Indiana University School of Dentistry - Prognosis Yearbook (Indianapolis, IN)

Page 63 text:

Tillie THE. SHXTIZEN HDENT QJD3Ej There was an old man from Torrentum Who chewed his false teeth till he bent 'umg I X When asked for the cost s 4 y Of what he had lost X X He said, It ain't nothing, I rent 'um. K f Q A dentist there was, so benighted, Q i A ' He never knew when he was slightedg X- 9, - Q Q - He went to a party And ate just as hearty 3-r As if he'd been really invited. uv- atsilc mth . There was a young man from Leconia Whose mother-in-law had pneumoniag They hoped for the worst, And April the first A dentist bold, from I. D. C., They buried her 'neath a begonia. Started on his way a great man to be, With nerve that was vital, but putrescent breath The devil got up from his warm little bed, That drove away patients-the rest you can guessg He washed his face and combed his headg His wail was hard luck, but you can soon see Now I'm asking a question I hadn't oughter, The moral of this little tale-D0n't have fl bad breath. Where in H--- did he get the water? EDGAR G, LENHoFF. ALBERT J. XVARBER.

Page 62 text:

IQIIEI THE CSHKTEIZN EDEN? j BAECHER-- How much? BELT- Why not? BEHMLANDER-- I should say. BODKIN- Just out. BRAUCHLA- I Flunked in Crown BRYANT- Where's the girls? CARBERRY- Use Sphenoilf' COPE- I reckon. COSLER- I know it. DAVIS- Take my advice, boys. DEAKYNE- What's the use. DEYIN- Let's cut up. R. L. DILL- Hey, Cookie! E. M. DILL- Who's got two bits? DONOUGH- Never again. EDDY- Sound your A. ICICHOFF- Hey, thercg you! ICLSWORTH-MI don't see that. l ALI.- That's too sudden. FOSTER- Oh! us girls. l RliC'H- Rack 'cm up. and Bridge. Junior Stuff FIRDAY- Aw! I flunkedf' GUEDEL- Roll call yet? GUNN-'LNot so loud. HILL-l'Let's have another. HOFFMAN-L'I'm first. JACKSON- What's that hole for? H. HONES- Outside C. JONES- Any admission. KAMM- klein Gottf' KRAMER- Fill 'em up. LEAVELL-L'Wish I had a girl? LIEB-- Just what I thought. LITTLE- Nothing doing. LONG- I don't care. MCNAUGHTON- I'ni alone. MANN- How's this, Dr. Pufferf' INIEYER- Where's George? G. MILLER- Why worry. P. MILLER-L'Kin I ask a question? MILSTEAD-UI can't go. MOONEY- I haven't any. NORMAN- Down at Louisville. PERCIVAL- I got it from Betzf' PETERSON- Check, please. RAMSEY- I got some plug. 1 RICHER-- There it goes. SARTOR-- I saw it first. SESANBAUGHER-'tMe for home SHEPARD-- Any mail for me? SHOWERMAN- Sure, I'll go. B. SMITH- Let's go. M. SMITH- Let me show you. SPEAR- I can't be here. SPENCER-UAW! get out. SPINK- It canlt be did. SPITLER- Don't ask me. C. SULLIVAN- I know her, too. M. SULLIVAN- Just a minute, fellows WELSH-l'Who said so? WHALEY- Hey, Doc I WILLIAMS-HH-E-R-E! ! ! I '

Page 64 text:

Will you step into my parlor?' lsjllle El,T'1T'IHlnz 5-uxj-rg-5-N IDZTNTTT H QQE 5 7 Said the dentist to the guyg It's the swellest dental parlor That ever you did spy. Now have that tooth extracted- You no longer need refraing In my modus operandi There is not the slightest pain. So you step across the threshold Of his cunning little lair, .-Xnd he lands you very quickly In his cushioned dental chair. Then he props your mouth wide open He's a human sort of guy- And he asks you twenty questions When he knows you can't reply. Then a drill that would be famous On the Panama he takes, And Vesuvius is an infant To the earthquake he creates. The Dentist and the yGuy 'Y , After weary hours of torture, Having hammered, ground and drilled Gleefully he then assures you That the nerve must now be killed. Oh, the agony you suffered! Words can scarce describe the pain- While the dentist blandly tells you Of his methods, safe and sane. And he keeps right on tormenting With his hammer, tile and saw In a manner most distracting To that molar in your jaw. Through this pain excruciating, Staring at you all the while There's a mural decoration Asking why you do not smile. Well, you ask me how I know this? Where I got this bloomin' hunch? Let me tell you, gentle reader, That I had a toothache once.