The Illman School - Span Yearbook (Philadelphia, PA)

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THE ILLMAN SCHOOL A PRESENTATION NASMUCH as we have derived so many benefits from the keen observation of the faculty, we have thought it only courteous on our part to reciprocate their interest in our needs and wants. Therefore, during our two years of training, we have endeavored to note the special desires of all our instructors. With this in mind, we hereby present the following gifts to them. To- MISS ILLMAN-A gold bound, jewel studded edition of the complete works of John Dewey. MISS THORPE-A class replete with professional attitude clothes and minds. DR. KINGwAr least ten instead of five girls who are thinking with him. MISS PORTIA MILLER-Two errand girls to take the place of Edith Holloway and Louise Bill. DR. OBERLY-At least one girl who understands at least one question on at least one of his exams. at least once during the year. MISS BERTOLETTE-A few conscientious girls who hnish all of her assignments on time. MISS BAKER-A player piano in tune. MISS MOTHERAL-A room with no back rows. DR. RUSSELL-New worlds to discover. MISS FLORENCE MILLER-A merger of the Perry Picture Company and Theodore Presser's with offices in Philadelphia. MR. HAMMANN-A group of girls in the back of the room who do not own notebooks. MRS. DAVIS-Noiseless typewriters for each individual to save fountain pens and writer's cramp. DR. WEYL-At least two girls who can leave her class feeling that they don't already have measles scabies, T. B., and a general run-down condition. MRS. DOTTERER-A private library of reference books. MISS WATSON-A complete Nursery School set-up. MR. MCKELVIE-A checking room for the girls' chewing gum. MISS MATLACK-A name tag for each girl to give her marvelous memory a rest. MRS. DU PAUL-Four or five monotones for demonstration. MISS MCELWEE-Girls with enough intelligence to find a book. MRS. MACMILLAN-A class of unspoiled children with the requisite amount of savoir faire. MISS WORRELL-An unself-conscious class. MISS QUINN-A frosted window to keep enthusiastic observers from the door of the first and second grade room. MISS GUILFOYLE-A class of Kindergarten, first and second grade children with good posture. Pagc Sevcrily-tna

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THE SPAN-1931 OI-Il Someone related a very strange tale to me the other day. And this is what it was: Fortieth and Baltimore Avenue had never seemed very unusual to me until about a week ago. But from then on it has always reminded me of one of the most curious incidents of my life. I was walking along in a peaceful mood when, suddenly, out of an alleyway came at least twenty girls running at top speed. They raced right across the street and disappeared into the door of a drug store. 'An accident,' I thought. But nol By the time I had reached the alleyway, all of them came running back. They were an odd sight indeed-coats half on, hats on the back of their heads and millions-yes, millions of I-Iydroxes in their hands. Per- haps they had just missed their breakfasts. But where were they going? 'I'll follow them,' I said to myself. By the time I had reached the doorway into which they had disappeared, there was not a soul in sight. All that was in evidence was a bench, a table, a clock, and two bulletin boards. The latter were covered with papers on which were written 'Will the following girls please see me immediately? But there was a hallway on my right. I decided to explore it. Ah, there were my twenty girls all jammed into a little room and screaming, 'Oh, it's out' or 'I-Iere's forty cents for four days and I didn't even read it.' I left there very quickly and thought Iid try the second floor. just then a bell rang. I was pushed up the stairs by an angry mob only to have two doors slammed in my face. Luckily they had windows in them and I could, at least, watch. But what a sight to meet my eyesl There was a girl sitting in a circle with perhaps ten other girls and she was asking them the most absurd questions about a very foolish picture she was holding in her hand. 'What is the little girl looking at? Yes, a dolly. I know a lovely story about a dolly. Would you like to hear it?' At their excited cries of 'Yes,' she began: 'I've a dear little dolly, she has eyes of bright blue-' This was really quite enough. Perhaps the third floor would be better. But a stranger sight was yet to appear. Through one of the doors I saw a lady standing before another group of girls and she was-now can you believe it?-she was sticking her tongue out at them. Not only that but she was making faces and uttering queer sounds. I really didn't know what kind of a place this could be. And in the next room-this is the oddest of all-stood another lady in front of another group of girls. And she was telling them-really seriously telling them-the story of the Three Billy Goats Gruff. Imagine telling grown girls-truly grown- up girls-about three billy goats. This was a strange place indeed! I ran quickly down to the first Hoot and saw two doors there I had missed. I looked in one-and really I almost believe I was dreaming-for there were more girls-really grown- up ones again-playing fno, you wonit believe itj Farmer in the Dell. Actually-playing- Farmer-in-the-Dell. This was no place for me. just as I was about to leave, that bell rang again and I was pushed out of the door and down the steps. As I was trying to pick my poor, bewildered self up from the pavement, twenty, thirty, forty girls rushed at top speed past me and ran down the alleyf, LAURA ELIZABETH SAussER. Page Seventy-one

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THE SPAN-1931 LAST W1LL AND TESTAMENT HE SPAN STAFF of 1931 most willingly bequeath their erasers, pencils, papers, pens, paper clips, notebooks, etc., and what will be left, by June fourth, of their fast decreasing energy and once well-built up nervous system, to the SPAN Staff of 1932. The officers of the Class of 1931 do bequeath to the officers of next year's graduating class any ability they may have in collecting class dues, holding class meetings, getting unanimous agreements on votes and the strong will and vitality necessary to accomplish these things. The Class of 1931 most humbly and heartily bequeath to next yearls Seniors the one or two pages of notes that are not going in their curriculum books, any of their surplus will- power to be used every Saturday morning next year, and that nonchalant and clauntless air which is donned when seeing little white slips inscribed with their names, posted on the bulletin board. Page Seventy-three 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 I 1 1 1 1 I 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 11 I: 41 1 1 1 1 1