Humberside Collegiate Institute - Hermes Yearbook (Toronto, Ontario Canada)

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N true H stew ef many times we could say it back- wards. But since variety is said to be the spice of life, an attempt is being made to point out fuse demonstroj to the better halves of our school the facilitation fan en- tirely original creationj of being popular and in great demand at any dance. Of course, to try fuse conorj to tell a girl anything may be as futile and as useless as tell- ing Mr. Stilwell a hair-raising story, but duty calls. 1. Refuse to dance with the part- ner your escort has chosen for you. This shows him you are extremely independent. Young men just dote on independent women. 2. Never sit out a dance. Re-- sides being bad for the young heart. the moon is also said to turn tlasked ginger ale sour. CSee Chemistry notesj. 3. While struggling a frame with your escort, prattle on unceasingly about the smart dances you've been at, the last, of course, being at the Royal York. Realizing that your modestly admitted popularity makes you a very heavily dated young woman, he will phone every day for the rest of the term. 4. Establish in this young man's mind the fact that you are not of the ordinary type, interested in any such trivial matter as romance. Fill his ears full of the knowledge that you are interested in and thoroughly understand all the rudiments of sports and politics. Young men take girls-to dances just to find the right girl. 5. Use big words. 6. If your escort is small and dark, point out all the blond young giants and remark innocently that you 'hope to be accompanied next time -by a man like that. 7.Wa1lc all over his feet, and noticing his pained expression just Heh, Heh. This will make him laugh so hard that he will forget his feet. And so we desiccate. Q' Q Q s ws 4-3-as .mv Lk: Q , f 0 5'-Qxx 66-3'---' ii J 994 ue! ,Q a ,W i 3 ' . le. V Mi ' sg W we ' 'lah-Sw H. 'R TGPWAV f' Uri..-.Q-if:-94 ifesiaiikifxt! liiffiwea iuilffsreifr Sas: .,,,:. '- C -:::P' .fi -.JM .lmllljijigi Q 3 'QIIIII sg: 1 ij,-v Och mon, gasped the dying Scot, I have but a minute to live. Cie me the ceegar butt in ma pants. -lack Dorricot and Sam Axsmith were plodding down a country road when they met a farmer by the name of Crich. Whei'e, asked jack, do we go to get to Seaforth P Hvlest follow your noses, replied Papa Crich, pointing. But lamented Sammy, we Want to go together I Mr. Hatch to lst form pupil: 7? What's your name, boy? Henry jones. It is customary to say 'sir'. Awright, Sir Henry jones. 138

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gi I X' f cmwiaatma, UT, 0. wait I Ulxnoeldvmtfllatz, O 4 D, Av U is Q A . be ,233 H umouresque S ecufzduy The unpropitious propinquity of the etymon of the word Humour to the etymon of the word Moist- ure tends to exacerbate and acri- date for is it acidulate?j our naturally compatible disposition. But the tenuity of the tergiversation which is the pervertion of Mr. Web- ster's tenebrious and perfidious, though dogmatical, definition of Humour, warns us not to partici- pate in a pernicious and maudlin rodomontade which might coerce us into uttering a terminological in- exactitude. Now you ask, Mr. Jermyn., what bearing has this on the subject? None! We were go- ing' to open by telling about Mr. Bennett who remarked that the foundation of the Aeneid went back to the Romans. And we, in turn, were going to say that our piano was going back to Heintzmanls, but decide-d that this was not quite orig- inal. However, originality has been shown in some cases. Although last year an attempt was made to cut limericks off in their infancy, it has been found that the joy of self expression cannot be restrained, and some mos-t illustrious efforts have been -brought to notice. Though running the risk of printing obscene literature, we submit this maiden's eftort to the public. There was a young lady named Clarke, VV'ho swam out to sea for a lark, Un her third time down, As she started to drown, My Gollylu quoth she, Ain't it dark? And now, with lowered eyes and blushing brow, we, with horror on our faces, whisper to the world that Golly was not the word found on the original masterpiece. The word itself was more expressive than elegant, and so, with much regret, we iind it impossible to print this beautiful little poem. In the preceding edition of this most worthy magazine, advice was given as to the method of being humorous in -black and white. For example : Phillips - Q H ol din g Keast's coatj- What's under this ?', Keast- Under where F Phillips- That's right !', Now, believe it or not, that is funny if you read it enough. VVe ought to know. VVe've read it so 137

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Personal ppearanee Personal Appearance is important to young men in College. KH IFQFU' KILWZTIHIES cusrom TAILGRED '50 Mil V X WN gf o '3' i '72, fll r W YV. A lk i 4i'i:3!:,g 'l 1 li 1 ff fl ' .ll I , . Only a rich man can afford appearance and even then it self-respect. He who is care- less in his clothes is apt to be careless in his Work, in his habits, in his think- ing. ART CLOTHES, tailored to U order promote self?assur- ance, self - respect. They have that good appearance that makes one feel good and it's when one feels his best that he does his best. to be careless of his is evident-lack of ART CLOTHES, are tailored to order by 1 Cook Bros. 8rd Allen Co Limite 483-489 College Street, Toronto ' 139