Highland Park College - Piper Yearbook (Des Moines, IA)

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l --rg I - ' 5' I F if-4' ' , 4 J ' ua A don't know what to think of it. Can't say anything definite, but one thing sure, her bereave- ments have not succeeded in turning her gold hair to silver grayf, The girls are going to add u children's show room to their establishment in the near future and Jeanette Mitchell will go over soon to advise on that. You know she demonstrated the baby layette and child dressing so nicely back at old Highland that she will be great at this. Besides, the practical experience she has had with her own four children will make her a valuable asset to this new department. I suppose you know that Gertrude Norman's husband finally withered away. Poor girl. she grieved so, but it comes by her being overly patriotic. Her friends say that the world war made such an impression on her that she could never get over observing wheatless, meat- less and even eatless days, and the older she grew the more fanatical she became on the sub- ject. She tried to make up for it as best she could with extra tabledecorations, pimento hearts, nut cups, etc., but he just quietly faded away, though he was loyal to the end. Gertrude has lately opened l1er beautiful home on the Hudson for the use of Mabel Hal- verson in founding her Institute of Thought Transmission. The subject is quite wonderful, but only lately did I hear how Hallie came to arrive at her conclusions. It seems that she married that soldier friend of hers and he was promoted hy the government to the post of military diplomat to Mars. In that capacity he was ordered to accompany Dean Weaver in her dietetical investigation on that planet. Hallie could never get over her aversion to the condensed gasses used to temper and reinforce the atmosphere on those long trips and hence did not go. She says that during his absence she would unconsciously spend long afternoons in concentrated thought of him and was amazed one afternoon to perceive a return message to one of her projected queries and further astounded to sense a real and tangent line of mental telepathy established between personal magnetism and electricity, the practical appli- cation of which has made thought transmission much more direct and desirable than telephone or telegraph. ' But I must tell you of some of the Highland girls I found up here around the Pole, and by the way, Ivan, you must plan to spend a vacation with them and get some new ideas for your winter garden. I see them often, for this is my third trip to Mars and we always em- bark from the North Pole because it is so much easier to break through pressure lines. Nellie Belnn has charge of the D. S. Experiment Station here and, with the able assistance of Helen Reid and Nettie Heidman, runs a very extraordinary cafeteria in connection with it. Pearl Matthews also makes her home here. You know it was her husband who made the first practical use of refracted light and heat. By means of the mannnoth plant he installed here, thousands of acres have been thawed out around the polar regions and we have fresh fruits and vegetables the year around as surely as we have the regulation twelve hours day and t.welve hours night. Pearl says her husband could never have done so much with refrac- tion had it not been for the use of the fourth dimension which Prof. Galloway literally scared him into discovering one morning in class. lt seems that the Prof. had a new Des Moines student on the firing line, rather timid at reciting, and at whom he wished to measure out his opinions in such sizes and qualities that he found no adequate means at hand, consequently he turned upon her quaking friend, who immediately produced the fourth dimension that the tirade might be continued against the the other fellow. Of course, it was rather n yellow thing to do, for the student is now totally paralyzed, but I suppose he ought to he happy in the thought that he was a martyr to the great cause of progress. Well, Ivan, I must think of closing, for I have told you of most of the girls as I have come upon them in my various travels. As for myself, I suppose I shall always be a wanderer, since my quest for information and my desire to make known my own takes me everywhere. l know u1y theory of one race amal- gamated from all, one religion and one body politic will one day come to be. The fusion of humanity is already on its way and whether we believe it evoluted from some one neces- sary substance or generated from a connnon parentage, we do know that matter is indestruct- ible and what once was can again resolve itself into its own or by the help of God's agents become what we will it. And now, Ivan, I really must close with the wish that your glorious work for D. S. goes on, and on, and on. And listen, when you fear for my safety in my long rambles, as you phrase it, imagine me repeating that little poem, To a Water Fowl, especially the stanza: There is power, whose care Teaches thy way along the pathless coast, The desert and illimitable air, Lone wandering, but not lost. Yours in friendship, Grace Borland.

