Independence Junior College - Inkanquil Yearbook (Independence, KS)

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PAGE 24 THE INKANQUIL o:n1o:ogo:o:n1u14rioiniuinir Our New Office ls ln The Beldorf Theatre Bldg. DR. MALCOLM V. BROWN M. C. H. S. '11 Exclusive Optometrist Eye Examination By Appointment. Phone 201 lndpendence, Kans - 804- f K 'K Giga ,T 7 A gr K l 9 ul L. 'Rf g., 5 WILL 5. Quick sms: When money moves and l is kept in circulation, it Q means a good business for i us all. Likewise when there Q is anything else to be moved, - hand it over to us, and it ! will mean a better business 5 for us both. Q The Merchants Q Transfer and Storage g 111 can Main Phone is 2 rhesui-orfneam i i . Company Contractor: and Engineers g Heating, Ventilating, Plumbing No Job too large or too small i for us to do. 'Q . E Phone 616 311 N. Penn Q . 'F 11030111 1 111111201 1:11192 BRIGHT SAYINGS At the.last meeting of the facul- ty, Prof. Suderman was unanim- ously chosen to deliver the Library Lectures to the Freshmen. Prof Suderman is well versed in the handling of books and, no doubt, will be an efficient advisor.. One member of the faculty was heard to remark, I hope he impresses the fact upon the students' minds that they must not tear the leaves out of the books. We hope so too because Miss Russell is very severe in her punishment for such an offence. It is with deep regret that 'we hear of the complete, positive and absolute nervous breakdown of Fred CFritzJ Colburn, due to over- work and overstudy. We have all seen how desperately hard Fritz has studied all year. Many have urged him to cease this strenuous work, but to no avail. Startling facts have been reveal- ed-Prof. Montgomery has con- sented, after much persuasion, to pose for the Lucky Tiger Hair Tonic Co. It is understood that Prof. Montgomery is to receive S100 a sitting, and if he sits often enough it is assumed he will ac- cumulate a small fortune. Prof. Montgomery is to be commended for his service to mankind. On many a bottle and sign' board, and in, many a newspaper we wilL meet our own Prof. Montgomery. Infamous Quotations Monotony is the spice of life. Dishonesty is the best policy. Politeness is to do and say the rud- est thing in the rudest way. Never be tardy unless you happen to oversleep. Prof. Owen was seen recently hurrying away from a news stand tucking several magazines under his arm-among them were: Snap- py Stories, Whiz Bang, and the Wild West Weekly. It has been learned that Mr. Myers keeps a very exact schedule with his dates. Six weeks seems to be the limit for each girl. We advise his future wife to persuade him within six weeks or all is lost. Minister: Are you a Christian? 'Harold B.: No, Pm a freshman. Prof. Owen was heard to remark at the beginning ofthe year that he did not believe the Hudson Car was practical, but now whether it is practcal or not he loves to drive or to be driven in one. Yes, we have good evidence, and, besides, Prof. Myers assures us it is true. ...,l..1--..i.-. Can you imagine- Prof. Suderman without his portfolio? Prof. Montgomery with a shock of hair? Prof.. Myers with sheik hair ? Prof. Austin flunking a math exam? Prof. Woods with straight hair? Lola McDaniel being on time? Katherine Potts without her gum? Jimmie Gilmore without Ruth? Jake Endres being quiet? Fritz Colburn embarrassed. Blossom, Salisbury sober? Josephine Blades flunking? Charles Hoffman a great lectur- er. Jimmie Stevens without Margar- ite? C Alford Prescott skinny? Miss Russell with hoop skirts? Bee DeVore without Fritz? Russell Greenlee having a ser- ious thought? Pollyg Burkett with curly hair? Jay Mason missing an athletic game? Qualifications for a Student 1. Must not be afraid of any of the teachers. 2. Must get your bluff in on them. 3. Must be able to throw chalk and erasers accurately. 4. Must arrive 'twenty or thirty minutes late to class at least three mornings in the week. 5. Must bring candy or gum to school every day. 6. Must loaf in the halls, slam the doors and make all confusion possible. 7. Must not pretend to writeg go to sleep instead. 8. Must never ,hand work in on time. We understand that Miss Austin is doing light housekeeping this winter, in order to be prepar- ed-for the worst? . Life is a joke, And, all things show itg Look at the sophomores, And then you'll know it.

