Hospital of the University of Pennsylvania - Record Yearbook (Philadelphia, PA)

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Chronic Hospitalitis r Yes, Miss Murphy, I'm feelin' some better, but it can't keep up long this way, no how. Yes, I was purtv sick, an' they took me to the hospital, as, of course you know, to the stomach trouble department. I ' l ' h lanche. Yes, Abe went with was carried out of the house on a stretcher an' rushed to the hospita in t e ava me. I couldn't a-stood it alone. HAt the hospital, they knowed I was comin, er y . t f the avalanche on tofa litter an' wheeled me into the reception room, where Abe did the talkin' an' ou o I , signed some papers. Then they took us up to a big long room where there was a great many white beds all alike. They put me in one of them an' give me a cuss basin fer vomitin'. Then Abe had to go. I didn't like the nurse that told Abe he'd have to go 'cause she looked as if she meant it. 'Then a Doctor come an' looked at me, an' felt me here an' there, with tubes in his ears joined together with a silv-er button on the end. He was such a nice young man, he asked me all about my folks as if he'd . . -. I . d k ed them all fer years. I couldn't make it all out, but I know he said I had chron ik gastrateetis, an now that my 'pendix had to come out. I was skeered, but I didn't say noth1n'. I jist layed there weak an pale, fer I felt so bad. An' I didn't sleep that night a-tall. I UI had an enemy in the mornin' an' was then 'got ready fer the knife. What with the shavin' an' the I h d ' scrubbin' an' the paintin' an' the wrappin' up in white cheesecloth, I was all played out. An' , a nt nothin' fer to eat nor drink fer two days, an' I was as weak as a cat. . ' ' ' f the was all ready an' waitin' fer me They lifted me t After a long time waitin', they took me 'to the operatin' room. There, there was nurses an' doctors dressed in long white trinity dresses an' 'white caps. They put me on a long table on wheels all in white. Then I shut my eyes an' they give me the antiseptic, me a prayin' and chokin' an' gaspin' fer breath'til Iknowed no more. . I 'if f'VVhen I was comin' out of ether, the pains was awful. My indecision hurt so, I jist couldn't keep quiet, an' they had to give me epidemics to put me to sleep agen. When Igot awake an' the pains come agen, they capsized me. I felt some better after I was capsized. It was a long time afore I had anything to drink. Then they giver me just a tastehever' now an' then which didn't seem like nothin' a-tall. They give me some albunia water, an' I thought thatswas the best thing I ever had.' Then when I could eat, I asked 'fer a hyper- thorophy-free diet, fer I thought it ought to do me good. They was awful careful after that what they give me to eat, fer they wanted to. please me. I asked for an X-ray. They told meI didn't-need one, but I knowed that was what I oughta had. Susie Jackson said an X-ray was what helped her so. I didn't git it though. A 114 p A .

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Where is the stomach trouble department? Overheard in the Dispensaries You're a tonsilleetomy, aren't you? NO, ma'am, my name's Smith. 'Are you the doctor that looks at lumps under the arm?'l Will you please be quiet While I percuss? V i Has Dr. Elmer given you a diagnosis of your case yet? 'Yes, I had two last night, and they Worked me nearly to death. ffnigifaiisw' ffnid you? 'Please, ma'am, Where do you go for arms an' legs? 7? 'Yes, I had the 'flu' an' got Well. Then I Went out in the Wet an' got an elapse 113

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CC ' .Qld YO? hCH.f aboutujoe Smith's boy? He has conclusion of the brain, was hurt in the coal mine this mornin and is layin low in the hospital this blessed minit. Mandy heard it at the post-oflice. An' Sam Moore, poor man, burned the flesh on his arm to the bone. Mrs. Moore heats sand bags on the gas range to lay around them to draw out the information. But I ain't a-tellin, how she's cheatin' the gas man to do it. ff 'cliint it awful? This world is full of affiiction. I wonder why ,tis some folks hez to have so much Su Crm. Oh, must you be goin , Miss Murphy? VVeQl, you must come agen soon. Your visits always cheer me up so. Goodbye, Miss Murphy. ' 'CI wish I had had an X-ray! Mebbe Ild be well today if I -had had the X-ray treatment! A Patient s Lamentation Of all earth's travelers belated here, I '4I've tried to like this place, she said today, ' There was none so pitiful or dejected more, Where capsules, pills and mice all have their sway, Than one sad patient as she entered here, Where perfumeof iodoform profuse, With her hands and knees arthritic sore, Smells like flower-beds of paradise, let loose, First being accosted as she reached the stair Where nurses garbed in blue and white array, By one fair lassie neat and debonairg Politely disappear when I begin to pray, Whom shall we notify, in case --P said she, Where tall Herculean doctors, dressed in white, Write out the names, that you may interred be, Colossal structures of verbosity and might, 'fIn case of what? Oh, do let me run outll' When dwells the midnight hour, the time to sleep, The patient cried, f'Am I to die of gout? Let pour rhapsodic melodies that weep, Sweet notes of love, spontaneously, until Of hospitals and all, I've had my fill. 115