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ti KJ fy, N c L , K 1 -P Lx K. 4 1 1-.. A. ,, Y . t 1 Y 'YT Hee Club Prophecy North Pole, Earth's End, May l, 1938. College of Greater Highland, National D. S. Training School, Ivan Wane Miller, Dean. Dear Ivan : Well, it seems that about every so often you project a desire for a letter into my thought receptacle and this call I always heed, for I know it would be quite impossible for you to keep track of me in my aircraft, I am such a wandering gypsy of the solar system. Then, too, I am always quite sure to find you rather securely shackled to that wonderful D. S. Training Slghool into which our little Hee Department grew after the government took that subject in c arge. You know, Ivan, away back in 1918, when the High Cost of Living used to lurk like a spectre in the background of every wedding feast, we women spent so much and knew so little of the value received that I sometimes wonder that marriage as a legal necessity and the home as our fundamental institution did not pass out of existence. It was at this critical period, or thereabout, that a solution for placing the home as Amer- ica's great institution upon a firm and lasting basis occurred to Miss Emma Thornwall, our class president. She proposed to gain this great end by making woman suffrage a national gift and then educating womankind to a knowledge of its greatest usefulness. Her three years' campaign, backed by such staunch and untiring talkers as Catherine Calli- son, Thelma Wilkinson, and May Rooney, is now a matter of history. As a solution for our great social question, the world has found nothing better and its proof may be seen in the residential suburbs clustering peacefully around every industrial center and the apparent ab- sence of rooming houses. Vice is on the decline and soon a policeman will be but a corner ornament and a mere relic of the ancient regime. I remember well when that bill of Geraldine Freeman's was before congress making two years' home training a part of compulsory education in the life of every school girl. I believe it was the Hon. Laura Gray who added the amendment requiring that every girl appearing be- fore a county clerk for a license to become a wife he able to produce a certificate showing that she had had home training. Really, Ivan, when you stop to consider the strides we are making in the path of progress it hardly seems possible that twenty years could have brought them all. For instance, there is that wonderful method of counteracting the law of gravity worked out by Prof. Zuker in his study of gasses. Merely a pressure neutralizer whereby the pressure of the ether envelope surrounding the earth once known as the force of gravity is neutralized as a biplane splits its way from one part of the solar system to another. I understand he had a great many suggestions on the subject from Miss Velylna Ford, who had returned to the laboratory for an intensive study of color and textiles. I By the way, Ivan, I dropped down in Paris last year and visited Velyma in her shop. You know she is a wonderful modiste and specializes in evening gowns, where her sense of the unique and extreme, together with her love of color, finds unlimited scope and its best ap- preciation. She certainly .has come into her own. I was not a little surprised to find Irene Krampy displaying the gowns, she wore them to a great advantage, for time has touched her very lightly. I knew she had married some imprudent Pharmic shortly after graduation, but she tells me that since she has tried three other specimens of the genus homo and found them all very much alike. She remarks that when you swear to love and cherish one of the individuals it seems to include the assumption that you are neither to walk, talk, sing, dance nor even pleasantly chat with another of the same genus, and since she could never make her eyes behave she has to be content with draw- ing rich alimony from all four. And oh, yes, ,lay Hanson is there, loo, but she has full charge of the street frocks. You know .lay had considerable taste balanced by rare good judgment, and Paris gained something when that trio went over. Jay also has had her matrimonial experiences, even to being wid- owed three times. She says all her husbands died natural deaths, .but I met Mayme Wooster, who married one of Irene Krampy's husbands and now lives in Chicago, and she hinted that Hannah Jay was always deeply interested in the arsenic tests up in the old Chem. Lab. I

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le 7 r jiff- gi-f - --K5l'??57'n -'J Rtgf 41 ua R 1 fi-- 1 e .7 , W if 'x 44 , Aix- ' ,- A - it ' ' H r ' 'lfisx ,dizz- . is D 1 - . . ,,,f-X.. - X ' gg 1 :'4 -. ,M X ' , , ie'Q'Q' 'N--' ,-fn , ,-' ' X ' 1' ' 1 , '- Y 1. '77 tt O Q, , .4 1 f M6 1 f' The Hoover Drill Members-The Misses Hanson, Heidman, Hovey., Wilkilzsolt, Golden, Matthews, Borland, , Miller, Gray, Watlalld, Reiter, Halverson, and Wooster. The Hoover Drill, a farcical military movement with song parodies emphasizing conser- vation, was composed by Grace Borland, and, with the excellent teamwork of the twelve above named girls of the Home Economics Department, produced for the College Vandeville in January. lt' was later given at the Hoyt Sherman House for the Des Moines Wo1x1an's Clnh and again for the Register-Tribune Conservation Food Show at the Auditorium. SONG PARODIES ON BERLIN AND OVER THERE It's a long way to Berlin, but we'll get there. Uncle Sam will show the way, Over the line and across the Rhine, Shouting Hip! Hip! Hooray! We'll sing Yankee Doodle, Under the Linden, With some real live Yankee pep! Hep! It's a long way to Berlin, but we'll get there, And we're on our way, By Hec tDepartmentl. What? Sure! Everybody, then-- V Rah! Rah! Hee Department! Over there, over there, send the word, send the word, over there, That our Tuesdays are meatless, our Wednesdays are wheatless, - We eat less and less every day. , Tell Kaiser Bill he'll get his fill, W'e'l1 send it all to the Y. M. C. A. We'll stand hy Hoover and send them over, And we'll all conserve till it's over, over there.