if the world is growing better, there’s one thing you will agree, That times are mighty different now, from the times that used to be. They used to say of girls those days, sweet sixteen was never kissed, But now they’d wonder how it was, that she was ever missed. They used to wear a neat plain dress, at morning, noon and night, But now a hobble diaphanous skirt, that won’t shut out the light. Modest ways they had those days, no skirts slit to the knee, But times are mighty different now, from the times that used to be. Young men those days went courting, afoot down through the lane, Now it’s, “Dad, the auto’s out of date, I want an aeroplane.” Those days they danced the old quadrille, playing Dixie on the fiddle. Now it’s turkey trot and bunnie hug, while they writhe and hug and wiggle. Now the world may be growing better, to a man up in a tree, But times are mighty different now from the times that used to be. They sang “Sweet Annie Laurie” and “Tell Mother I’ll Be There,” Now it’s “Everybody’s Doin’ It,” “Oh, You Kid” and “It’s a Bear.” A lady was a lady, you bet, they didn’t have a wrestling match nor smoke a cigarette. They didn’t wear those real short skirts, which make men look longer, see, Hut times are mighty different now, from the times that used to be. When father said, “Son, when school is out, come straight home in a hurry.” lie did it then, now he goes to the skating rink, says, “ Ilec, dad, I should worry.” Now mother says to Nellie dear, seated in lovers’ runabout, “Please don’t stay after two A. M.” Nellie says. “Now, mother, cut that out.” Now the world may be growing better, but you can plainly see, That times are mighty different now, from the times that used to be. No oriental rugs were in their homes, telephone, electric this and that. But “God Bless Our Home” was on the wall, and “Welcome” on the mat. No autos then on Sunday morn, to go one hundred miles away, But a mile or two and that would do, in the one horse open shay. Those were the days of real sport, they were happy just as we, But times are mighty different now from the times that used to be. Appropriated.

Page 191 text:

 r k % Ul ■ r JUNIOR ENGLISH CLASS Anita: “I read the Orphan, it is just a real love story.” Prof.: “It didn’t amount to much then.” Anita: “Yes, it did—it’s just fine.” Miss Boyer, having named the hooks of the New Testament perfectly. Dr. Leist remarked, “You ought to he a preacher, or the next thing to it. a preacher's wife.” SURE “Pete”: “There is going to be a total eclipse of the sun in August.” Phil: “When will it be, in the day time?” Frances: “Don, do tell me what the moon is.” Don Lawson: “I am not prepared, ask the Secretary of the Y’ for information.” Dr. Lymer in Senior Education told of one man’s experience in proposing. “They were out skating and broke through the ice. On the way home they were so cold that he thought proposing might warm them so he asked the momentous question.” Later Ollie Mauch was heard to remark, “I think it was a mean trick for the Dean to tell such a story now that the ice is all gone.” ALMOST Bill: “Did you see ‘Everywoman’ in Burlington last week?” Thomas (blushing) : “Oh, no—not quite.” You can’t drive a nail with a sponge, no matter how many times you soak it. j§. fill

Page 193 text:

 A CRUEL WORLD Peterson: “Well, I'd like to know what Jesus Christ would think if he’d come down here and see how things are-going.’’ “IT PAYS TO ADVERTISE” (Clipping from the Evening News) “Wanted—A position as house-keeper. Widower with children preferable. Suitable references furnished. Apply in writing. Edith Rogers Powers, Hershey Hall.” 4-16-da lt-p UNIVERSALLY CONCEDED Conductor (to one of the Glee Club girls): “Your fare, miss.” She: “Do you really think so?” KEEP THE CHANGE Bill C.: “Say, Prof, I'm indebted to you for all I know.” Prof. Leist: “Stop, I pray, don’t mention such a trifle.” ONLY STANDING ROOM LEFT Tramp (to himself after hasty leave taking): “What a brute of a dog—not only made me get up, but had the nerve to take my seat.” Wahl: “Say, Freshie, do you know about the Freshman don’ts?” Thompson: “No, but I know all about the Freshman dues.” Beggar: “Please help me recover my child.” Kind Woman: “Is your child lost?” Beggar: “No, mum, his clothes are worn out.” IT WOKE HIM UP Neutzman: “I saw a game of ball between a ‘Hungry Nine’ and a ‘Starvation Nine’.” Coach Beal: “What was the score?” Neutzman: “Nothing to ate.” “A lot of so-called society leaders are never heard of until they figure in some kind of scandal.” It is a wise saw that possesses wisdom teeth.”