High School of Commerce - Caravel Yearbook (New York, NY)

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COMMERCE YEAR BOOK, 1911 John looked at Helen, and Helen looked at John. Then they both turned around and looked up the road in search of a house. But this and the following search failed to reveal anything resembling a house. Tohwait for a passing car or any vehicle was useless, since the road was unfrequented. It was also beginning to rain. Seeing there was nothing else to do, they set out to walk to their destination. No one, no matter how happy he or she may be, can keep up his spirits in the face of a four-mile walk, a rain and a rough road, with nothing over his clothes. Both John and Helen were no exceptions. After they had gone a mile, they stopped kissing and walked sile11tly on, john talking beneath his breath. VVhen they had gone three miles, they were walking a foot apart. After three miles had been covered, Helen was beginning to scold John, as is the custom among women. She blamed him for luring her from a comfortable home to a walk in the rain. She talked as if John had known that the gasoline was going to give out and that it was going to rain. She was absolutely sure that she was going to have a severe attack of pneumonia, after which she was going to die. And poor John, trudging along with his hands in his pockets and his collar turned up, had nothing to say, for the simple reason that he was thinking. To marry a girl who could talk so, was impossible. He would . . . but here his meditations were cut short by their arrival at the minister's house. Their ill-luck was not to end here, however. 'When they had been admitted by the ministerfs wife, they found that her husband was not at home. This was the last straw. VVithout a word to John, Helen followed her hostess to a room where she could change her clothing. John also changed his, putting on one of the minister's suits, given him by that man's wife. ' The arrival of the minister did not cause a marriage. Instead Helen prevailed upon that good man to drive her home, while John went back to his automobile with a can of borrowed gasoline. Now both Helen andhjohn are happily married, but not to each other. They are, however, the best of friends. 65

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COMMERCE YEAR BOOK, 1911 1 la S I OR RSE 1 'Q 43 F , V e ff ig, 'l4Lf ,jf tr ' r s 55, 3 , a s si ..1Wl f 's L ,H - 3497? - 14645 Z in g-' W ,,H,, f,,,' 1. g l J 01 ,5 f' V udliiim : 2 '- - I Ztaappp her Qfter ABNER RATNER, IQI3 leon,-on HEY were young and they were foolish. She was small, slim and pretty: -it' ? he was tall, broad and handsome. They were also in love, or they gg, thought they were, between which two things lie,-happiness and .M Je sorrow. 7 4 ul If two people of the opposite sex are in love, they either marry and live happy, or they do not marry and are sorry ever after. If two people think they are in love, they do not marry and live happy, or they marry and always regret that they have done so. Knowing this, the parents of Miss Helen opposed her marriage to Mr. John, until proof of his love should some day be shown. But, being young and foolish, as I have already said, Miss Helen and Mr. John decided to disobey the, in their opinion, stern old people, who l1ad never been young. All of which leads up to an elopement. An elopement is the running away of a couple in love, but not necessarily ending in marriage, proof of which can be found in any good dictionary. It happened on a day in March, to be exact, the ninth day. Now, as every educated person knows, nine is an unlucky number, which every uneducated person will acknowledge after he reads this story. It promised to be a fine day, and in the morning the hero of this tale brought his car around to the home of the heroine. who was waiting for him. He helped her into the car in a most loverlike way, and they set out for the minister's home, ten miles away. There are two roads to the home of this particular minister, one smooth and open, which most people used, and the other rough and narrow, which was used very seldom. For some reason, known only to Mr. John, he chose the latter road. The first half of the journey is not for me to chronicleg only the angels of God have that right. The second half, however, is more prosaic. It begins with a Bang! This noise is commonly associated with the report of a gun, but it will also serve for a punctured tire. Oh, Jack! came from Mr. John's shoulder with a slight shiver, what is it? Nothing, Nellie, only the tire, returned her manly protector, aecompanying his reply with a kiss. I'll soon tix it. After some delay the tire was changed, and the journey resumed. Again I must omit any description, until, without a sound, the car came to a full stop. A brief investigation revealed the fact that all the gasoline was gone. 64

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COMMERCE YEAR BOOK, 1911 ignbnah-Zeal! layer BEING AN EPISODE or THE FACULTY GAME BY HARRY KLIPPER, '13 'lhey wrote it dow11 P, Bohnad, in the Commerce teachers' Roll, We fellows called him Mathy in a manner that was drollg Not .that we thought him Christy fthough his curves were wondrous fine In circles and hyperboles-his figure-from behindj. Ivlot that he was a pitcher, nor that we thought he knew 'lhe difference when the Umpire says You're out! from That's strike two. But-.the fact is, 'twas a nickname that some gay chap did invent Xvlllllll lniplied that dear old Bohny was of geometric bent. Yet he was a wondrous player Cmodestly he told the samej. But this is introduction-let us hurry to the game. -'Twas the last half of the ninth, our loved Faculty was sore: Pitted 'gainst their fondest foemeng neither side had made a score. And how they hated Clinton! just last season she had won From our sweetest bunch of wise men-year before we'd had the fun. So there's reason for the long, wild yell that fairly rent the air NVhen young Sprig, who taught us English, shattered thrice the atmosphere. But when Pringle, History-wonder, did the same in noble style, You'd have opined that Commerce had a premium on a smile. Here-'twas here-O gentle reader, can you guess what then occurred? If I thought so, do believe me, I'd not whisper one wee word, Though my heart grieves at the telling. though I hold you- in suspense, Though it's hard to keep you waiting when the momentis so intense, Still I have to speak it softly, choosing words thatfmatch with Fame: For-Patronius Bohnad at this stage went in the game. just like immortal Casey, slow our hero took his place, VVell he knew his dread position-not a tremor crossed his face, VVith a toss he Hung his wavy locks back from his brainful brow, His eyes Hasherl fire, his teeth clicked firm, you can imagine how. And then like old pal Casey, when the pitcher hurled the sphere, VVith might and main and bat he swung-Temporal and oh dear! He swung like Casey, but unlike that much o'errated chap, Bat and ball collided with a crack like thunder-clap! Bat and ball collided, but-Oh, must I this relate? C1-low fast, how fleeting is fair Fame that slips by e'en the great D Though Bohny hit that sphere as neler 1've seen one hit before, Though it traveled far. oh, far beyond the place they keep the scoreg Though he'd bragged about his baseball, and we now believe each word- Bohnad sprang away like deer-hound, but horrors !-down towards third! . Vain-in vain they screamed him warnings, jeered and cursed him, too, in vain Can one check the blind tornado? Can one hold the hurricane? Like a streak of shooting lightning he circled those four bags, . Crossed home, got up, then bang !-his back the opposing catcher tags. And while the mighty roar that rose dropped short to blank dismay, fFor we said, 'fthe score's still tied and there's no more time to play.'lJ A Clintonese instructor. a geometric fiend, . Came rushing up exclaiming with a grim and awful nnen: The game is ours, see Umpire !-we've won, our side has won! Though Clinton, true, has failed to score, Commerce is MINUS ONE! Oh, scattered through this grand old .globe lim pretitv sure,you'll find Many a teacher ball-team, where the kids arevleft to grind, Many a gallant Commerce game. replete with fight and fun, But none-O never! lost before by 21 SCOTC of 111111115 0116- 66