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THE INKANQUIL PAGE 23 The buggy-riding party went off without a single mishap, and Marcia developed quite a case with W. J. Summer was fading' into au- tumn., Marcia at a clever lunch- eon had announced her engage- ment to W. J., and on the evening before the ceremony of ceremon- ies was sitting beside her beloved in the comfortable porch swing. They swung gently to and fro, to and fro, thinking of the morrow and all that it would mean to them. Suddenly Marcia turned, facing her handsome fiance. I W. J., tell me. I Yes, honey? How did you happen to pick me out from all the girls in this town when you knew none of us? She waited expectantly, hoping that a love at first sight answer would be forthcoming. How? he smiled impishly, Honey, will you weah a silver doodad around youah ankle to- morrow? Please, just foah me. A -Ferne Duckworth On the-night of the basket ball game at Iola, ten of the students accompanied by Owen and Myers of the faculty went to Iola to at- tend the game. The trip was made in a Ford truck, and the time made is thought to have establish- ed no new speed record. The tem- perature was far below freezing, and ,most of the students were chilled to the bone before the trip was over. The team was much surprised to see the gang stringing in during the intermission be- tween halves. .The trip back was the' slowest and coldest as it seem- ed to those on the back of the truck, and a halt was called at every town in order to warm up with a cup of hot coffee. They arrived home a little before most students were starting to school. Wallace Scott and Theodore Owen were accredited with the honor of being thd best and highest kickers in the' crowd, much to the con- sternation of the proprietors and patrons of the many cafes and' restaurants at which they stopped. The college basket ball team at- tended the fungral of Bob Heck- ert's mother in a body. Flowers wxere sent by the whole student body. ' - ' ALLEGED POETRY The coming of spring New joys doth bring It fills me with gladness and glee All nature is greeng How happy things seem To welcome the bird and the bee. -Harold Bullock Winter days seem long and dreary With nothing in view but the snow In the evening we are weary, Listening to the noisy winds blow. -Claire Brandenburg The train moves up the hill And goes on across the fill The smoke rolls out in an endless string And long string of car go rattle- tee-bing. I -Paul Ferrell One happy day in the month of June When all mother nature was in tune A boy and girl stood under the moon While with his banjo, soft melo- dies they'd croon. -Vera Calkins An engine with a string of cars Came racing down the trackg A hobo rolled from the grimy bars, And landed on his back. -Niles Smith You -said that I was cold and thoughtless That days I love you were few That my heart belongs to another My Dear! If you only knew! -Orrin Wahl As I sit thinking of times past, I see that I have been outclassed. All my friends have now made good, But, in the same old rut I've stood. My childhood friends have given me up Because they drink of a better cup. Oh this old world is a cruel cruel place, And I couldn't win if I held an ace. It's almost time for me to flop, Because this world of mine has stopped. -Fritz Colburn If I just had the right today, To tell you what I'd like to sayg I'd tell you why I loved you so, For fate has come between. I .-Elizabeth Brighton The college is much concerned over the late rumor of the engage- ment of Mr. Harold Bullock to Miss Bess Brown. EITBTSRF HOME OF PARAMOUNT FIRST NATIONAL METRO-GOLDWYN UNIVERSAL AND THE WORLDS GREATEST PICTURES vxqis.,n1uini1oqmi:o1o:41141301014 0 II Office Phone 179 115 W. Main i EdWinPotts I 3 Funeral Director fi F . Ambulance Calls, Anytime. Anywhere, Prompt, Efficient I Satisfactory-Service i EDWIN POTTS - Res. Phone 155 I CARL COOK ' h Res. Phone 1756 S Of' xctoxszoxuyotoiexatoioxoq

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I . THE INKANQUIL Wrmh PAGE 25 PROF. MOYER SPEAKS On the morning of March 10, the College was invited to hear Prof. Moyer of the University of Kan- sas speak on The Chemistry of Common Things . Prof. Moyer's lecture was about sodium, chlorine, hydrogen, nitrogen, oxygen and liquid air. He told something of the properties of each of these elements, and about some of their compounds. The lecture was ac- companied by many interesting demonstrations, and those who were inclined to sleep were staid 'by numerous explosionsthruout the lecture for the purpose of showing the inflamibility of some substance or the power of some high explosive. The audience was most impressed by the liquid air demonstration in which several articles such as flowers, rubber balls and cranberries were frozen in a very few seconds by submerg- ing them in liquid air. Prof. Moy- er performed an experiment in which he burned a steel watch spr- ing in liquid oxygen which has a temperature of nearly 3300 degrees below zero. ORATION AND DECLAMATION The Junior College Declamation and Oratorical Contest was held in Independence this year, and contestants were sent by five schools. The contestants and their selections were as follows: Declamation The White Hands of Telham by Reba Sisk of Parsons, The Last Leaf by Dorothy Decker of Coffey- ville, Wee Willie Winkle by Rachel Gansel of Independence, The Laughter of Leen by Helen Alex- ander of Arkansas City, and The Melting Pot by Earnest Morrison of Fort Scott. Q . 0.01inisuiu1o1o3o1o1cr1uz1v1uio:o1o1n:o1o1i 1 1 1 1 rg '11 anim 05 fi Li ! is A NA TION-WIDE i 5 , S INSTITUTION' 3 ! I I A I I mc. ' I I . DEPARTMENT s'roREs Our Policy Is a Revelation to the Unacquainted I I I I i For many years past J. C. Penny Company goods have I E been accepted by hundreds of thousands of people through- l out the United States as the standard for comparison. Q A single visit to our Store-wherever it may bc local- ! cdg in any of the 44 States in which we opcrate- will Q quickly dispel such thoughts and claims. It will estab- ! lish in your mind beyond a shadow of doubt, that article i for article and dollar for dollar more in genuinely reliable ll i and standard quality can be had than is ordinarily obtain- able. l i Bear in ,mind that with the tremendous buying power Q for our hundreds of Stores goes a SELECTIVE power that U i assures us the better grades of goods. I I I U 5 Q 2 Q' 2 I i i uiqoozuxoxozu an 101 :cafe Oration The Constitution by Eugene Col- opy of Parsons, Citizenship by John Christholm of Coffeyville, The Challenge to Intelligence by Robert D. 'McMichael of Arkansas City, and The Common Citizen by Charles Wogan of Fort Scott. Both the declamation and the oration contests were very close, and the judge must have had a hard time picking the winners. His decision placed Fo1't Scott first, Parsons second, and Coffeyville third in declamation. In oration Arkansas City was first, Parsons second and Coffeyville third. The affirmative debating team, Miss Rachel Gansel, Mr. Harold Bullock, and Mr. James Gilmore, were the house guests of Mr. and Mrs. William Russell, the parents of Miss Pearl Russell, librarian, while in Arkansas City. 410101011izozoxozozoxoxuz I: 55 C. Ray. Shultzg Q 5 u i or phone 126 I Q ! i CLEANING I I 3 PRESSING 3 I l 2 I 5 DYING 3 I i I I 9 I 2 Larvex moth-proof Q j treatment for your 3 winter clothes ' I I 1 I 3 Free if requested Pt' 110113 1111011124 110101, 5